INFRACCIONES Y SANCIONES

their particular moment of change. There were 10 categories of the particular

moments of change in couple therapy. Except for about 4% of the respondents (n=2)

who noticed only one category, the rest of the respondents noticed more than two

categories.

Table 13. Analysis of the client’s particular moment of change in couple therapy (%)

Category Respondents

(N=35)

Started talking to each other, accepting and understanding what each other said (n=26) 74.3 Stopped blaming each other (n=25) 71.4 Found a new direction from their difficulties or conflict (n=14) 40

Made a decision (n=7) 20

Released physical sensation or pain (n=4) 11.4 Took responsibility (n=22) 62.9 Expressed their feelings (n=23) 65.7 Accepted both good and bad (n=19) 54.3 Listened empathically to the partner’s feelings (n=24) 68.6 Accepted new alternatives (n=18) 51.4

The analysis of the data revealed that more than 60% of the answers

(n=35) in the client’s particular moment of orderly change was ‘started talking to each other, accepting and understanding what each other said’ (74.3%), ‘stopping blaming each other’ (71.4%), ‘listened empathically to the partner’s feelings’ (68.6%), ‘expressed their feelings’ (65.7%), and ‘took responsibility’ (62.9%). However, these were not separate processes in couples’ particular moment of change but simultaneously and sequentially they happened to the couples because

most of the respondents answered more than two questions. In other words, the

couples at the same time start talking to, understanding and stop blaming each

other, and they can listen empathically to the partner’s feelings expressed so that they can take responsibility and accept both good and bad. It seems likely that

‘starting talking to each other, and accepting and understanding what each other said’ is related to the data in Table 11 which indicate that couple therapists do encourage couples to communicate through listening, empathising and reflecting

back. There is the suggestion here that how couple therapists worked with couples

influences the way the couples change. The particular moments of change in couple

therapy can be summarised in the following:

▪ Started talking to each other, accepting and understanding what each other said.

▪ Stopped blaming each other.

▪ Listened empathically to the partner’s feelings. ▪ Expressed their feelings.

14) Summary

The absence of any single predominant orientation in the respondents’

answers is a notable feature of the survey of general couple therapy presented in

this chapter. They have used various theoretical orientations in their work.

Moreover, the results of this survey signify that couple therapists are moving

towards integration in working with couples, mixing and combining more than one

theoretical orientation in their work. Since human issues are complex, they can

neither be understood nor resolved by simply finding an intervention formula that

can be equated with a particular issue.

60 (n=21) % of the respondents worked with couples for fewer than 10

These couple therapists tend to work short term. In these sessions most of the

couple therapists will have dealt with couple’s issues with both partners, as is characteristic of couple therapy. According to the result of this survey, however,

couple therapists may have met just one partner for practical reasons, such as only

one of the partners came to the counselling, one of the partners wanted one-to-one

sessions, or the couple therapist having a special reason to see just one partner.

Therefore, the result of the survey is that although most of those therapists worked

with two partners it was inevitable that they might sometimes see only one partner.

The survey suggests that most of the couple therapists do not identify

solving the presenting problem as a goal of the therapy. Couple therapy aims at

better interaction between the partners. The chances of increasing flexibility of

interaction in the relationship are therefore believed to be linked to increasing the

overall positivity in the relationship on the one hand and to decreasing the overall

negativity on the other hand, teaching problem solving and communication skills,

lessening the conflict between the partners, bettering the partner’s individuation, and widening their capacity for empathy, intimacy and sexuality. These are

generally, but not always, the goals of couple therapy, since couple therapists work

with human beings who are complex and have different types of issues in various

situations. This fact is highlighted by Pinsof (1995), who claimed that the

difficulties encountered by clients are not just in one place but they are in several

places.

As mentioned above, couple therapy manifests some movement toward

integrative practice. The survey suggests that most of the couple therapists used

mixed and combined techniques, which they tended to apply in their work,

regardless of their theoretical orientations. Reflecting back and homework tasks

were the most popular techniques of couple therapists mirrored in the result of the

Each of the empirically-supported orientations in couple therapy

proposes specific processes, techniques or procedures of change. This chapter has

demonstrated how in the view of couple therapists, couple therapy works to some

extent. Regardless of the orientation, two ways of working with couples have

emerged. The couple therapists either (1) encouraged the couples to do something,

such as encouraging them to communicate or to specify what behaviour they would

like to see more of in each other, or (2) facilitated collaborative conversation for

each of the partners by speculating aloud about what each may be thinking and

feeling. The couple therapists were also more active in working with couples than

they would be with individual clients, and this became evident in asking questions,

and defining and clarifying the relationship between the couples.

With regard to the way of working with couples the psychoanalytic

orientation emphasizes the importance of listening non-directively, of a

simultaneous awareness of both partners’ transference toward the other and of the mutually transferential projective system within the marriage, encouraging couples

to communicate and listen, show empathy and reflect back. The couple therapists

in the integrative orientation widely used a variety of ways to work with couples;

they focused on encouraging couples to communicate. The couple therapists in the

person-centred orientation work with couples by facilitating collaborative

conversation for each of the partners by speculating aloud about what each may be

thinking and feeling. The couple therapists in the behavioural orientation work by

defining and clarifying the relationship between the couples. Thus the

psychoanalytic orientation, integrative orientation, person-centred orientation and

behavioural orientation each have special and particular ways to work with couples.

The survey suggests that the couple therapists felt the main elements of

successful couple therapy to be the therapeutic alliance with couples and a trusting

couple therapy. The couple therapists surveyed here highlight the value of specific

ways of working, such as developing empathy, communication, problem-solving,

and changing the repetitive cycles of interaction between the partners.The survey

suggests that these phenomena may have been related to how couple therapists

worked with couples so that what couple therapists do in therapy influences the

elements of successful couple therapy and the couples’ particular moments of change. The fact that couple therapy indicates some movement towards integrative

practice demonstrates that the potential for incorporating Focusing or sensitive

listening from and for the felt sense which forms part of Focusing-Oriented