Bringing It All Together
You have learnt a lot today.
In fact, it will take you another 24hrs to absorb all the knowledge properly and you may even have to re-read certain chapters of this book.
In the next part of the StreetSmartDating book, I want to focus entirely on bringing all the various puzzle-pieces together and form them into an action plan.
It will only have one purpose:
To give you a ready-to-use tool so you can get an unlimited amount of phone-numbers from almost any woman you want to meet and date.
It will be as easy as ABC … and I’m not kidding.
I have narrowed it down to the core essentials so you will only be equipped with what you really need to get a
woman to like you and be attracted to you so she gives you her phone-number.
So let’s break it down…
A Step-By-Step Plan To Approaching Women
Most people think there is some magical line you can just say to a woman and she will fall head over heels for you.
If I am honest … this is true to some extent.
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But it’s not one single line … one line just gets her
hooked. If you string more of them same kind together though, THEN the magic happens: she gets attracted.
And as you already know the most important attraction is your personality.
This means you need to approach her differently, talk to her differently and even leave her differently than every other man does.
The key point to remember here is that you should not
“hit” on women like every other guy does like “Hey baby, why don’t you give me your number, but rather suck her into a stimulating conversation that is spiked with
sentences that create attraction.
Attraction isn’t a choice here remember? She will get
attracted to you instantly if you do it right, so there really is no choice.
So let’s talk about the initial approach: The best
approaches and ice breakers are structured very simple.
The simpler, the more effective they are. Have you ever tried or seen this kind of approach:
• Hey, can you help me. I was just hanging around, and …ehm … I noticed you were on your own, so is it okay if I was to like talk to you?
• Hey there … can I offer you a drink or something?
• Hi, you are really pretty. What’s your name?
• Hey, do you know what time it is? Oh ok … so how are you?
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These are all terrible lines. It’s been used a thousand times. If you are going to ask a woman for help or
offering them drinks, you are as lame as your line sounds like: AWFUL!
The best way of breaking the ice without looking like you are hitting on her is to ask for her female opinion about something.
For example, I was on the subway the other day heading to a lecture. There was a cute girl next to me, so I
approached her:
Me: Hey … what’s up? Listen I need a female perspective on this. Can you tell me why it’s impossible for women to put eyeliner on without opening their mouths?
Her: (laughing) Yeah, I’ve never really thought about that.
Me: I bet you’re one of those girls that are spending hours in front of the mirror.
Her: Tehehe, maybe.
… it was on like Donkey Kong!
What you need to learn is how to make interesting conversation about everyday dull things. Look at ways that you can turn the conversation around and tease the girl you are trying to pick up. If she is a little cold and withdrawn at first and accuses you of trying to pick her up, accuse her of approaching you and saying indecent things. If she’s still cold and unsociable after that, forget her.
As long as you avoid chat up lines, ready made
conversation openers and so on, it doesn’t matter what -- 110 --
you say, just how you say it. Be clear, slow and distinct.
Remember your voice tone. Don’t act nervous and start with anything formal or serious. Make sure that you either have a serious and relaxed approach or if you are being confident and cheeky you are relaxed and funny about it.
Say it with a little grin. No ear to ear smiles like you are trying to sell her something. Look calm and sexy.
Don’t worry about being nervous when you approach women. The key is to just do it. It doesn’t matter if you get one or two who ignore you or just aren’t interested, nobody cares and you probably wont ever see them
again. I was nervous when I started approaching women, it was all a matter of experience. When you do it and do it right there’s no way, unless she had a personality bypass, that she wont want to at least talk to you. Interesting men are literally one in a thousand, so don’t think she wont be keen to at least chat.
I can guess how you will feel. You will start feeling REALLY nervous, relax it passes. If you cant talk to women you find attractive in the street, just start talking to every woman you meet, even if you’re not attracted to her. I was doing some late night shopping in the supermarket at 1 am. The girl at the till was about 10-15 years older than me and just average looks. But I still had a quick chat with her just to get that bit extra experience. Since it was late I just said:
“How can you be so happy at 1am?!”
She smiled and said she enjoyed this time of night and couldn’t sleep anyway. All I had to do was make a couple of comments while she was putting my card in the pin machine and in just a few seconds of chat I’d boosted my confidence and improved my skill.
