CH Robinson y Rápidos del Sureste Proveedor-Cliente

Yes, I married my mother first time round! (laughs). Disarm. It’s not an unusual thing to do!

I remember you know, hanging on to my mum. I remember she had long nails and I used to stick my finger…when I was young, I used to stick my fingers underneath the nails like that…Animated image; fresh; angry? De-clawing mother. which I used to like and she I think it quite hurt so she’d stop me doing it. I would have been tiny when I was…

And how did that feel to you, doing that?

I don’t know, something quite um, comforting Comfort from pressing his fingertips under mother’s nails to hurt her about it. I don’t know quite what was but it was. I remember it...

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

Fred: I think I think I used to I used to worry erm that err that when I say a happy a happy childhood I thinks that’s right, I used to worry err about what would happen to my sister and I if they they both were killed, erm for whatever reason I no no specific erm thoughts about why erm but I always had little schemes running as to what we would do, very childish quite stupid schemes I suppose I would be five erm you know we would pick the apples from the tree and sell them at the gate, we would do all of these things, (Yeah), erm err and err yeah I was I was early into commerce (laughs). Disarms to hide the fear of death (DS).

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

C4. Feigned helplessness.

Such speakers continue to engage with others to find protection and comfort. ‘Exaggeration of fear and inhibition of anger mislead others regarding the individual’s actual state with regard to danger and relationships. Neither the individual nor others are explicitly aware of how angry and competent the individual actually is behind the appearance of fearfulness’

(Crittenden, 2011, p 202). One boarding school participant had this in their classification but none from the day school group.

Debbie: I felt it was very much, we were very much put to one side and he was the important person … weren’t told about their deaths because we weren’t wanted at the funerals so we were told about their dying after the funerals. …. Couldn’t really say possibly how I felt

about things, errm... I felt she didn’t care enough about me, errm. . These are examples of luring the interviewer into feeling sorry for the speaker.

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

C5-C6 Punitively angry and obsessed with revenge.

People using this strategy, seek revenge against attachment figures. They bear grudges for a long time. The interview information is contradictory. They dismiss others and are derogatory towards them blaming others while glorifying themselves. They do not trust others because they have learned that attachment figures while appearing available and empathic then acted in unexpectedly

threatening ways. This strategy covers a range of inter-personal functioning from chronically angry to life-threatening threat, either to the self or to others and is often indicative of possible psychiatric difficulties. Evidence of this strategy is found for example, through the relationship with the interviewer in which they are made to work hard to keep the speaker engaged in the interview process and the speaker is unclear about what happened in their histories.

Two boarding school people had this strategy. The following is taken from one of the two interviews.

Sylvia:...and I suddenly saw there were the police with police dogs coming to look for me because I’d been out all day, so (chuckling) She chuckles at the memory of hiding from the police I hid in the bushes and they went very nearly enough I remember feeling totally contemptuous that the police dogs didn’t even smell me, (laughing) derogates other and laughs; gottcha and my father was furious when I came back. I can remember I stabbed my brother once erm.

Stabbed did you say?

Yes (chuckling). She laughs at the memory of stabbing him

Brother- danger I was cutting some bread and he was teasing me he-he teased me a lot he was actually pretty nasty to me, err I think he was very jealous and he was very naughty, erm and I said if you go on teasing me I will stab you and he went on teasing me and I took the

bread knife and I remember I-I cut him it didn’t go very deep but I can remember my father coming in and saying, oh it’s just missed the something or other dismisses importance with

‘something or other’ – the implication – which she minimises / brushes away - is that she missed a major artery or vein because by that time he was a doctor, erm and err I was sent to bed.

Did you ever feel very frightened or not sure that you were safe?

Well, you do feel safe at boarding school because you’ve got all these people around you, I mean when you’re institutionalised you are safe.

Mm, did you feel frightened?

No. She has mentioned being very frightened and having to be sent home because she was crying so much; this contradicts earlier sections.

I’d just been told my father was dying (chuckles) distorted positive.

‘Okay. So, we’ve got distant and we’ve got that you wanted to please her all the time. Yes.

And have you, earlier you said you idealised her. Interviewer is having to work hard.

Yes’…. ‘and I never understand why and my mother would never really tell me. Fifth mention of not knowing or not knowing why/understanding.

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

A/C, blended AC.

Some adults use both Type A and Type C strategies to defend themselves from perceived danger. They may use them in an alternating way such as C1-2 for mild threats /and A3-4 for serious threats or perhaps A3 for mother and C3 for father without consciously being aware of it. While there is no direct correlation with psychiatric diagnoses, a presentation of A/ C can indicate a disorder such as bipolar or borderline personality disorder (Crittenden, Kozlowska

& Landini, 2010). Blended AC is described as more integrated but becoming more

dysfunctional in relationships as the classification numbers become higher. Thus, the strategy of blended A7-8, C7-8 is considered to be a psychopathic presentation. Deciding whether

someone is A/C or blended AC is extremely difficult even for coders with high levels of reliability (Baim, 2017 personal communication). In the transcripts, only one of the boarding school group, Mark, was considered to be A/C, that is, he used both strategies for different people: A1-2 for Father (self-dismissing) and C1(threateningly angry) with some elements of C3 (preoccupied and angry) for mother; even though he was in the process of reorganising towards B. One of the day school group was A/C A1mother/ C5-6 father.

