Contenedores complementares: para tirar restos de aceite, juguetes rotos y pilas.

Since Edward started college, life was very different. In our interviews in January 2015 as well as July 2016 I could hear in his voice if he was talking about St. Paul’s or college. He was much happier, felt more at home there and had finally challenging work to do.

One of the key changes seemed to be that he was treated like an adult. He was given responsibility and was granted independence in his studies. In addition to that, he mentioned that the learning atmosphere was very different at college as the people who were there wanted to be there. The A-levels Edward was taking were mathematics, further mathematics, physics and chemistry. In 2015 he mentioned that he was now also working with people who were of similar or same ability and

had the same interests and thus they got involved in discussion about work:

Interviewer: How is that, because obviously like at St. Paul’s you were top of class and now suddenly someone’s saying to you, actually now you have to work even harder, how is that for you?

Edward: I love it, I love it, I love it, I really do and having people who are similar ability or up there, a) just to talk to about problems and b) just to push you, I mean just to say, you know, here’s this problem that I’ve found, what do you think of it, how would you go about it. What was it, in break, me and Tom1_{, one of my really good friends,}

Tom’s a similar ability, brought a very funny video. So there’s a C3 exam that happened a couple of years ago and it’s somewhat infamous for being one of the hardest exams that anyone has ever seen and has nothing to do with the syllabus so everyone was furious about it. It’s a very funny video, sort of a spoof of this scene from ‘Mein F¨uhrer’ going through, it’s like, what do you mean there was [LAUGHS]. Oh very funny.

Interviewer: That sounds like you also find people around you who you can work with and so, are you the odd one out or not really any more?

Edward: I’m still somewhat the odd one out but it doesn’t feel as pronounced if that makes sense and it doesn’t feel the odd one out in the wrong way, it feels that these people are equally sort of nerdy and willing to be openly nerdy and not sort of you know, see that as a bit of a weird thing.

(Interview Edward, 20 January 2015)

What he also cherished was the fact that he could then be openly nerdy and it 1_{Name changed}

was acceptable as there were others who were similar to him. Being able to openly enjoy mathematics and have discussions about mathematical problems seemed liberating for him and also pushed him further academically. Working with people of similar ability and suddenly not always being the best anymore also helped Edward to make much more progress and feel at peace with working even harder and pushing for even better grades. Edward was also very excited about his future plans which now involved wanting to study mathematics at Cambridge University (Interview Edward, 20 January 2015). During our 2015 interview he told me that he had applied for summer school at Oxford University and when we caught up again in July 2016 he told me that he had been invited to two summer schools the year before, one of which was based on academic ability and he was one of 30 students who were chosen from 3,000 chemistry students. Again, compared to the conversation we had in July 2013, there was a change in attitude, much more positive and work focused.

Further to this, when meeting Edward again in January 2015 there was a real apparent change. He was buzzing again about his academic work. He was proud to be talking about wanting to study mathematics and aiming for a place at a highly-rated university. Edward also was not ashamed of his ability and interests anymore but celebrated and shared them with fellow students as well as teachers. He also relished the harder work and being challenged academically. One of the most significant changes he mentioned himself ‘I can tell jokes again’ (Interview Edward, 20 January 2015) which is something he lost during his last year at St. Paul’s.

But what were the biggest changes for him at college? It seems that having supportive teachers who were able to challenge him academically as well as point him to the work he needed to complete in order to get into Cambridge University. Also, having friends of a similar ability level spurred him on in his academic work and achievements and it suddenly was normal to talk about mathematical

or scientific problems or issues without being seen as strange (see the interview excerpt above). Edward also mentioned in the 2015 interview that he had a better understanding of himself and who he was because he was now able to share it with friends and other people without having to hide who he was. Realising who he was led him to accept himself for the things he liked and this of course had a positive impact on his self-theory which is the key to working hard (Dweck, 2000).

Interviewer: [. . . ] Is there also something which helped you to maybe be more you, which, thinking about the depression, isn’t that the biggest part and the biggest problem to accept who you are and to come to yourself?

Edward: Yeh, no, I really felt that, it was really having something that, sort of realising that this was kind of my hobby, what I like doing. You know everyone else has their hobby and it’s a bit, oh I really like working, it’s a bit sad isn’t it. But actually saying, no damn right, that is exactly what I love doing, I’m really interested in this stuff, this is my passion, you know. And being able to say that and being able to share that with people at college who were actually interested, genuinely you know, in what I had to say I think.

(Interview Edward, 07 July 2016)

What have I learned from Edward’s journey through secondary education and then college? Finding his place at college amongst peers, being REALLY chal- lenged academically and finding a supportive environment made a huge difference to Edward’s academic achievements but more importantly to his social-emotional well-being. At the end of Year 13, at the age of 18 years, he was cheerful again, had learned different ways of coping with his depression, namely to embrace who he was and what he liked, and overall had peers and teachers along the way sup- porting and challenging him. Edward also had a dream he was pursuing and a

college which was equipped to support him along the way. Importantly though, the teachers at college pointed him in the right direction, provided additional work but at no point spoon-fed him, a notion which Edward very much cherished while being there because it is ‘a much more adult approach to learning and to have a lot more trust put on you’ (Interview Edward, 20 January 2015).

I will finish this sub-section with an email I received from Edward on 20 August 2016, just after he had received his A-level results:

I thought it would be nice to tell you my results

i got four A*s and met my offer for Cambridge.

thank you for your time these past years,

Edward

His secondary education and college journey had come to a very positive end and his future appeared shining brightly in the distance, a wonderful end to his at times dark moments along the way.