By Joe Backstock It was in ancient Italy, a deadly hatred grew
Between old Caleb Capulet and Moses Montague Now Moses has an only son, a little dapper beau, The pet of all the pretty girls; by name young Romeo.
And Caleb owned a female girl, just home from boarding school, Miss Juliet was her Christian name—for short they called her Jule. To bring the lady out, he gave a ball at his plantation.
And thither went young Romeo without an invitation. One Tybalt (kinsman to the host) began to growl and pout, And watched an opportunity to put the fellow out.
But Caleb saw the game, and said, "Now, cousin, don't be cross; Behave yourself or leave the room; are you or I the boss?" When Juliet saw Romeo, his beauty did enchant her; And Romeo, he fell in love with Juliet instanter.
Now, lest their dads should spoil the fun, but little time they tarried; Away to Squire Lawrence sped, and secretly were married.
O, cruel fate! that day the groom met Tybalt in the square; And Tybalt, being very drunk, at Romeo did swear. Then Romeo his weapon drew (a knife of seven blades); And made a gap in Tibby's ribs that sent him to the shades.
The watchmen came; he took to flight, down alley, street and square; The Charlies ran, o'ertook their man, and took him 'fore the Mayor. Then spake the worthy magistrate (and savagely did frown),
"Young man you have to lose your head, or else vamose the town." He chose the last, and left his bride in solitude to pine;
"Ah, me!" said she, "our honeymoon is nothing but moonshine." And then to make the matter worse her father did embarrass, By saying she must give her hand to noble Count de Paris. "This suitor is a goodly youth; to-day he comes to woo; If you refuse the gentleman, I'll soundly wallop you."
She went to Squire Lawrence's cell, to know what must be done; The squire bade her to go to bed, and take some laudanum.
"'Twill make you sleep, and seem as dead; thus canst thou dodge this blow; A humbugged man, your pa will be—a blest one, Romeo.'
She drank, she slept, grew want and cold; they buried her next day; That she'd piped out her lord got word, far off in Mantua.
Quoth he, "Of life I've had enough; I'll hire Bluffkin's mule Lay in a pint of Balface rum and lie tonight with Jule."
Then rode he to the sepulchre, 'mong dead folks, bats and creepers, And swallowed down the burning dose, when Juliet ope'd her peepers!
"Are you alive? Or is't your ghost? Speak quick, before I go." "Alive!" she cried, "and kicking, too; art thou my Romeo?" "It is your Romeo, my faded little blossom;
Oh, Juliet! is it possible that you were acting possum?" "I was, indeed; now let's go home; pa's spite will have abated, What ails you love, you stagger so? Are you intoxicated?" "No, no, my duck, I took some stuff that caused a little fit." He struggled hard to tell her all, but couldn't—so he quit. In shorter time than takes a lamb to wag his tail or jump, Poor Romeo was stiff and pale as any whitewashed pump. Then Juliet seized that awful knife, and in her bosom stuck it, Let out a most terrific yell, fell down and "kicked the bucket."
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 7, 1860, p. 2, c. 3
Enoch at the Calico Ball.—The first Calico Ball of this season, was given at Point Clear several nights ago, and as it was an event at the Point, the Mobile Register dispatched its poetical man Enoch down there to bring away a corresponding impression. Enoch disguised himself and went in. He says:
Think of the large dinning [sic] saloon, denuded of the usual dining room furniture, brilliantly lightened, and beautifully hung with rich and bright-hued steamers [sic?]—and, by the way, these decorations and the large bouquets of flowers pendant on the walls were arranged by Chamberlain himself, for I saw him fix them up—the music of Gass's own band inviting the willing and waiting multitude to "go in;" think of the dazzling throng which pound into the saloon through the large folding doors seperating [sic] the reception rooms from the seat of entertainment; of the scores of lovely women in every imaginable style of dress, and dress of every imaginable hue, texture and richness; of good looking old men, and middle aged men, and young men, the whole forming a congregation of the spottedest, streakedest, speckledest, and stripedest being of the male and female persuasions that ever walked through a plain quardrille [sic], or bedizzled its head in rounding the mazes of the terpsiwhirlian waltz. Think of all this; and beauty, grace, taste and all that, ab libitum, and can you be supprised [sic] that your Enoch forgot his corns, his age, his staid position before the rising generation—indeed his everything— and because [sic?] enthused? You would have done it yourself. Yes, if you had been there, no presure [sic] of moral suasion would have kept your shining boots from leading your sober body into saltatorial action. I am now sure, even, that you would'nt [sic] have taken "Innocence"— who, by the way combined with herself so much of "Modesty" that I could'nt [sic] ferret out her name—for your first partner.—Enough be it to say that I, Enoch, was jerked from under myself by the striking gaiety of the scene, and wasn't led down again until I—was physically exhausted. DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 13, 1860, p. 2, c. 3
Discovery of a New Color.—A letter from Paris states that a new color has been
discovered, produced from coal tar. It is called dianthine and varies from a deep purple to all the shades of bright rose color.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 18, 1860, p. 2, c. 1 Outrageous Conduct.—On Sunday evening last, our city was visited with a most pestilential simoon of drunkness [sic]. A company of men paraded the streets under the
Democratic doctrine, that "in union there is strength," committing all manner of outrages on persons and property, causing the stores and houses to close, and for a time taking complete possession of the place. It cannot be said the parties are not known—it cannot be said that there is not evidence to convict them, and it the question arises, where are the authorities, who are in the regular pay of the people to do what is clearly their duty, if any duty at all is required of them. This is not the first or second time that such disgraceful scenes have been witnessed in Baton Rouge of late years, and the violators of the law do so with impunity. Shall we admit that the parties, who are charged with the duty of arresting such and calling on others to aid them, when their power fails, are incompetent to the duty? Yes—this is the naked truth. The people are responsible for this condition of things. The evils all come out of that pandoras box, of all evil; the ballot box, which we for one are in favor of abolishing, if it can do nothing better than elevate to place, men, notoriously unfit for place. Where is the Mayor of the city—the Justice left to administer justice—the Marshal of the city and his assistant? We are all interested in these inquiries, and if there are not sober people enough—law abiding citizens, to see these evils corrected, the entire machinery of the city government had better be turned out to grass.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 18, 1860, p. 3, c. 1 Debaters Attention.—There will be a regular meeting of the Sugar Bowl Debating Society, this evening at 7½ o'clock, at the usual place of meeting.
