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subtheme demonstrates a connection between the generational paradigm shift described above; a movement away from binary views of sex and gender and toward authenticity in fluidity. While participants were asked directly what it would be like to live in a world without gender, their responses turned this question on its head, and ultimately prompted meaning around what it would be like to live in a world without conditional harm and judgement. In other words, disharmony is situated in the external judgment being thrust upon them, rather than from within their trans masculine identity.

Themes of generational change were not anticipated to emerge from this question, nor was it planned that responses would map well with generational change. Participants were surprised, almost bewildered by this question, perhaps since participants have spent an incredible amount of time in their lives contemplating gender. Therein lies a paradox of how gender has been a central and guiding principle in participant lives, but experiences throughout have revealed a need to carve out their own space to free themselves from confines, threats, stigma and pressure to conform. Participants ultimately expressed joy, excitement, and optimism in their

responses. Participants described ways a world without conditional harm would undoubtedly alter their experiences, yet agreed their internal core sense of self would remain unaltered. For example, Participant 7 equated a world without gender with an “ideal world,” and explained that he would not change as a person, but his contextualization may shift:

I think in an ideal world, we wouldn't necessarily have binaries like that. I think it's hard for things so opposite to be healthy when they've been rooted in all of that stuff. I think, ideally, not having gender stereotypes or experiences would be the ideal world… In an ideal world where no one is expected to conform to any societal standards or anything like that… like if masculinity and femininity did not exist, I don't think

dysphoria would exist, because it is largely a societal pressure to conform. I could learn to love my body if I didn't see, you know, woman in it. Just, like, my body exists, and it works, and that's all I need. But in a society where my body is immediately gendered without my consent, then I think that's where dysphoria comes from, and that's where trans identity ultimately springs out of.

Similarly, Participant 2 contemplated what a world without gender would mean for him:

World without gender. Hmmm. I think I would probably still feel male, but is that even a thing in that scenario? Yeah, like if there is no gender… I… huh (laughs). I feel like I would still feel how I feel on the inside. Like, this feels like such a strong thing that I know. I feel it doesn’t really change that. In a world without gender. I would probably still want to be in a body that feels most comfortable physically. Which is male. So, I think I’d still want to [medically] transition. I feel like in a world without gender, people would probably care less, so I think it would be easier… less fear.

In response to a world without gender, Participant 4 attributed meaning in labels:

Without gender or without labels? I don't think I would overcompensate. I think I would be stable enough to just exist, only because it wouldn't be mandatory to put a label on it. It wouldn't be mandatory to have a gender, or to say you don't have a gender. It wouldn't be mandatory to have to be this or that. So my body would not feel like it needs this gender, or it needs this label to feel adequate, or to feel validated… Masculine.

Masculinity. Masculine man. Trans. Black. African-American. US citizen. It’s just basic labels to describe yourself in your state of being in this world.

For Participant 5, their gender identity and expression would likely stay the same, but considered a world without gender to mean a world without violence and harm:

violence. It’s made me care about this topic so much... made me who I am. It’s like, my passion is gender and teaching people about gender and understanding transness. I’ve grown up my whole life being taught trans is wrong and having people police my gender and all that… who knows. I don't think I would be the same person.

I think my gender identity would stay the same. I think where I fall on the spectrum and how I express my gender would probably still be the same... or really close. There is that element of having to lean into masculinity in order to maneuver the world, too, so… Maybe I'd be even more middle of the road. Maybe I feel comfortable not wearing my binder some days, you know?

Participant 6 echoed the meaning derived by Participant 5 in stating: “My identities would be the same…I would be the same, but my life experiences would have been different,” (p. 4).

Participant 8 concurred, offering specific examples of how their life experiences may have been different, and the effect of a world without conditional harm on multiple oppressions:

Well, I'm pretty sure I'd still identify the same way, but I probably have more friends. I probably wouldn't have as many mental health issues. I don't think I would have as many difficulties socializing as I do. I don't think there would be as much stigma around any other type of mental health… I think society would just be better, because in order for there to be the attitude to eliminate the idea of gender, then a lot of the other crap that people have to deal with wouldn't have been thought of in the first place. So I think overall society would just be much better… I'm white so this might not be my place, but I don't think racism would be as bad, because a lot of it is socially constructed. Where the idea that one group of people is superior to another group of people can also be tied into the same idea behind gender.

Participant 9 shared the view that many things about him would be the same, but hardships imposed upon him externally would allow for more meaningful relationships:

To be honest I think a lot of things for me would be the same. I would still have

depression and be kind of an outsider, but I think that maybe I would be more accepted by other people. Maybe I would have more friends. Maybe it would be easier for me to make friends, because people are being more true to themselves, and there would be a lot less misogyny. I think maybe sexual and romantic experiences would have been a bit different for me.

Participant 10 ascribed meaning in the context of their work with human remains:

There would definitely be less for me to think about. Yeah, I'm sure as humans we would think of some other way to classify all this stuff. But I think it would be pretty cool. It would be a whole… another way to think about it, in terms of the bones [laughs].

Participant 11 thought of a world without gender as liberating, enriching, and safe:

That'd be nice. It would be liberating. It would be freeing. I would love just going out of my house all the time, and just looking at all the trans people in the world. That would be beautiful. I would never be afraid to go anywhere, Like the hospital or go to the doctor, or anywhere. Yeah that would be nice.

Participant 12 asserted meaning in how assumptions about his identity and pressure to conform would be absent, reiterating the idea of liberation. His narrative also demonstrated ways participants sometimes used the term transition to specifically denote medical intervention(s), just as it is largely conceptualized within cisgender frameworks. This is in light of data

supporting participants view of transition as a multifaceted and ongoing process when making meaning through a trans masculine optic:

If we lived in a world without gender, and no one ever knew what gender was and everybody just did their thing... that would be crazy and awesome! I think it would be so different because guys wouldn't be thinking that they have to play football and wear freaking Levi's jeans. They could go and be like Jaden Smith. Awesome! Who knows what my life would be like, especially since I'm masculine but I'm definitely flamboyant. I definitely wouldn't be wearing no skort or nothing, but I feel like just personality-wise I wouldn't be so quick to be perceived as gay. There we go.

If anything, I would have been more aware of myself… Even if [medical] transitioning was a thing in that world or not… well I feel like it wouldn't, because if gender didn't exist, then I would have never transitioned because it wouldn't be a thing. That's a crazy question! I don't know, man. I don't know what it's like to live in that amazing world. I'm praying for it. I don't know, I would just be me.