Invasió de la intimitat

Act XVIII: Afternoon, 1974

"Extra guests are not allowed, this is a family meeting, you see," Cheng purred between his lips as two of his largest henchmen held Leeteuk down in the most unkind of ways. He was clean cut and shaven in his suit, but he wasn't very handsome. There was a tattoo of a tip of a dragon's head just peeking through the suffocating collar around his neck. I wish I was that collar. I wished for a lot of things. I would have none of them.

Here was the man who controlled about every aspect of my life, here was the man who ruined it with a single flick of the finger, here was the man getting married to the love of my life simply because he is the man.

I sort of hated him.

"Let him go, he did not do anything," I spoke between gritted teeth, I couldn't lose the cool I didn't have in the first place, he didn't have to show up in my life

physically until now, and yet he could still overpowered me. As much as I didn't want to feel, I couldn't help but fear what he could do right in front of me.

Tiffany could only look away, I could see darker spots staining her dress, a sign of tears. What does she have to cry about? Who is she crying for? The stained glass window of Virgin Mary frowned upon her. Maybe, I thought almost mockingly, maybe she forgot to pray before she fucked him.

I sort of hated her too.

I came here because of love. But now that I'm here, it's a different story already.

Maybe I just came here for answers. And Leeteuk's existence just made it even more complex. He insisted on coming, insisted on protecting me, even though I attempted to convince him that a gun was all that I needed. A gun was better than a human, because you can control, you can always count on it not to throw you under the bus. Unless if it doesn't trigger.

And when he brought a pistol of his own, I was powerless.

"You see, the child is always going to be in the shadow of the parent. Sure,

apprentices learn from their Masters, but even Masters are afraid. They are afraid of their students overpowering them, knowing more than them, so there's always a move that isn't taught, something you could use for the grand finale or some shit like that. You know, Taeyeon, I was always afraid of you."

His gun swung my face, and I didn't flinch.

"Look at you, just look at yourself. You're beautiful and disgusting all at once to me. You look like your Mother. But your eyes look like mine. Why is that Taeyeon? How could two people that are so different could be so much alike? I wanted to erase you from this Earth, but I didn't want to do it myself. But of course, we all like to play with you food, I wanted you to suffer first, then now,

now...everything, everything was set up for your demise. But you just had to be like me, that tough son of a bitch that wouldn't say no to anything. No even...not even love."

He inhaled.

"Your...guardian, Mr. Kim, he raised you like his own, didn't he? You didn't know all that time, he was paying me. All his money is my money. And all I wanted to do was to get my money back. But the building, that building was yours, White men aren't worth associating with. You trust the dominant culture one time, you serve them like a God and in return, they'll screw you over. Terry Wong, Terry was a good man, you see. He had this large guilt about lying to a comrade, but money got through to him. We breathe it, you know? Sparrow, my retarded son, he just listens to what his Mother's words, her words is just a puppets to the money signs."

He exhaled.

"And Leeteuk, good old Leeteuk. How did he feel under you fingertips? Rendering your strength helpless? Pretty, isn't he? I wonder why he would get so close, like your Father, your companion, your..."

"He was my best friend."

"Was, I see. Leeteuk knew."

He inhaled.

"And Tiffany, the love of your fucking life. You see, I really didn't want to drag her in here, but her cute face was just hard to resist. And her largest weakness wasn't money, it was you. You, you, you. You better feel special."

"You promised that you would let her go," Tiffany spoke between sobs. She was just so useless.

"Ah, yes, yes, I did promise, I will let her go. After this. Since Tiffany is in such a rush for the ceremony, choose."

"What?"

"Taeyeon, you're smart aren't you? I told you to choose. Raise your gun. No funny business now."

He stepped a good distance away and dropped his gun to the ground after unloading its cartridge.

"Two people. Me and Tiffany, or me and Leeteuk."

"How do you know that I'll follow your rules?"

He smiled, "Because you are my child."