At the last regular meeting of the society, the following question, "Are the opinions of S. A. Douglas with regard to Territories constitutional," was ably discussed by Messrs. Walters, Stuart, Annie, Muguet, LeBlanc and J. H. Hardon on the affirmative, and by Messrs. Favrot, C. O. & J. H. Hardy, Read, and McGimpsey on the negative. . . .
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 22, 1860, p. 2, c. 1 ["] A Negro Killed.—A party of gentlemen were out hunting this morning when their dogs got on the trail of a negro in the cornfield of Mr. J. A. Dougherty, just above town, and run him up to a heavy briar thicket near the Montesano, where he took refuge and fought desperately against his assailants. He killed five of the dogs with a large butcher knife, then fled on hearing the hunters approach. He refused to obey their orders to stop and surrender, when a number of shots were fired with effect, and he fell dead. He is of copper complexion, heavy moustache, and bears a striking resemblance to an Indian. His place of retreat in the briar thicket was found and was well stored with provisions.—Advocate, Thursday. ["]
The necessity which requires the use of dogs, to capture runaways must be regretted by all, and it ought to be the very last resort. Those who know the evils, which require such violent correctives, are more competent to judge of the practice than we are. The training of dogs for such a purpose, commenced we believe, in the cruel warfare against the Indians of Florida, and for our part, we wish it hat ended there.
That the fugitive should fight for his life when beset by a pack of savage dogs, is in obedience to the common dictates of humanity.—There should be some other cause for the use of the gun in such cases. Coroner Jones informs us, that the man referred to by the Advocate, was one of the poor, miserable, and degraded race of Indians, who were at one time the lords and landholders of the country. As far as Louisiana is concerned, they are nearly extinct, and the verdict of any jury of inquest, might be "died of whiskey." What few remain, as long as they do not violate the laws—of which like others, better circumstanced—they live in ignorance—they should receive our protection, if they have not our sympathy.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 27, 1860, p. 2, c. 1
Courting.—The world affords a great many amusements for those of its inhabitants who feal [sic] disposed to participate in them; but among them all, we know of none from which more genuine pleasure can be extracted than that of a few hours spent in company with a piece of calico for whom you cherish a "tender feeling." Courting is perhaps one of the most heavenly pastimes ever invented, as well as one of the greatest luxuries young people can indulge in. Still, at the same time we would remind those of our young friends who feel a desire to "take partners" for a bliss cotillion, of the absurdity of spending too much time in this way in order to find out if a woman possesses all the necessary qualities to make a good wife. A man should be able to tell in a week whether a woman would do for a wife.
The judgment of true love is intuitive; a glance and it is done. A man of genius has in his own imagination a standard of the subject of his love—an unexplainable model—the prototype to which exists somewhere in reality, although he may never have seen or heard of her. This is wonderful, but it is true. He wanders about the world, impervious to all the delicious, thrilling, soulmelting beams of beauty, till he reaches the right one. There are blue eyes—they are tender, but they touch not him.—they are black—they are piercing but his heart remains whole. At length, accident flings him into contract with a creature—he hears the tones of her voice—he feels the warm streams of soul shining from her countenance. Gaze meets gaze, and thought sparkles into thought, till the magic blaze is kindled, and they fall in love with as much
suddenness as they would fall overboard. Before they know they are "going," they are "gone," like broken plates at a street auction.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], September 28, 1860, p. 2, c. 3-4
Ladies' Fall Fashions.—The New York Commercial Advertiser, of the 20th, says:
The proposed general opening for the milliners, mantua and dressmakers, takes place next Thursday. With regard to ball dresses, in consequence of the early arrival of the Prince of Wales, the prospect is very good, and richness of taste and elegance of material will not be spared in making interesting occasion, (the grand ball at the Academy of Music,) one of the most recherche affairs of this year of exciting and important events.