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Keep talking to everyone. If you are too nervous to
approach women, then work on everybody else. You see a senior citizen at the bus stop talk to them. If you are on the train and there’s a guy across from you, find out if he’s got a personality. Most people who have friends like to make new ones. I’ve found the ones that don’t, aren’t very interesting. If you talk to people it will help you prepare for the jump of moving from just seeing women and then actually approaching them to talk.
If you feel just a little nervous, then by all means, just go right on in there and talk to attractive women. The only way you will ever become good at it and become instantly attractive is if you keep practicing. And remember,
nothing terrible is going to happen to you, even if you think it will. The worst that will happen is a few girls might not respond very well to you, forget them and move on.
Okay, let’s put everything you have learned so far into a system you can use right off the bat.
All those puzzle pieces I have revealed for you are about to come together.
The first step now is to go to places that are crowded with women which shouldn’t be too hard. Now, you see a very attractive woman just a couple yards away from you that you really want to meet.
What do you do?
Yes, you have to get your butt over there and start with a line.
The problem here is that once a guy spots a beautiful woman and is about to walk over … he stalls.
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His feet just don’t want to move. His stomach starts to tense, he gets nervous and just stands there until the opportunity is gone.
Why do you get nervous?
The real reason isn’t because you aren’t confident, don’t know what to say or that you are afraid you will get rejected and make a fool out of yourself.
It’s because you don’t know what will happen!
You just don’t have a clue how she will react. So in other words, you do not have the experience to calmly walk over there and say a line that you have used in the past with great success.
If you have used one line at least 10 times with women already and KNOW how a woman will respond once you say it, that shitty feeling in your stomach will go away!
So here’s what I want you to do: Whenever you see a woman and you can’t think of nothing cheeky to say to create attraction, use a default line.
A default line is, in most cases asking for her opinion about something.
This way you are just talking and it doesn’t look like you are hitting on her. You will also avoid the boring “Yes” or
“No” answers and suck her into a stimulating conversation.
Okay…
So here’s what I want you to do when you see a beautiful woman:
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1. Walk over and plant yourself next to her
2. Say “HEY” to make her turn around and to get your attention. (don’t tap her on the shoulder, ever!) 3. Wait for her to look you in the eyes, wait for 2
seconds, say “Hi…” …wait another 1-2 seconds to let your bodylanguage do some magic here (using pauses in sentences helps big time).
4. Say: Listen … I’ve heard, that woman can only put on mascara … when their mouth is open. [pause] Is that true? *cheeky smile*
5. Now she is hooked but wait for her response and heat up the attraction immediately with…
6. So what about you? Are you a real girlie girl and you spend what … how many hours in front of the mirror?
7. Just keep teasing, busting her balls and create attraction until she asks for your name.
The mascara line is one of the most effective ones I ever came up with, so you can use it today and get 9 out of 10 women hooked right away.
You see, by giving you a killer line like this that I have tested already and is guaranteed to work for almost
anybody to break the ice, I will take away all your fear of approaching.
I know it works, and once you see that it works so incredibly well, there is nothing that can stop you.
Here are two more examples of killer default lines I use almost every time:
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• Hey, listen … I need your opinion about something.
See… [pause] would you ever get some guys name tattooed on your body? Get this … my little sister met this dude who is like 30 years older than her …
• Hey, I need your opinion about something … does moisturizing as a man make gay or just
metrosexual?
After you broke the ice, all you need to do is keep
pressing her emotional trigger buttons, accusing her of whatever, teasing her, busting her balls and generally just creating more attraction.
Then after only 2-3 minutes, she will be ready to give you her number.
How To Get Her Number
Ah, the phone-number.
What is the best way to get a woman’s phone number? I’ll show you:
What you need to do first is pushed her Emotional Trigger Buttons for about 3-5 minutes (rough estimate with
mediocre-good skills) by creating attraction, making her laugh etc.
Then you cut the conversation short and tell her you need to run. Example:
“Hey listen, I really need to run and get this sorted out before the mall closes, but we should continue this
conversation. Here, tell ya what … let’s swap number …”
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Then you hand her your cell-phone and let her type in her number. Don’t wait for her to agree or say something when you say “swapping numbers” … just do it!
She will know what to do anyway, but most of all you need to lead! If you do, she will follow. And this is one fine example of what happens when you lead: She will take your phone and type in her number right away.
The key here is to not let her answer or take charge, but to just TAKE her phone number without asking for it.
But watch out here:
If she says “Why don’t you give me YOUR number and I call you?” your spidey-sense should be tingling and the alarm bells ringing!
This is a test! Don’t fall for it.
