Pruebas diagnósticas de precisión cuantitativa

When you go through a breakup, it’s natural to lose a sense of purpose.

You start to let things slide and nothing seems to be worthwhile.

That’s ok for a short period, but one thing you must do during this time is take on small responsibilities.

Why?

There are a few reasons:

1. It gives you a sense of order and routine.

2. It keeps you “in the game” so that everything in your life doesn’t fall apart.

3. It gives you an internal feeling that there are important things in life other than your relationship.

It is often said that the happiest people in life are those who focus on a purpose bigger than themselves.

This doesn’t require you to join a cause or go on a moral crusade, but it’s important that your brain has daily reminders that there are responsibilities in life completely unrelated to love, relationships,

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and matters of the heart, and that you can derive emotional and spiritual satisfaction from all these different areas.

One thing I don’t recommend here is burying yourself in work and overloading yourself for no real end. This can have a counterproductive effect of making you feel over-anxious and in need of a “relationship fix” to cure your problems at work, which can in turn leading to you doing something dumb like texting your ex to tell them how lonely or difficult things are right now.

To keep the balance, just take on some responsibilities. Maybe it’s one big work project that you can busy yourself with, chipping away at for a few hours a day. Maybe it’s a weekly goal that people rely on you to achieve and which will give you some focus while you work towards it.

You need at least 3-4 hours of your day that is occupied with productive or creative work, something other than “getting over your ex” or “thinking about your ex” activities.

I’ve seen many people foolishly stop taking on work after a breakup, choosing to isolate themselves from all responsibility in an effort to

“get their shit together” again before they move forward in their lives.

They act like a tortoise withdrawing into their shell who decided they will only poke their head out when they feel 100% better again.

This can take a long time, and it’s much more effective to take on responsibility in small doses, even if you don’t feel anywhere near your best self right now.

Always be patient. Your old self will return eventually, but you can’t put your life on hold until that happens. Otherwise, you could be on a long downward spiral as you wait endlessly for all the bad hangover feelings of your relationship to go away. Remember, this

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is not like a hangover. A day, or a week, of lying in bed, watching movies and eating pizza isn’t going to suddenly sober you up and make you ready to take on the world again.

Recovering from a breakup is much more like an athlete recovering gradually from an injury. In the Athlete Recovery Model, when you sustain an injury, it’s important to get back to light training as soon as possible. An athlete begins physical therapy very soon after being injured. She might have a day or two of lying in bed feeling sorry for herself, but after that it’s straight into recovery. Even if it’s the lightest exercise possible, professional physiotherapists realize that to return to full fitness, it’s necessary to put a little strain on the body and keep exercising it, gradually building the muscles up again so that they don’t go slack and get progressively weaker. So some strain (not excessive amounts) actually helps you build back up again.

For quick reference, just remember: You are adopting the Athlete Recovery Model, not the Hangover Recovery Model (These two models are mentioned in Step 2 of the main program).

To take this on right now, I want you think of three negative modes of recovery you’re currently adopting and turn them into three positive forms of recovery (embodied by the Athlete Model). For example, you could write down the following as positive actions you can take today:

1. Choose a friend you could call up right now to arrange a coffee and a catch-up or a night out. If possible, also find a friend with whom you can go to something completely new: a concert, a new cocktail bar, or a fun event like a boxing class or group activity that will involve meeting other people.

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2. One positive exercise you could do to feel more confident in your appearance (e.g. signing up for 45 minutes of circuit training in a group class at the gym, buying a new outfit, getting a facial to take care of your skin, or even taking care of your teeth by booking a dentist appointment). Remember:

These aren’t changes to make you good enough for your ex, these are changes to make you feel good about yourself.

They are to prove to you how happy and fulfilled you can be with or without him.

3. Write down 5 things you are grateful for in your life each day. Many sources, from Buddha to the most cutting-edge, modern neuroscience, have shown the benefits of gratitude and taking the time to make a practice of acknowledging all the good in our lives on a daily basis. Even if you were proud just to have sent an email you really needed to send today, or you were happy that the sun was shining and that you were able to get a good hour of creative work done, or you were pleased to connect with a loved one, or you’re just grateful to be alive and healthy, write it down and you’ll start to see areas everywhere to be grateful. Even be grateful for the pain you’re feeling right now; it means that someone mattered to you and that you experienced a unique and intimate connection with another human being on this earth.

You are now well and truly in recovery mode and it’s only a matter of time until you feel confident and capable of deriving fulfillment from many areas of your life other than just your relationship.

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Strategy 6