Among the bonnets are to be some of the finest description of velvet that can be made. The groundwork of one that we have seen, is composed of white uncut velvet, ornamented by fruit of gold and black color, with rich purple velvet leaves. The front trimmings are composed of moss roses and blonde, with strings of with [sic] and gold.
Another style is composed of purple uncut velvet, ornamented with point lace, purple grapes with gold stem, stars with connecting chains of gold, &c.
Another is an evening bonnet of cherry colored velvet and point lace, with marabout plumes, fastened with gold pins. The front trimmings are composed of marabout plumes and blonde.
Still another is a chapeau de visite, and is made of purple and black velvet, with curling ostrich plumes, the front trimmings are composed of velvet flowers and blonde lace.
Another is a very rich article and is formed of pink uncut velvet and ostrich feathers; the latter looking as if they were carelessly thrown upon the bonnets and had there rested. This style has ornaments. The front trimmings are moss roses and blonde.
We need scarcely tell our lady readers that the "scoop" or "coal scuttle" hat has entirely vanished, and the style of the new fashions is a neat, small bonnet suitable to almost any feature, adding beauty to the beautiful, dignity to the queen-like, and improving the appearance of all.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], October 3, 1860, p. 2, c. 4
The Government Arsenal at San Antonio.—The new arsenal in course of erection at San Antonio, is thus noticed in the Herald of the 21st:
The office, which is now nearly completed, is a very unique and substantial building; size, 25 by 60 feet, with a ten foot gallery on both sides, divided into two rooms 25 feet square, 15 feet ceiling, with a hall in the center 10 feet wide.
The laboratory, which is not yet completed, is also 25 by 60 feet in size, and will be divided into two rooms.
The whole force are now engaged upon the magazine, which is progressing rapidly toward completion. The size is 110 by 30 feet; from floor to crown of arch 16 feet, and from outside 25 feet. The whole building presents a perfect specimen of strength and durability.
The main building will probably be commenced some time during the coming winter. Its dimensions are 45 by 130 feet, three stories in height, will stand 100 feet from Flores street, and will be a beautiful structure.
There are also several other buildings yet to be erected, after which the entire premises will be enclosed with a stone wall.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], October 4, 1860, p. 2, c. 3
Did'nt [sic] Dead-Head Him, Evidently. The La Grange (Texas) True Issue gives the following dismal descriptive sketch of a "one-horse show!"
A one-horse show passed through our town the other day, the principal of which was "Jo Bowers," and in this connection we have to record the dismal fact that we, together with other enterprising sightseekers, have been "taken in and sold."
Although the consoling reflection presents itself to our mind, that the wisest statesmen, the greatest philosophers and profoundest moralists, have, at times in their weak moments, been "humbugged," yet this consolation is no better than gall and wormwood, in view of the
melancholy fact that we have been chiseled out of a hard-earned half-dollar, which we grieve to say, has departed forever from our heirs or assignees, and is now, in all probability, (horrid idea,) reposing in the unpoetical depths of the aforesaid "Joseph Bowers" pantaloons pocket. The over- curious mind may ask what we saw and heard. A proper appreciation of the singing was
prevented by the generous applause of the admiring audience.
As to the dancing, we are not a good judge of dancing, but, in spite of our admitted incapacity in this respect, the idea would obtrude itself into our mind, that a striking similarity existed between this part of the performance and the motions of a youthful and light-hearted hippopotamus, disporting himself upon the sunny banks of the Niger.—Among the attractions of show was the "blue-coated" fiddler, who seemed to occupy a large space in the appreciative eye of the audience. The wonderful placidity and the calm repose of this young man, amid cries and yells made to attract his attention, filled us with awe and admiration. While he applied himself with commendable assuidity [sic] to his fiddle, his serene eye and unruffled soul disdaining earth's vulgar crew, seemed to have pierced the roof and wandered in must companionship to some distant star, and, perchance, if he did look at you, the disagreeable impression was left upon your mind that he saw through you and gazed into space beyond. These were some of the things we saw, and if we are out a little, the consoling consciousness is left of having contributed a mite to the modern muse.
DAILY GAZETTE & COMET [BATON ROUGE, LA], October 6, 1860, p. 2, c. 1
Can Such Things Be?—It was a fit night, was that of Tuesday last, for a merciless deed. It was black and dark enough for any action—it rained and the wind howled pitiously [sic], without a single flash from heaven, to give a ray of hope to the traveler. The earth seemed given to the furies, and terror filled the weak house of man; his frail tenements were blown down and his trees torn up. A fit time this, for that terrible offence, against the laws of God, and man, which some human being with the heart of a foul fiend, perpetrated on the road. In the vicinity of the plantation of J. A. and W. D. Stokes, about nine miles east of this, was found, on the morning after that terrible night a new born babe, as God in his mercy had spoken it into existence. It had been stifled by the monster's hand that took it there, to prevent its cries (a needless cruelty, since the storm fiend howled above its feeble voice) and there in its innocence and purity, was it murdered—apparently by being dashed against a tree—and thrown in the underbrush. A jury of inquest was held, but no clue had to the author of this—the most hellish