Deida. It's huge, and not as easy as it sounds.
You have to *actually*
• enjoy • appreciate • and explore
Her entire body. Or it doesn't work.
That is - you can't fake this stuff, and it will take time to reach this point. It's progressive though, so relax and have fun messing up and getting possibly a little negative feedback. So what does this mean?
It can mean a lot of different things. For me personally, it means to almost literally "examine" her entire body. The more senses you use, the better.
Be curious, almost like a child. Don't ignore anything.
From her back, to her neck, to her ears down her arms, all the way to her finger tips, and back again. Kiss her where she won't expect it, smell her hair before you give her ear a quick nibble, feel her breathe deeply, and let her feel yours.
Pay attention to anything like a mole or birthmark as well. It's important that you
• enjoy • appreciate • and explore
Her entire body.
Re-read that in case you missed it.
This also means you don't get hung up on one particular area. This does not mean jump around like a nervous middle schooler on his first date. It means you're not focusing
(physically or mentally) on one particular area too long.
For the record though, a few areas that will usually take their breath away...
• triceps
• sides of breasts (careful with this one. Easy to get
caught up on if you love boobs)
• quadriceps
• upper hamstrings (right below the ass; use wisely) • neck (somewhat, but not as much as the above 4)
I know some of you are thinking..."quads, really?"
Yep, not even kidding. Largest bone in our bodies has plenty of muscle to massage. Don't be shy. More importantly, she'll be pretty surprised when you reach there, and become even more surprised when she feels the sensation from your hands. And yes, going for the legs is a great idea. Massaging the feet will depend on the girl; some are into it, some hate it, some will just totally not care where you're hands go after a point ;). Part 2- Be present, and focus on the now.
This part sounds really simple, and is, but that does not make it easy for most. You have to let go of the mental noise and mind identification. When you do this 100%, you'll know it, and so will she (and she'll be loving every minute of it).
Ultimately, it leads back to the previous points:
• enjoy • appreciate • and explore
You can not consciously do these if you aren't fully present then and there. No if's, and's or butts about it.
Being present is your greatest gift to women, and it takes a massage to a whole new level. It keeps you slow, calm, and focused on the 3 points, which will really drive her nuts, and usually turns out great for the both of you.
Another thing she'll sense is that you lose the outcome dependence of the night. That is, being present and truly focusing on the massage makes what happens later, completely irrelevant on a deep level. Sure, you're both probably getting horny while this is going on, but it doesn't matter. That's after the fact, and it will usually take care of itself if you can just let go.
Read up on giving a massage if you're not presently too good with it, and you can conspicuously place an erotic massage book on your coffee table and say it was a gift from an ex. If she opens it open and seems eager, this is an IOC. You may want to have massage oil around, though it can be messy and is not needed.
A lot of girls like foot massages, but you probably should ask first, since some don't. In some cases, rubbing a girl's dirty stinky feet can look try- hard and is a DLV. So probably the feet aren't a good place to start.
During the massage you can get more and more intimate, though you may wish to avoid her genitals unless it's clear she's ready for S1. Going for petting when she isn't ready can lead to buyers remorse, though at the moment she is enjoying the feeling.
Your goal will be to start kissing the back of her neck and shoulders, and if she is receptive (moaning and slow wriggling are good IOCs to look for), you can try to get her on her back and proceed to S1.
Dual-Induction Massage (Style)
This technique was developed to permit menages (threesomes). Bring a primary girlfriend and a new woman to your seduction location and distract them with a benign activity like watching a movie. Tell the women that you just learned a new massage technique: when someone feels two hands on them they can zone out, but when there are four hands the brain completely freaks out and it opens up a whole new experience. Have the primary lie down and take her top off, and you and the new girl massage her back in a similar fashion. After a while, take your shirt off and allow the two girls to massage you. Then, have the new girl remove her shirt while you and your primary massage her back. You and your primary begin to make out, very low so the new girl feels the sexual energy, then turn the new girl's head and begin to kiss her. Then the primary and new girl should begin to kiss, at which point the game is on.
Butts
Women are attracted to a man's rear end. Specifically, the three areas of a man's body that women find sexually appealing are the legs, butts and chest/arms, with butts barely winning out at 40%. This may be because a
strong gluteus implies deeper penetration which may lead to greater odds of impregnation. In S1 or S2, it may be wise to focus a girl's attention to your rear.
Slapping a girl's butt is a very dominating alpha move. Besides causing a sudden sexual rush, it demonstrates your confidence. Girls often don't mind slapping the butt of a man they just met, and you can bait her to do this.
Earring Kiss Gambit (Decibel)
Works to get a first kiss if the two of you are sitting on a couch, maybe watching TV.
