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Part II: “I Rock Me in My Arms, I Rock You in My Arms”

A Poem Celebrating African Fatherhood in America performed by Ibe Kaba

Scene Audio

Video

1 <<Music & SB from

videos>> <Open> We hear Somali music playing along with soundbites from the various series. It ends with the title of the program in both Somali and English on the screen 2 Zahra (visibly pregnant)

and sister-in law are in the kitchen talking we pick up their

conversation

<Zahra>

(reaching up to cupboard)

My stomach is big enough that it’s starting to get in the way!

3 Zahra and her sister-in- law are making tea in the kitchen.

<sister-in-law>

I remember those days. How have you been doing? <Zahra>

Pretty well, although my emotions are all over the place. Yesterday I was doing laundry and I couldn’t find a matching sock and I started to cry!

<sister-in-law>

(starts to laugh) Oh no! You were crying over a sock?

<Zahra>

Well, I guess it was more than that.

My thoughts are feelings are all over the place. And it’s more difficult not having more of our family here to help.

4 The two women pick up the tea and bring it into the living room where the husband and his brother are sitting. They drop off the tea and go back into the kitchen. We stay with the men and listen to their conversation.

<sister-in-law>

I know it can be tough, but we’re here for you. I know that pregnancy can be a lot of emotions- anger, sadness, happiness all in the same minute. But just remember it’s not just you. It’s very common. But if it gets really hard to keep up your normal activities, make sure to talk about it with your doctor.

<Zahra>

Here you go (sets down tea)

5 Women leave <Husband> Thank you.

6 Husband and brother take a drink of the coffee.

<Brother>

So, are you ready to become a father like the rest of us?

7 <Husband>

Yes, I’m excited, but a little nervous. Having Zahra pregnant has been different.

The other day she was happy and then started crying while folding clothes. It was very strange and not like her.

8 <Brother>

(Laughs) Yes, I remember that with my wife as well. Mood swings are very common.

But it’s not just the mother who experiences changes. The father goes through many things as well. There are many changes that happen in the household. Pregnancy can be a stressful time- especially with the first child. I found that helping around the house can even help- it relieves some of the stress.

<Husband>

I have been doing more little things around the house- like picking up dirty dishes or helping with other chores.

I’ve also been trying not to get mad at her mood swings.

<Brother> Good idea.

Sometimes it’s tough being a father. It seems different here in America. Fathers here are more involved and many of our family members are still back home. And, there are more options during the birth. For example, there are different pain

medications that can help Zahra during pregnancy. You’ll both need to talk about that to figure out what is right for her. Pain medication can help a lot. But if she decides not to use pain medications, there are other things the health care providers can have her do to help with the pain.

9 <Husband>

Zahra said her doctor mentioned I could be in the

birthing room. I thought that was strange. <Brother>

No, not at all. More Somali fathers are attending their children’s births. I did with our son. It was nice to be there for Asha and see the baby being born. It also gave us the chance to make sure Somali customs were carried out.

10 <Husband>

The traditions are important to us. Can we still whisper in the baby’s ear?

<Brother>

Oh yes. But, make sure Zahra speaks with her doctor beforehand about it. Is she going in for checkups already?

<Husband>

Yes. I think she has another checkup next week. <Brother>

Then, just have her talk to her doctor or midwife about it so you both know what to expect. Many Americans don’t know about our customs, but they are willing to learn- you just need to tell them and talk about options.

Zahra can talk to her doctor about all of her wishes. Here in America it seems the women have many more choices then back home. So make sure you both talk about how you want things done beforehand.

11 <Husband>

Yes, I don’t want an argument in the hospital during the birth. I think there will be enough stress already. 12 Pan from brothers to

another item in the room- possibly the tea cups.

(music starts to come in) <Brother>

You two will be fine and you’ll make great parents.. 13 Title of the program

appears over the last shot.

<Music full>

14 Ibe Kabal on Cam <<Ibe Kabal Poem>> 15 Dip to black

16 March of Dimes Logo & wording:

"Funded by a Community Grant from the March of Dimes."

"This material is for information purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. The opinions expressed in this material are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the March of Dimes."

17 Mayo Clinic copyright

APPENDIX F

SOMALI CARES PROGRAM FOR PREGNANCY ©Michelle Dynes, CNM, RN, MSN

Somali Culturally Program for Pregnancy