The transition to adulthood involves the individual in taking on different responsibilities in life, which can be particularly challenging for individuals with ASD. All of the interviewees in the present study were adults, and their ages ranged from 18 to 51.
One of the interview questions that was asked was: ‘How do you feel about being an adult now?’ Two of the participants declared that on reaching the age of 18 years they felt they were becoming adults, but sometimes they feel confused, scared, and they had mixed feelings towards this transition to adulthood. Charles said:
‘Maybe it was pretty easy because I knew in Britain, from the age of eighteen, you’re deemed to be an adult, I knew that by law you’re allowed to leave school at the age of sixteen, so it was fairly easy.’ (Charles)
Charles, a 45 years old male continued by speaking about his worries after leaving school and transitioning to the adulthood, such as the transition to work and having different
relationships with people. All of these different upcoming transitions to adulthood left Charles wondering about his future and feeling afraid of the new life and routines. He said:
‘Looking forward to it, frightened, because being at school I was used to the
environment, I knew how I was supposed to behave – coming out into somewhere else where I was going to have to learn a new routine, meet new people, learn new things – am I going to fit in? Am I going to find somebody who actually likes me, for once? It was a mixture of one: fright, fear – looking forward to a new change – thinking: “I might actually be able to earn some money – I’m going to actually spend my own money, rather than having to wait for other people to give me money,” et cetera – so very mixed.’ (Charles)
Daisy also knew that she became an adult when she reached 18 years of age. She stated that she was afraid of that transition to adulthood. She said:
‘How did I know I became an adult? When I was about 18 and, no when things changed for me, like not just physically but mentally and I just felt myself completely changing and even changing my mind about certain things like than I felt before… It’s kind of scary but that’s quite normal for everyone, but it is quite a big change but I’m, it’s, I’m happy at the same time, because I’m a full on adult now.’ (Daisy)
However, half of the interviewees (3 adults) cited that they still felt that they were not adults yet. Some of them said they felt like children, while others just still felt confused. They were also asked, “if they reached the acceptance of being adults?” and this half of the participants spoke about their difficulties of accepting themselves as adults now. For example one of the participants stated his confusion and his difficulties with accepting that he was now an adult, along with having the sense of still being a child rather than a grownup. He said:
‘I still don’t know [laughter]. Even now I just have to look in the mirror sometimes, and I still don’t really accept it. I still feel like a kid.’ (David)
David explained that his feeling of still being a child was because he still wanted to have fun and enjoy his time, instead of being an adult, which he found boring probably because of the responsibilities that comes with reaching adulthood, such as being employed. He said:
‘Well I seem to have the way the world should work, the value system of an adult – I’ve always had that – but I just seem to want to have fun and things like that, whereas adults seem to be always boring and work really hard. Don’t get me wrong, I can work hard but I want to play as well. Maybe it’s me and people outgrow it as they get older or they forget that it’s important to have fun as well as work hard.’ (David)
Michael was also confused about whether he felt like an adult yet. He said:
‘Considering my maturity, I’m probably not an adult [laughter], but I seem old and I give good advice. I don’t think I’m an adult yet, I’m not sure.’ (Michael)
Additionally, Jasmine expressed her feelings of not being an adult. She felt that mentally she had not reached adulthood even though she physically looked like an adult. She explained:
‘I don’t think I’m an adult yet. I don’t know, in my mind I don’t think I am. I mean I appear to be, but when I was in my teenage years – I mean I’ve heard this sort of theory where I think meant – I may have grown physically, but I think I grow slowly mentally I think. Because for a while I’ve been treated like a child and I would act like a child. I was always goofing off and being silly and people just looked at me like I was a child.’ (Jasmine)
When Jasmine was asked about her acceptance of being an adult, she admitted that she actually felt like an adolescent even though she was 25 years old. Jasmine also stated how people would expect things from her because she is an adult, like finding a job or driving, which made her feel pressured and anxious. We might infer from this that Jasmine expressed feelings about her lack of power and barriers to identity. She said:
‘No I don’t think I have, no, no. I would say I was a teenager really, to be honest, yeah.’ (Jasmine)
‘I don’t know. As I’ve already said, I don’t feel like mentally I am an adult. Because when I want to go for something, like if I want to go for a driving test, because there are people around me now, they look at me, they see me physically as an adult, but I have this weird – you see, because I’m a people pleaser I get myself upset because I’m not what people want me to be and then I pressure myself in trying to do things like learn to drive or get a job. But my mum and someone else close to us stops me and says to me that you don’t have to do these things just to make yourself a more appealing person, to make yourself look like an adult.’ (Jasmine)
Furthermore, Jasmine expressed low self-esteem believing that she cannot achieve other people’s expectations of her, she is also afraid of failure and letting people down. She also continued by expressing her concerns about what others might think of her because she did not see herself acting like an adult, which creates worry because of the expectations and
perceptions of others in the community. Another concern was that she still did not feel ready for adulthood because she was not prepared for it. She said:
‘I don’t know, I’m worried that people will look at me as an adult and see who I am and think that I’m not acting, that even though I’m an adult I don’t act like an adult. They’ll wonder what is wrong with me. They’ll think I’m rather strange. So yeah, I’ve just been getting upset with people expecting more of me than I was really equipped for. I don’t feel equipped for adulthood really yet. I’m just trying to do my everyday routines, just try to keep busy, try to keep going.’ (Jasmine)
The individuals in this section talked about their worries and concerns of transitioning to adulthood, and how some of them felt they had not been accepted as adults and they still felt like adolescents or children. In particular, they mentioned that it would be helpful to be given more effective preparation for adulthood. This matter will be discussed in further details in the Discussion Chapter 7.