A man is not able to force himself to think different thoughts from those that he habitually thinks. He cannot exclude certain thoughts from his mind or force others to enter by an effort of will. Thought originates in the deeper recesses of his being, an area that largely is unavailable to-his conscious mind and one that for the most part simply will not respond to coercion. A psychological transforma-tion is not possible without a spiritual awakening, and before a man can change his kind and type of thinking, it first is necessary that he alter his conception of self. A little reflection on the ego re-veals what a delusional trap it is, for it is primarily a sense of sepa-rateness and it feeds upon a sense of comparison. It is pleased to be better than others, extremely sad to be worse, and it performs all
actions for selfish motives—avarice, applause, power. The greatest sickness in the world is to be satisfied in the ego, for then we are blinded to the real nature of life and our own potentiality. Only when we are dissatisfied in the ego through defeat or dis-illusionment are we close to the veil that separates us from our true selves. It is at this moment that we suddenly may see, that our eyes and souls may open and penetrate into the deeper and wider being that gives a universal quality to all people.
We immensely improve our ability to visualize when we rid our-selves of the mental blocks and prompters that are stored in our subconscious. These we are able to clear away through a proper psychic balance between the ego and the Secret Self, and we achieve this balance by surrendering ego and turning our lives over to the Divine. This is not nearly so difficult as it sounds. We are not responsible for our existence in the first place. We didn’t choose the bodies we inhabit or the life into which we were born, our language, customs, education, even the people we know have been chosen for us by a greater power. When we learn to trust this power completely, to turn over to it our sense of self, our actions, our mind, our ability, our talent, we are enlarged by it because of that very act. It uses us for its purpose and many times more effec-tively than we could ever use ourselves. There is tremendous ener-gy to be gained by surrender of the ego to the Secret Self. A man becomes a power doubled. He suddenly seems free of restriction, cleared of restraint; his health, energy, and resources know no lim-it.
LETTING GO
Terry was a brilliant youngster. He had a straight A average in high school and was awarded a scholarship at a leading western university. But he was an intensely nervous and high strung young man, seemed constantly fearful and apprehensive. He would jump at the slightest noise, was shy and awkward in the presence of
strangers, became tongue-tied when given an opportunity to speak, was afraid of heights, was afraid of closed places, was sick a good deal of the time. Even though he was graduated from college with honors, he nevertheless had great difficulty in finding a job, so un-favorable was the impression that he made upon prospective em-ployers. His record prevailed, however, and he eventually found employment in the laboratory of a large industrial firm, where he helped in the research department. Then for no apparent reason he suffered a nervous breakdown and was confined to a sanatorium.
Some months later he left the sanatorium, but he was too distracted to readjust to life, and he was directed by a friend to a religious re-treat.
The retreat house stood on the bluffs overlooking the Pacific Ocean, and on a clear day a hundred miles of the California coast-line could be seen. The brown hump of Santa Catalina Island stood off shore like a camel rising from the sea, and a light breeze gener-ally blew off the ocean, carrying with it the salty tang of seaweed and kelp. Terry sat for hours on a stone bench, gazing out over this panorama. The magnificence of nature dwarfed him, and he could feel his ego subside. During such a mood, his advisor came to him, and they sat on the stone bench and talked.
“I see you are better now,” the advisor said. “It stands in your eyes.
You are not so concerned with yourself.”
“That’s true,” answered Terry. “It’s because it’s so peaceful here.”
“It is peaceful anywhere, my son, if your soul is properly cen-tered.”
“How does one properly center his soul?”
“By getting rid of self-consciousness.”
“That’s very difficult to do when one has an inferiority complex.”
“An inferiority complex is a delusion.”
“It may seem a delusion to you,” answered Terry, “but it is not a delusion to me. I am fearful and apprehensive in all I do because I feel inferior, because I am afraid I will not do well.”
“Then get rid of the sense of yourself as doer. Accept yourself only as instrument. Make up your mind that a power greater than you are is working through you to accomplish its ends. It is not embar-rassed or fearful or apprehensive. It is dynamic, irresistible, and eternal. If you can manage to put yourself in its hands completely, you never will be embarrassed or fearful again, and you will ac-complish such things as you never thought possible.”
Terry listened to his advisor well. In the days that followed, he gazed out upon the sea and sky, and the truth came to him. When he left the retreat and returned to his home, his illness was gone, and he experienced a vigor in mind and body that he had never known. He undertook his work with serenity, became able to talk freely in front of people, mixed with them gladly, eventually came to lead them. Today he heads his own research company. He is well-to-do and respected, has not had a sick day in years. He cre-dits everything to his religious awakening.
“I always thought that I was the one who was carrying the ball,” he says, “and the responsibility frightened me. Once I learned that the world and its events and my life were in safer hands than mine, I was able to get myself out of the way and see the working of a master intelligence everywhere. The things I seem to have accom-plished have been accomaccom-plished by something outside me. It works through me just as it will work through you. All I do is let it.”