It is the most common test women pull right before they give you their phone number. They need to see if you are the real deal or just another nice guy who will eventually waste their time if she goes on a date with you.
Nice guys will always fail this one and hand out their phone number without taking hers. Women know that, and they also know that they will NEVER call if a guy gives out his phone number without getting hers.
Women never ever call a guy the first time, that’s a man’s job.
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Always make sure that you either trade them, or only take hers. But from experience please double-check if the number she gave you is the right one by calling her cell.
Sometimes she will give you a fake one to get rid of you (meaning you made a mistake in the beginning or didn’t create enough attraction), or simply can’t remember hers correctly and made a mistake (it can happen, I can’t
remember my number either *lol*).
Another way of getting a number real quick is to make the transition to the date immediately, such as
“Hey, whatchya doing tomorrow? I need to go to town/the mall/whatever … you can keep me company if you’re nice.
Here, type in your number and we’ll sort something out.”
This is a better way if you want to smoothen out the transition process from the call to setting up the date.
By making an indication towards get together in the very near future, you already lead her towards the initial date which will make it easier for you when you eventually call her.
But once you have her number in your cell, get the hell out of there.
LEAVE!
Don’t stick around, just hit the road, seriously! Say “it was nice meeting you ... I give ya a call and then we can sort something out, okay? Cya then” and just leave.
Don’t kiss her, don’t hug her or say “you’re really nice, I hope we can go on a date”.
No, no, no!
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Just get outta there before you mess something up.
Before I forget, here is some more general knowledge about getting the phone number and background
information you should know.
Whatever the conversation is about, if its going well just press for her phone number. This is a step up from
approaching a woman, but if you are talking and she seems interested, then go ahead and just TAKE her number. Don’t ask, just take it.
She will not only gladly give it to you if she’s attracted to you (giggles, smiles, laughing, hits you on the arm), she is probably just waiting for you to ask for it. The longer you hang around and try to tip toe around the number, she will think you don’t have the guts and confidence to just ask or go for it.
In fact, she WANTS you to ask her for her number so she can give it to you. She does want to, but it is you who needs to make the move.
If you don’t go for it, she will think “hmm, maybe he just wanted to chat…what a pitty, I would have given him my number”.
Don’t just beat about the bush, ask for it! Maybe you were asking her about eyeliner and you can drop this into the question. Also, break the conversation up in the
middle of things going well, just like with a phone conversation with a girl you’ve been out with:
“Look, I gotta go and finish off this essay/work
(whatever). How we continue this conversation tomorrow or something. Here, type in your number and I’ll sort something out.”
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Just be straight and forward about it and she is bound to give you her number.
Another point I would like to make here is that it is also possible to hand her a piece of paper and a pen … but this is soooo out of date. This isn’t Hollywood where the
woman hands you her phone number on a small napkin written in lipstick. This is the 21st century and everybody has a cell-phone these days. If she gives you her landline number … don’t bother.
If she says she doesn’t have a phone … call her on it. It’s a test.
If she says she just moved house … same deal.
Just hand her your cell and let her type in her digits from her cell-phone, ring it once to confirm and you got
yourself a date!
The Call
Once you got her number, call her the next day. But if you are new to this, I would give it 1 day in between
before you call … just to let her know that you are hard to get and not a needy wimp.
The most important rule you have to remember when calling a woman is keep it short!
I know it is very seductive to let her emotions go and just keep talking for over 15 minutes.
If you do this, you enter danger-zone!
The purpose is not to talk to her on the phone for hours and create some more attraction there … it’s to get her to meet you again.
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So you give her a quick call, make her laugh a little bit, fluff for 2-3 minutes and then CUT the conversation short again just like you did when you got her number.
Tell her that you need to go do X in town and that she should meet you at 2pm or whatever.
Don’t say:
Do you want to go have a drink sometime
• Do you want to…like…hang out?
• Do you want to have dinner with me?
You have to stick to what works here: Create some small attraction, just by small talk. Ask her how she has been and what she has been doing. Don’t go into a lot of detail, just pick up on the important things she says and make a cheeky or funny comment about them.
Finish the conversation by saying that you have to go and do something, even if you want to talk to her. This will help her to see that you are not needy or obsessed with her. This way you will come off as a challenge and as hard to get.
Avoid pauses and hesitation and repeating yourself. If at any point you don’t know what to say, or you run out of
Avoid pauses and hesitation and repeating yourself. If at any point you don’t know what to say, or you run out of