I closed my eyes and put my hands on the trigger, this felt like ripping a bandage off of my wounds. My mental debt will just add, add until I don't know what to do anymore.

Fuck this.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

"You happy?"

"Yes, I am pretty fucking happy."

"Why...why is that...your Father is dying...your lover is dying in your arms..."

"A Father is a lot more than you. I know where the bullet hit Tiffany. I know where the bullet hit Leeteuk. That is all I need to know."

He used the last of his strength, to pull himself a little closer and to tilted his neck to look directly at me.

"You killed him."

He then inspected Tiffany.

"Frontal lobe for that girl, she may never remember you anymore."

"I will find a way, she will remember me."

"She - "

"I said, SHE WILL REMEMBER ME."

"If you live, my child, remember, don't lie. It's bad for you."

I smiled as my Father died.

Bullshit.

Tiffany was motionless in my arms, but still breathing, I loaded her into the back of a hot-wired car and my eyes met the front door of the church. Only God's eyes will see what has happened there. Promise me God, to not tell anyone no matter

how hard they fucking pray. Because it was only fair when you didn't tell me a thing.

The long, flowing red velvet dress touched the ground when I situated myself in the front driver's seat. I concluded that it would get in the way, I didn't want to get into a car accident or something due to a piece of fabric.

So, I ripped it.

All are punished.

Act XIX: Morning, 1977

Act XIX: Morning, 1977

"That will be..."

Tiffany peered down on the label, her eyes couldn't help but trail elsewhere.

"Oh! That will be eighty four cents, yep, that's right..."

"Your attention span has been longer than usual, that is good."

I reached up to ruffle her hair, she used to hate it, but now it seemed to be the only thing that could comfort her. Just has Cheng had said, Tiffany couldn't remember much. She was truly alone, and with those eyes that she used on me the first time I saw her on that hospital bed, who was I to let her go? We weren't questioned much, even with our given conditions by the nurses or other hospital administrators,

because hurt was a common thing. It still is. But I think hate crimes reigned during those times again any person of race that wasn't White here.

The only evidence left of what happened at the church was whatever lied behind Tiffany's headband.

I didn't dare to take it away or look. It was for the owner's eyes to see only.

Was I guilty? Surprisingly, no. Because it was all set up for me, all I had to do was pull the trigger. Like a movie, there were gang members to clean up the mess that would trail to them, they never touched me, Tiffany, our store, or the apartment again. The only good thing about a gang was the fact that there was great loyalty, if their leader fell, they wouldn't operate until there was another leader installed. And thankfully, he enjoyed doing petty crimes than going after two defenseless women trying to put their lives back together.

Leeteuk, much to his Mother's sorrow, was missing to the world's eye. Even

though he may have been a traitor and a hero all in one, the world didn't care about him. Time didn't stop for him. His body was dragged away by the members, I'm sure, because there was no funeral. His Mother purchases a cemetery ground that would never be used, because even three years later, the body didn't show up.

There were loose ends that would never be tied, but I guess that's how the

American Dream goes. You leave a bunch of shit for the next generation to deal with. No wonder each generation is more fucked up than the last. We hand some screwed over kids with our problems, and we don't teach them how to learn over what to learn before we kick the bucket on them.

Hey, Tiffany, when I die, you be good, alright?

Tiffany couldn't read my thoughts, she just tilted into my touch as I couldn't keep my hands off her hair. In return of me being angry, selfish, vengeful, I think I have repaid my debts.Because every time I look at her, ignoring her bullet wound, it hurts. There's writing all over her arms, there are dates, and holidays, and stock prices to names and addressees, all over her arm in pen, marker, whatever.

Tiffany took my hand.

"I wonder why you ripped that red dress, I really liked the way it fit on you."

"Tiffany, I love you."

"I love you too. Cheng."

For some reason, not hearing my name come from her lips makes saying the truth easier.

See, I told you that I owned a gun for a reason, Father.

Good morning.