LA ENSEÑANZA DE LA TRADUCCIÓN
Capítulo 1. La competencia traductora
1.3. LA ADQUISICIÓN DE LA COMPETENCIA TRADUCTORA
C
ongratulations on arriving at Level II! What a bad-ass you are! You've earned yourself another 5000 points--bringing your running total to a sexy 7000 points.Look, I realize that I've been throwing an awful lot at you. If you've come this far and your head hasn't exploded, give yourself a hearty pat on the back.
You deserve it.
And if your head has exploded...then grab some damn tissues, clean up the mess and let's get back to business!
Meanwhile, many lesser men (and all the women, duh!) have long since stopped reading. Because they know better. They're way smarter than that. They're smarter than me and they're smarter than you. They know this Inner RPG theory of mind—seriously, we're organized like a fucking role-playing game?!--cannot possibly be true since it's never been measured by any of the great measuring devices or studied in any of the great studies undertaken by the Keepers of the Standard Dogma who are duly charged with measuring and studying exactly these kinds of things and then letting us know what they find out.
And since nobody ever let us know about it, then the Inner RPG model cannot possibly be true.
Quod erat demonstrandum!
(That's Latin for, “In yo face, bitch!”, in case you wondered.)
Of course, they have a great point. It's entirely possible that not one concept, one secret or one distinction that I've shared with you so far--or that I'm gonna share with you if you continue this adventure--is True.
Well, you know what I say? I say...
Fuck the Truth!
(Although it's gonna have to get in line behind gravity and “dem bitches” for its scheduled fucking!)
What matters far more than if something (a theory of mind, the existence of God, the “spooky” theory of Quantum Entanglement) is True or not is...if it's Useful.
And it turns out that my Inner RPG model is exceedingly Useful—but only if you want to do things like turn on more women than ever before and fuck them in the way they so deeply desire and deserve.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand we just lost every academic in the world with that last pronouncement!
But fuck academics!
(We might even move them to the very front of the line!)
Here's the only question you need to ask yourself as we go forward...
Do you wanna get laid like a pirate...or like an academic?
Then choose accordingly.
Now that you've leveled up and are possessed of a hard-won understanding of how all humans operate on the inside, we're going to spend time focusing our energies on one specific iteration of homo sapiens:
You.
To that end, we're first going to get all N=1 on your ass, building your “stats” to improve your ability to attract higher caliber women through helping you get a handle on your beautiful body and present yourself with greater style.
After all, you wouldn't go up against a Boss Monster in an online RPG without having sufficient strength, weapons and battle points to make it likely you'd prevail, would you?!
In exactly the same way, this whole section of THE SEDUCTION BIBLE is designed to level you up to the point where you're prepared to hunt even the hottest of the hotties out in the Real-World Gaming Environment.
Additionally, we're gonna gamify you in earnest as we delve into the Game Reality within you to discover how improving the quality of play of a few key members of your crew can make you that much more shag-alicious.
And, finally, we’re gonna keep moving you in the direction of our ultimate goal.
You DO remember our ultimate goal together, right?! (And your answer better not be: “Get more pussy”!)
Our ultimate goal is for you to fully and completely step into your greatness.
Steve Jobs often noted that rival hardware and software companies shipped so much “shit work”
because they failed to understand “how much craftsmanship goes into turning a great idea into a great product.”
Anybody can have a great idea.
Very few of those great ideas ever become great products.
That's why Sturgeon's Law postulates that “90% of everything is crap”.
Craftsmanship was behind everything great that Steve Jobs accomplished at Apple.
Here’s a burning secret to keep you warm during the long Winter of Discontent we each must endure...
Craftsmanship is the secret sauce of greatness.
You, sir, are a great idea. But we need to apply some craftsmanship to transform you from that great idea into the “insanely great” man you've always been destined to become.
So that's what we're doing here. You know, in case you wondered.
This is fun, right?! Seriously, are you having a good time? 'Cause I'm having a fucking blast!
I thoroughly enjoy your willingness to keep playing this crazy game with me. I hope we get a chance to meet one day so I can hear wild, sordid tales of your success with women and with life—and maybe we'll even have a chance to go out and create some new, naughty adventures together.
Maybe we'll meet twins.
Conjoined twins.
Would that be sick or what?!