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Xiaohua was a girl who showed no interest in pursuing higher education and was very determined to commence work after finishing education in a vocational high school. As discussed previously, she expected to have an ‘average’ future life and considered having a high school diploma was enough for her future employment; also, she viewed universities

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as places where she would be as restrained as she was in secondary schools and thus had no wish to attend them. There was also a strong sense of seeking freedom and autonomy in Xiaohua’s accounts, and such an aspiration for freedom and autonomy seems to be strongly related to her family, especially her relationship with her mother.

When talking about being a ‘left-behind child’, Xiaohua expressed how much she wished her parents could be away from home all the time as she felt much happier without them. ‘Because no one will restrict me, I’m free. They wouldn’t even let me go shopping with my friends when they are home. I hope they’re never at home’. She described the relationship with her parents like this:

My family makes me suffocated. Especially my mom, she doesn’t know much about me but she interferes in my life and restricts me way too much, and that’s annoying! Well, my dad doesn’t seem to care about what I have in mind; my mom on the contrary cares a lot but I’m not willing to share with her because she’s always too bossy… my parents don’t understand me. Actually, they are my obstacles; our relationship is estranged and I don’t want to communicate with them.

She especially expressed her discontentment with the way her mother intervened in her friendship, which appears to be the root of their tense relationship and very likely the source of her yearning for absolute freedom in the future as she believed she knew herself much better than her parents did. ‘… I want to follow myself for choices and decisions. If I think my parents are wrong, I won’t defer to them because I know myself better than they do, and I know better what is good for me.’ Although such an intervention demonstrates Xiaohua’s mother cares and is concerned about her, Xiaohua strongly disagreed with her mom’s surveillance because again she thought her mom lacked understanding of her and did not seem to want to understand her. Clearly, there is misunderstanding and

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contradiction between Xiaohua and her mother, but unfortunately, as being ‘left behind’, Xiaohua does not often have the opportunity to communicate with her mom and improve their mutual understanding of each other.

I’ve had many arguments and conflicts with my mom when she is home, because I can’t agree with the way she supervises me. She has a problem with me hanging out with my friends, she thinks my friends are bad kids only because sometimes I spend a bit more time at their place and come home a bit late, so she thinks only bad kids would keep me that long. I absolutely don’t agree! She knows nothing about my friends, how can she judge them like this? Each time if I know I would be home a bit late, I always call her and let her know, but she doesn’t understand and always blames me. She doesn’t know the importance of friendship to me, she misjudges my friends and asks me to break off with them. We just can’t communicate!

In terms of future educational choices, Xiaohua’s parents did not provide her with any specific guidance or advice other than deciding a path for her based on some very general and basic information shared among people or simply asking her to follow the teacher’s advice. This could be a result of Xiaohua’s parents having little cultural capital on which to draw to help her with such choices, considering their own limited educational experiences. However, Xiaohua also felt this was due to her parents’ lack of information about her as well as their lack of interest in knowing her own thoughts and supporting her with future plans.

My parents only meet with my class teacher at the beginning of each term, they have few opportunities to get information about my study. So in terms of future education, my mom just took what my class teacher had advised me, which is to take the vocational course for kindergarten teachers… she believed this should be my choice, not based on she knew me and my situation well so she knew this was a good choice for me; rather, it was only based on some general knowledge of being a kindergarten teacher that she heard from people, for example, it’s a good choice for girls because it’s not a tiring job. However, I don’t like to be a kindergarten teacher, though now I don’t know exactly what I want to do in the future, and I didn’t tell mom my thoughts because she won’t listen and will only think from her perspective and think what I thought is wrong… they (parents) didn’t give me guidance or suggestions, they only heard information from teachers or other people and they forced me to make my choice based on what they heard. They didn’t know my real situation and didn’t

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ask for my ideas. In general, they didn’t take the matter of making plans for my future seriously.

Xiaohua’s rejection of university could be understood by her plan of having an ‘ordinary’ life that she believed she could have without a university degree. University also did not interest her at all as she believed it to be just another school in which she would have no freedom and autonomy. For Xiaohua, as gaining freedom and autonomy in the future was extremely important and school was a place where she felt very restrained, it is then understandable why she had no aspiration for higher education when unnecessary. Xiaohua’s yearning for freedom and autonomy also seemed to be strongly related to her tense relationship with her mother who was believed to have illegitimately intervened in her life given that her mother was lacking understanding of her and did not want to understand her. When making educational choices, Xiaohua was given no specific guidance or support from her parents; and parents lacking understanding of her as well as having no interest in knowing her thoughts was what Xiaohua believed to be the reason for it.

Bohai and Ah Fuare examples of ‘left-behind children’ who experience a difficult relationship with grandparents who take the role as the main carer and guardian. For them, as being ‘left behind’, the carer/guardian-child relationship seems more relevant in understanding these young people’s educational aspirations and choices.