You: Hey, do you have ear piercings? (she shows you the ear on your side, you touch her ear). Hmm...let me see the other ear. (she turns her head towards you to show her other ear, at which point you kiss her).
J the Ripper's Makeout and Fingerbang Techniques * Part One: The Makeout
After running game on her, calibrate so that you don't stab too early; if you've been gaming for any length of time you'll know exactly when to execute it:
"Well it was awesome talking with you. It's so cool to come to a place like this and meet someone who's not your average ditsy club chick. You're really different. I wish we could chill & hang out the whole night. Listen, I have to go, and we're probably never gonna see each other again.” (act a little disappointed). “But I want to keep in touch with you. Give me your number.” (After you the get the number, tell her you'll call her, and give her a big hug. While in the hug, whisper in her ear, "So are you a good kisser, or do you just look like one? Lets find out." And just go for it.)
Alternatively use: "You know, we're probably never going to see each other again...but I have an idea. Hear me out, it's nothing perverted or nasty...Do you like secrets? Here's what I want you to do. Walk down to that end and turn the corner so your friends can't see, and I'll follow close 20 seconds after. We'll kiss once, then you go back to your friends, I'll go back to mine and then like I said, we'll probably never see each other again. It'll be our cool little moment, our little secret."
* Part Two: The Fingerbang
After you take her to the dance floor, run heavy attraction material (check out my past FR/LR's for examples), then transition to selling the fuck out of "Tourist Mentality" using my oldie line:
"You know, we're probably never going to see each other again...”
The idea behind tourist mentality is that you convey the fact tonight may be the last time you see each other, and that whatever happens this night doesn't "actually count". This makes her more willing/accepting that she can exhibit "bad girl" actions and yet not be held accountable for it. Once you're making out, put one hand snug behind her waist, and the other behind the neck where the hair ends, and do an evolution phase shift hair pull.
If she's receptive up to this point, test the waters by placing your hand gently between her thighs, and tease your fingers almost coming close to her ******, but not quite. If she lets you do that with no hesitation, take baby steps with your hands until you can reach up and under. Once your hand is inside the elastic trim, begin to kiss her harder, and tug hair slightly firmer but not too hard, and act quick with your middle finger, sticking it in (your index and ring finger used to separate the lips and help guide the way). Once your finger is in, I like to kiss her neck. At this point, drop your hand from her hair to her waist, but keep kissing. The kissing is pretty much a distractor from your hands.
Birthday Kiss (Decibel)
'Hey, do you think your boyfriend would mind if you gave me a birthday kiss?'
This can be used early in attraction if her BT is up, you've got kino compliance and think you might be able to pull off a kiss. For example, a girl passes you on her way to the bathroom and she seems friendly, drunk and willing to comply. It doesn't need to be your birthday, nor does her BF need to be present; it simply presupposes she has a BF somewhere in the world. It also assumes she is willing to kiss you, as opposed to 'hey, it's my birthday, how about a kiss?'
Palmistry
This is a great way to introduce more seductive kino, and is discussed in the Chick Crack chapter.
Verbal Kino (Decibel)
A woman can be sexually stimulated by the words you use, and avoiding sexual topics during day 1 is a common AFC mistake. Mystery has warned that talking about sex can project neediness, so this tactic should only be done once your delivery is confident and non-needy. Physical kino may not fully arouse her if the 'verbal kino' as I call it isn't there. Whenever a window opens to lead the convo gently in the direction of sex, you should consider leading it there. Even if a topic seems asexual, there are ways to bait the target so she will begin a sexual convo, many times a very explicit one. Talk non-chalantly about fuck buddies, different sexual techniques you're knowledgeable about or interested in exploring, and demonstrate you are totally non-judgmental about sexual adventures and practices. You must bring her ASD down because women are typically afraid of being considered sluts. Do research. Read 'girly' magazine like Cosmo and Vogue to understand their content and lingo. Go to sites that sell vibrators and other sex toys, read reviews of the products, be able to discuss these things with authority even though you may have personally never used these items. You may be surprised just how willing most women are to talk about sex in graphic detail, once you show you are accepting of and unphased by anything they throw your way.
Will You Feed Me? (Style)
If you want to bounce from a venue to a girl's house, tell her 'I can come home with you...but do you promise to feed me?' This provides a subtext for going home with her to lower her ASD. When she starts listing items in her fridge she can feed you, you're in. Pick something from the list, and then bounce to her place for a late-night snack, followed by escalation.
Fuck Invitations (FIs) (Decibel)
At times, you will meet a woman who is out in the club clearly looking to get laid. As you game her, she quickly complies, gives reverse kino, reopens you later and makes sexually suggestive comments directed at you. In certain cases, these
are shit tests and should be handled with care so as to not appear needy or overly compliant. But often, these invitations to fuck are genuine, and over-gaming her can kill the invitation. Often, the recipient of the FI is a Nice Guy. Being the Nice Guy doesn't get you laid. The Nice Guy will miss FIs, or may hear them not know how to act on them. Don't suffer from Nice Guy Syndrome. Step up and be a man.
