As you gain more experience, gain better control over your physiology and gain a better understanding of your sexuality, you will also gain an ability to decide on how you want your orgasms to be. You might even be able to reach a level where you are in pretty much a constant orgasm for several minutes – you hold off ejaculation and drop arousal just a little bit and then orgasm again. The many orgasms pretty much get blended into one big long orgasm such that they become nearly indistinguishable from one another. It will require a lot of practice and a very strong PC muscle to get to this level, but hopefully the possibility of having a five minute long orgasm will provide some motivation for you.
Exercise 4: Ascending and Descending
Now we come to the next crucial exercise. This is not a PC muscle strength or endurance exercise anymore. Instead, it allows you to develop a better awareness of your excitement levels and to start using your PC muscle in order to regulate them. You won’t be having full-blown non-ejaculatory orgasms yet, but you are getting close.
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There are two important points to be made about this exercise.
Firstly, this exercise can be done in parallel with the PC muscle strength exercises (1,2 and 3). You don’t have to wait until you are done with the full course of PC muscle training which, as you know, should last at least three weeks. I suggest you exercise your PC muscle for at least a little while, say a week, before you start doing this exercise. Remember to stick to your training schedule with the first three exercises, even if you start doing this exercise. A strong PC muscle is still crucial to developing into a multiorgasmic man.
Secondly, this exercise can be done both on your own or with your partner. How you choose to go about it, is up to you. I will describe both methods so that you can choose which is more appropriate for you. Perhaps you will decide to try the exercise on your own the first few times and then involve your partner.
The idea of this exercise is to gradually let your arousal rise to a very high level, then slightly engage your PC muscle to prevent the arousal from rising further and then let it come down before repeating the procedure.
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What should be said about the PC muscle at this point, is that it is not only capable of holding off your ejaculation. Tensing your PC muscle also tends to lower your arousal slightly or at least hinders it from rising further. Even if you don’t stop the physical stimulation, you’ll notice that if you squeeze your PC muscle, your arousal won’t rise as fast as it would if the muscle was relaxed. This is the property of the PC muscle that we will be using for this exercise.
You will be increasing your arousal by means of physical stimulation. Since you can do this exercise both with or without a partner, there are two ways you can stimulate yourself.
If you are doing the exercise alone, you will essentially be masturbating in order to increase your arousal. You can do this in either an “almost lying down” position – you can for example lie on a sofa or on the bed an put a few pilliows below your back – or you can do the exercise standing. The choice is up to you. For most men, the lying position makes the arousal rise slower, so it gives you better control over your excitement levels. The standing up position, however, might make you feel more “alert” which may also be beneficial. If you are not sure which position to
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For this exercise, I suggest you use an artificial lubricant. This makes your arousal progress in a smoother manner and the sensations are closer to real sex than with ordinary “dry” masturbation. You can probably find lubricant in any sex shop or drugstore. If you really don’t feel like buying lubricant, you can use baby oil – it’s almost just as good. In the extreme case where you are absolutely itching to do the exercise but don’t have any lube or baby oil at hand, you can even use oil from the kitchen – olive oil, for instance. Just note that in this case it will probably get very messy, so make sure you protect your bed/sofa/floor and have plenty of handtowels nearby. My point is that you really should use some sort of lubrication for this exercise.
When doing this exercise alone, you will want to apply plenty of lubricant to your hand or your penis and start masturbating in a very slow gentle manner. And by slow and gentle I really mean it. The masturabting habits of most men are such that they use a very tight grip on their penis and move their hand back and forth fairly fast. If you think carefully and compare how you would normally masturbate to how you would normally have sex, you’ll probably notice that in the former case the motion is significantly faster than in the latter. For the purposes of this
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exercise, I suggest you use a motion as slow as if you were having slow sex. Imagine the motion of slow sex and use the same speed for this exercise. It may feel strange if you’re not used to such slow movements when you are “on your own”, but just stick with it and it will feel more comfortable after a while.
Now, if you are doing the exercise with your partner, you will basically be having normal sexual intercourse. You will need to choose a position in which you (the male partner) are in complete control of the motion. In fact, your woman should not be providing any stimulation for you with her own movements, because she will not know all the details of your arousal and that is what matters in this exercise. I would not recommend the missionary position, because, although you are in control of the motion, the fact that you are facing downward tends to increase your arousal much quicker than in other poses. On the other hand, in positions where the man is lying on his back, he doesn’t have much control over the motion.