In describing his relationship with his parents Mark in the boarding group said:

(breathes out) . . .. I think because em the relationship with my mother difficult erm but. it was I think my mother was so needy of me erm that I put distance there, whereas it was sort of the other way round with my father, I was reaching out to him (Mmm) and felt that I feel . . more able to actually con-connect with my father erm than with my mother and I have I have always found my mother erm err hard to be around, erm and you know erm but I think that those periods of difficulty erm meant that I I think I think I feared that if I gave what she wanted it would just be too much. C1/C3 (threateningly angry).

With regard to his father:

in many respects warm and loving erm when he was there, erm but I remember him doing things for me like erm, making me a papier-mache helmet erm for for some school thing I was doing that was very impressive, it weighed a ton erm and he was very good with his hands erm…A1/2 (idealising).

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

Another example of AC from the boarding group is Jimmy who said:

Can’t think of anything really young. I can remember hitting me on the hand with a knife IMAGE OF DANGER at one point. Which wasn’t an act of violence, GDN she just happened to be holding it A and whacked connotative word – whacked - conveys the force, C. which semantically he minimises and exonerates. A. Memory systems disagree with each other me across the hand. Uh but I must have been about ten or eleven then. Credible Evidence for

anger, while minimising danger. A1-2, (idealising with some self-blame) C2 (disarmingly desirous of comfort).

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

One of the day school group used a strategy of A1/2 idealising his mother and C5/6 with his father.

Tom: Errrm, err I can remember her taking me to nursery school, err off M..n G..n in East H……d erm I can remember erm my relationship with my mum err very close erm I can remember lying on the sofa and her kind of stroking my hair, erm I can remember going to H.d Primary School on my first day and hating it and being absolutely distraught at her leaving, errm.

His relationship with his father was described as:

Erm, errm, yeah erm sense of him being distant, errm, (exhales loudly), errm, errrrr, I think there’s this I ah yeah, I recall a sense of not knowing when I good time to talk to him about something was, (Mm-m), you know to sort of get him at a good time and the whole kind of issue about that, which which was you know, a fairly distant figure that you have to make err representations.

Modifiers of the strategies

While there are basic strategies as described above, there are also experiences in life which impact on those strategies and modify them. Such modifiers are: reorganisation, depression, disorientation, intrusions of forbidden negative affect and expressed somatic symptoms.

When modifiers are present, the basic strategy has been disrupted and is indicative of the need for professional help such as therapy.

There were no examples of disorientation or expressed somatic symptoms in either group.

Reorganisation (R)

Speakers coded as reorganising, are engaged in a process of understanding how the past relates to the present without full knowledge or description of how one has led to the other. If

they had, they would be classified as B. They often have features similar to Type Bs but often fail ‘to meet Grice’s (1975) (see chapter six) maxims of quantity, (too much or too little), manner (in a distancing or involving manner) and relevance (omission of critical information or inclusion of trivial detail) are repeatedly violated. The maxim of quality, however, is rarely violated; that is, reorganising speakers do generally have evidence for what they say but when remembering dangerous events, their previous strategy is used at such times so that the Type A strategy continues to preclude the speaker from bringing valid events from the past in order to provide future predictions of behaviour and Type Cs continue to fail to leave the affect tied to past events, in the past. Thus, while there is a transition in process, there is a failure to maintain new patterns which would be indicative of a balanced speaker.

Seven of the boarding school group were in the process of reorganising from one main strategy to another at the time of interview but only one of the day school group was.

An example from Thad in the boarding group: ...again I didn’t get the sense that she was upset, or perhaps I was quite focused on how I was feeling and perhaps she was trying to be brave, I don’t know. Reflective. Both perspectives but some exoneration of mother. Possibly moving from avoidance of feelings to a more balanced approach? Then returning to A type language

but I think (using a swear word), uh, and that was the only time she hit us distancing of self and I, I think she felt bad about that, I think that was sort of her, of character, um…and and very mild. Minimising, while moving towards a balanced perspective, Thad returned to a self-dismissing style when talking about being hit.

*red font indicates coder notation. Speech is verbatim.

Depression (Dp)

Depression is used in a narrow form in the AAI in that the markers for depression exist such as frequent examples of sighing during the interview and a transferential bleakness in tone.

The speakers are aware that their usual strategy is failing but are unable to change it. Such people feel that despite having all the information they need about people and events; the self

and their actions are irrelevant to any outcome. In other words, a self-protective strategy is absent and affect is flat. Only one of the boarding school group received a classification that included depression but two of the day school group did. The sighs are indicative of

depression in the following two boarding school examples, followed by one from day school.

Charlotte: I think (sigh) there were moments the, um…when life seemed pretty dark.

Alice: ...punishment (sighs) probably you know as we as back in the day in the seventies I remember growing up they used to you know if we did anything wrong. I think they used to slap the back of our legs sort of thing errr.

Q. Okay, could you now describe your relationship with your father going back as far as