FIs are counter-intuitive to social conditioning; a girl asking a man for sex can be seen as slutty, while in fact it may just indicate she's got high self-esteem and goes for what she wants.
Nice Guys will think she's just playing around and will miss the actual invitation she's giving him. Nice Guys will joke or totally disregard the FI. After all, it seems too good to be true, right? And so, an easy lay is lost.
Dial up your FI detector when out in field. And if there's mutual attraction, do act on the FIs. Be direct. Even if you've been coy and indirect to that point, it's ok to shift gears and telegraph your sexual intent. You can caveman or say 'You and I need to get out of here...right now.' It's clear by this you don't mean 'let's go to Denny's for pancakes,' but it also isn't smarmy or needy. It's perceived as dominant, which is what she's looking for. If she declines, then she's either not horny enough and needs more work, or else she's all talk and just looking for validation. Women who are truly giving you FIs help work the logistics to pull and reasonably comply with escalation.
And don't overgame this one. If she hands you her puss on a silver platter...eat up.
The Whisper
After you've gotten attraction, lean in to speak softly into the girl's ear about something. Test her compliance to see if she'll also speak into your ear or reciprocate. You can carry out an entire conversation in this fashion, which is intimate and creates a bubble around you and her. The whisper brings you a step closer to the make-out.
Sexualization (Decibel)
You can run textbook game, and even have reasonably good kino compliance, but to get her sexually intrigued you must sexualize the
conversation. This is a critical skill for SNLs and helpful for getting women responsive for day 2s. In sexualizing the convo, you are not necessarily talking about sex, but baiting her to open up about it. However, if there is a window to sexualize by directly stating your sexual intent, sexualization permits you to do this as well.
It is recommended you and your wings do the following exercise, called sexualizing the conversation. Your wing makes a non-sexual comment or asks a question and your response sexualizes it.
Example, a girl asks: Do you like dogs?
You say: Yes, I have a dog. They’re good for snuggling, but women are better. Once I woke up and something was licking my foot. I thought it was my dog but it turned out it was my girlfriend.
Example, a girl shows you her tattoo.
You say: Cool. Do you have any piercings too? I dated one girl with a nipple piercing, which was fun. But one of my girlfriends had a piercing 'down there.' Now THAT was interesting. Do you have a clit piercing?
Example, a girl brings up reading.
You say: I’m half-way through My Secret Garden. It’s about all the sexual fantasies women have. I’m sure you know, women are way more sexual than men, but our society forces them to repress their drives.
The points you want to hit are:
► Preselection. You have a lot of chicks in your life.
► Impulsiveness. Sometimes it’s best to let your emotions guide you. ► Being non-judgmental. You love sex, and love women who love sex. ► Adventurous/experimental
► Passionate
► Sexually experienced. You know much more than the average dude how to please a woman.
► Giving is better than receiving. If you satisfy a woman as your main goal, she will naturally try harder to satisfy you.
► Honesty. If it’s sex you want, be direct and own it. No games allowed.
► Unattached/NSA sex is perfectly fine. There are no expectations for commitment here.
► Being decisive: knowing what she wants and going for it
► Some aspect about her is sexy, calibrating if needed ('Your English accent is sexy. Not as sexy as Australian, but sexy.')
Each of the above are little bricks that come together to build the house of Sexuality. Women love to talk about sex; many times once they start talking about it, it's like a runaway train and you may spend the rest of the encounter discussing it. They may say they aren’t into your polygamous lifestyle, or will appear disinterested, but it’s a shit test. They’ve been so conditioned by society to appear proper, but given the chance (with an experienced, non-judgmental man) they’ll open way up. The key is for her to be doing most of the explicit talking and for her to be getting more excited than you are; the subcom is sex is no big deal for you. Using charged words like 'passionate' and 'deep, deep connection' can help get girls to start chasing you.
Watch Decibel explain Sexualization.
The Tickle
Anytime during your interaction with a girl, ask her if she's ticklish, then start to tickle her. This is easy to employ while you give a shoulder/back rub. Likewise, start tickling without giving her any warning. Tickling a girl causes her to feel like a kid again, and may result in a large BT spike while you escalate. She may comply by telling you where on her body she's ticklish, or start reverse kino by trying to tickle you.
Kissing
Many call kissing a 'kiss close' or 'k-close' but more accurately, kissing is not a close so much as just another step in kino escalation leading to sex. The actual kiss is a learned art, but where many guys have more trouble is