group member. The author did not live in the West Philadelphia, University City region, and therefore, technically was not a part of that community and neighborhood. The reason for her choosing this location and community was because of the fact that there were many new Chinese mothers living there, and it was also within close proximity to the church she had been a member of. Aside from the church providing the venue of the author’s program for free, it was also because as a member, she felt compelled to serve the community that the church served. And therefore, although not living in that community, the author chose to be active in it. The challenge of not being physically present in the community other than the time of the program meant that, aside from the time spent in the program, it would be difficult for the author to establish a more personal relationship with the group members, and it could result in lack of understanding of their life and their needs. Since the Chinese community has always been a relationship based one, and in order to gain access to a particular community, one would have to either gain it through a personal relationships or through a third party within the community.
Therefore, the author used as many opportunities as possible, such as volunteering in the community or in church activities to get to know the mothers. Although the author could not be a physical neighbor, she refused to be a stranger.
Although this was a non-clinical group, the author believed that the activities in each of the meetings had therapeutic effects. As a dance movement therapy professional, the author is the one that had more professional counseling and observation skills. Her job was to guide the pace of development of the activities as well as the discussion topics through observing the group dynamics. Then the author would use movement to help the mothers in the group to express themselves and the whole process greatly helped her
grow professionally. The author expressed great appreciation to these mothers for their trust in and support of a still training therapist. They were giving her the opportunity to practice what she learned in school. At the same time, the author felt tremendous pressure, this being her first time creating a movement-based activity outside of practicum. Also, as a much younger mother with less life and professional experience as her group members did, the author feared not performing to the group’s expectations and inability to establish the appearance of a leader among them. The latter fear was due to the seniority aspect of the Chinese hierarchical system, since age and social status play a large factor in deciding authority figure. And as the initiator of the group and activities, the author would often need to assure the direction of the activities, and design them using more preparation, all in hopes of accomplishing her own expectations for this activity and change these mothers for good.
Therefore, the author valuated her role as the group’s leader as well as her identity as a therapist. She believed that her role in the community engagement had always been a leader while acting as a helper, while enabling these mothers, guiding them to autonomy within the group, especially those who were reluctant to become the leader to direct the group. Also, the author is at the same time a participant of the program, who could be seen as the one willing to break the ice and invite conversation when everyone else felt shy or did not establish a sense of security within the group.
It may also be because the author was one of the participants that she felt that she had also received much mental support, reduced stress, increased self-expression, and gained friendships through this program. Usually the author would participate in the group activities with her child. One reason was that she wanted to constantly be with her
child, not wanting to separate for a minute. Another reason was that her child liked seeing other children. And although this group was meant for mothers, the author’s son had shown positive reactions and interest in creative arts activities such as dancing and music. However, during the few closed-group sessions, the author chose not to bring her son because she could then be more focused and engaged in the group activities. Her special role in the group increased her level of engagement and would lead to more positive effects for the group activities. The author did state that although she loved to spend time with her son, by having him there, she would be easily distracted. Sometimes, one of the author’s family members would be present during the group activities, and their main purpose was to take care of the author’s son, while also getting to see and experience what their child/grandchild and wife/daughter-in-law was participating in and who were they participating with. It has always been the author’s intention to create the sense of safety for the group. This interdependent relationship had seldom been seen in the Western culture, and these mothers have all known this difference quite well. If the mothers could express these situations through their activities, they would not need to feel ashamed or regret to have not assimilated into the culture yet. And to see this group being run in a not-so-efficient manner (mothers looking after their children, family members, elders etc.), truly conveys a sense of safe, substantial, and natural environment. And in the author’s view, these were more important than efficiency.