OBLIGACIONES DE LAS PARTES IMPLICADAS

The majority of our physical boo-boos, scratches, pains, diseases, grazes, injuries and hurts are often linked with suppressing one of our negative emotions. All chronic physical problems have systemic, internal roots. Our role: uproot them!

Are we angry? Sad? Depressed? Disappointed? If so, we could go beyond our present circumstances to consider what happened in the past and ask ourselves: “Why is my inner child X (write your emotion – angry / sad / hurt / jealous)?” The root of this feeling can be blocked in our inner child and our body is physically manifesting it and trying to get rid of it. This could just be the flu, an ache or even more serious illnesses.

For example, Hellinger discovered in Family Constellations that sometimes breast cancer is an atonement for the injustice done to a man. Food addictions (binge eating, anorexia, and bulimia) are often related with abuse and sexual harassment. Degenerative diseases (Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, dementia) are connected to the desire to go back into childhood to escape the difficulties of present daily life. In removing themselves from the present, people with these conditions can be seen to heal their past and therefore their inner child in a way, who was traumatized by a profound event, such as war, abuse, or suicide affecting either themselves or their family system.

Headaches are usually caused by love that is unable to flow. Perhaps as a child, our access or movement towards the mother was missing or perceived to be before we reached our goals or had our needs met. Described in an

earlier chapter as 'The Interrupted Movement', this process refers to separation from our mother or father in our early development phase (0 to 6 years old), as a result of abandonment, hospitalization, divorce, death or some other kind of absent behavior (withdrawal or insufficient attention due to another distraction). This is one possible cause of our headaches linked to underlying anger or aggressiveness towards the mother.

Shoulders can hold feelings of anger and conflict with others in the body. If we are experiencing pain in our shoulders, let’s ask ourselves, “Who do I want to slap?” Generally, if the suffering is located in our right side, the anger or conflict in the shoulder is against a man; on the left side, the anger is against a woman.

If we ever think about committing suicide, we can ask: “Who do I want to save?” We are probably entangled with someone who passed away before our birth and in loyalty to our family system; we want to follow that person.

Backaches tend to represent the pain of not feeling supported by our family. “Who do I have to bow to?” This is an important consideration, even though we think this person might not deserve bowing to. Scoliosis is often caused by a divorce or by being raised by parents from different cultures and because we can’t make a choice. Our spine tries to adjust itself between two different cultures or people. Rather than integrate, we try to balance separate entities.

Our eyes hold the soul of our parents. The left eye is our mother’s soul and the right eye is our father’s soul. When we have difficulty seeing, let’s ask ourselves, “What is it in my mother or father that I don’t want to face?”

If we make a fist with our hands, this generally means we are repressing anger. Let’s ask ourselves, “Why am I feeling angry while I am talking with him/her?”

When our body shivers and we are not freezing temperature wise, this means our body is expelling fears. The shaking releases repressed fears.

A heavy calf can describe an unspoken sadness.

Being anxious is the same feeling as being excited -- with a dash of fear -- “What am I afraid of?”

When we get sick, this is often because we aren’t feeling confident enough about a meeting, a person or a situation and so to avoid it, we get sick!

To summarize, let’s ask ourselves, “Where do I feel pain?”

Let’s focus our mind on this pain and inhale and exhale very deeply until we feel it easing off. If not, I recommend buying Louise Hay’s book, You Can Heal Your Life. This book provides great insight into our body and our different pains.

Our body is our best doctor. Pay attention to its signs. By becoming our body’s friend, we will avoid a lot of undesirable, useless suffering.

Affirmations

I love all my emotions. They all have a purpose. I listen to my body.

I am worthy of experiencing my feelings. Scan Your Body

It’s time to listen to your body. Scan your body from head to toe. Where do you feel tension? Describe the feeling linked to this tension. Give the feeling a color or a texture. Be as descriptive as possible. The feeling you’re describing is the old insecurity and fear that lives underneath your need to control. That feeling was never healed so you think you need to control it. Take 60 seconds to just breathe into the feeling wherever it lives in your body, then let it go.

You can even silently talk to your body using these phrases: “I calm my body”, “I liberate my body”, “I am free from anger, fear and anxiety”, “I am aware of my whole body”.