I would suggest two positions that are suitable for this exercise. The first is often called the “butterfly” position. The woman is lying on her back and the man is
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she is on the edge, entering her from the front. It may make sense to put a pillow or two under the woman’s buttocks in order to raise her pelvis. This is because you want your motion to be as horizontal as possible and not downward oriented. The other suitable position is “doggy-style”, which probably does not need much explanation, but here it is anyway: the woman is supporting herself on “all fours” facing downward and the man enters her from behind by, again, either kneeling on the bed or standing on the floor if the woman is in the edge of the bed. If your woman is comfortable with this position, it may be a bit better option since the motion is naturally more horizontal than with the “butterfly” position.
If you are doing this exercise with your partner, I would still recommend using a lubricant, unless your woman naturally gets very wet. If you are using a condom, make sure the lubricant you get is condom-compatible, since an oil-based lubricant can potentially break a latex condom. The motion you will be using will still be a very slow and gentle motion, as with the solo approach. Also, remember that this is an exercise, this is not “normal” sex – you shouldn’t be trying to please your partner at this point. I suggest that you make sure that both you and your
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woman understand this. It’s important that you focus on your own bodily sensations.
When you start the exercise, whether alone or with your partner, take the time to really notice all the sensations in your body, especially in the genital region, to really feel your partner or your hand and to become really aware of your arousal level and how it grows as you keep moving. Don’t rush. At any point you notice yourself going a bit too fast for what you might call “slow sex”, slow down. Really pay attention to your motion and pace because you don’t want to have your arousal rise too fast.
Let us then start with the actual exercise. Apply the lubricant and either enter your partner or hold your penis with your hand and start the stimulation. Feel the arousal levels rise as you keep stimulating yourself. Remember – move slowly. Breathe calmly and deeply, feel the pleasure. Try to feel not only the arousal in your genitals, but the arousal of your whole body as your excitement level rises.
As you keep doing this, paying close attention to all your sensations, you should soon notice that your arousal is reaching a point where you know that you are
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soon going to ejaculate. Not immediately, but fairly soon. Don’t let this feeling slow you down or make you stop the stimulation just yet. You want to reach the point that we have called “a very high state of arousal” – around 90%. This is the point where you know that just one or two more strokes – and ejaculation will be inevitable, however you can still stop it now by stopping the stimulation. This is the point you want to reach, not earlier and not later. This point might not be very obvious and that’s why you have to pay really close attention to your sensations and proceed slowly.
Once you reach the 90% point, there are two things to do.
First, stop completely. Stop all stimulating motion and, if you are doing this with partner, make sure that she also stops any stimulation she might be giving you.
Second, engage your PC muscle. The same way you tensed the muscle during the first three exercises, tense it right now. You will feel your arousal quickly subside. It probably won’t drop massively, perhaps to 80% or 85%, but you should feel the difference. You should feel like you can do a few more strokes without ejaculating. However, don’t continue with the stimulation for now.
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You should squeeze the muscle just enough for the arousal level to drop to 80%- 85%. How long this takes will depend on your own physiology, but if you are not sure about your arousal level, tense the PC muscle for 5-10 seconds. Once you feel your arousal has dropped a bit, release the muscle and relax your body.
Now let your arousal gradually subside. Let it drop to about 50%-60%. Don’t do anything during this time – don’t stimulate your genitals in any way and don’t squeeze your PC muscle, just relax and breathe calmly. It’s okay if your erection weakens during this period. If you are using a condom and your erection weakens substantially, you might consider changing the condom before your resume.
So once you feel that your arousal has dropped to about 50%-60%, however you define that for yourself, simply repeat the process: stimulate your penis, reach a very high level of arousal, tense your PC muscle, let the arousal drop, release the muscle and let the arousal drop further.
You will probably notice that with every such cycle, your arousal will rise faster and faster during stimulation. It will also take longer and longer to have your excitement drop while you are not stimulating. (This is by way, one reason why I
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don’t really like the idea of expressing arousal as a number – it doesn’t take into account how fast your arousal rises or drops.) You don’t have to wait until your arousal drops all the way to 50%-60% on every cycle. You can “raise the plank” with every cycle if you feel like it.
How many such cycles you do, depends on your own preference. I would say, do at least 3 or 4. It is quite likely that at some point you will “miss” the 90% point, reach the point of no return and ejaculate. Don’t worry, that’s fine, you simply need to learn to listen to your body a bit more and that will come with practice and that’s what this exercise is for. Once you have done a sufficient number of cycles and you feel that they are getting too quick, i.e. your arousal rises fast and then doesn’t really drop, just let yourself ejaculate and finish the exercise.
Now, how often you do this exerise is entirely up to you. That will depend on your sexual habits, on the time it takes you to “recover”, on the amount of time you can dedicate to this exercise etc. I wouldn’t recommend doing the exercise more than 2 or 3 times a day, but also not less than once every 2 or 3 days. If you stick within these limits, your exercise regime is fine. Keep on repeating the exercise for at least until you are finished with exercises 1, 2, 3 and maybe for a week or
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