Chinese culture is very different from that of Western countries. It has its own cultural norms and values (Buttery & Leung, 1998). The way people talk to each other and resolve issues is different from that in foreign countries, especially in terms of people facing management staff, who are seen as having more privileges than “common people” (Buttery & Leung, 1998) and people value “We” respect ( collectivism) instead of “I” respect (individualism) (G. H. Hofstede et al., 2010). When they talk to others, Chinese people are not as direct as people who are from other countries. Thus, returnees who had accepted Western values and norms no longer were sure what they should or should not say. R7, who had stayed in the US for seven years, said it had become natural for her to say her thoughts directly and she did not know how to say good words to others, which she felt made her unpopular. In China, to be indirect or to say nice words to others is regarded as respecting others, even if what you say is not the truth. This was one of the most difficult and challenging readjustment problems in her returning experiences. Consequently, she sometimes had to lie or be very cautious if she wanted to say something and she found it difficult to keep a balance between these two norms. R4, who went to the US as a teenager and stayed there for nine years, had a similar view:
After I came back, I found that my thinking was different from others. I am very direct. I directly say what I want to say, which makes some Chinese people feel uncomfortable. You know Chinese people are very indirect. Many teachers [her colleagues] say that I am 80% more like an American.
This description gives an insight into some of the cultural differences that returnees such as R4 and R7 had to face when they returned to their home culture. Because they had been immersed in different cultures for many years, they had accepted the cultural mores of the host culture. When they came back to China, they had to re-adapt to the Chinese culture. R11 had a similar view. She had stayed in Australia for five years and then returned to the university in which she had worked before she went overseas to study her PhD. She acknowledged that because she had stayed in Australia for several years, her thinking and views had changed, which sometimes made her feel uncomfortable after coming back. She said:
In terms of the re-adaptation after coming from the foreign country, I think much of it is about the re-adaptation to the life and interpersonal relationships here. The interpersonal relationship is very complicated here. I feel I am like an idiot after coming back. I feel I am like a person coming from [the] countryside. My thinking is simple. My way of talking is direct. My thinking is direct. Then I encountered some unexpected frustrations.
The way people deal with interpersonal relationships indicates a country’s cultural norm.
Chinese cultural norms were derived from the Confucian philosophy, which says people should be moderate and not go to extremes (Buttery & Leung, 1998; Sussman, 2011). Thus, Chinese people are reserved and indirect in dealing with others. In contrast, people in Western countries are more direct in their communications, so when returnees come back to the indirect culture, they can feel lost and confused. R11 said:
Anyway, when I first came back, I couldn’t adapt to the traffic, the complicated
interpersonal relationship between people. Even now, I still cannot adapt to many things here. However, I force myself to adapt. I force myself not to think about those things [lives overseas] on purpose, not to think about Australia, not to think about those simple lives. You have come back. You need to settle down, and then
you need to accept it. You have to go with … the flow. … However … I feel exhausted and messed up, so I still don’t feel good.
For R11, forcing herself to adapt to the life back at home was the only choice for her, but the cultural differences between China and Australia made this re-adaptation difficult. To R11, interpersonal relationships in Australia were simpler than that in China and
people dealt with others in a simple way. The rituals people dealt with interpersonal relationship and practices of Australian life had become her personal values and everyday practices. For her, discarding her newly acquired cultural habits from her host country and trying to re-adapt to the culture in China were full of challenges.
R12 had a similar experience. She studied in Thailand (MBA) and France (Masters in International Finance) before she returned to work at the banking industry and international companies. Having difficulty adapting to the life back in China, she then went to study for a PhD in higher education in the US. At the time of this research, she had been working at a Chinese university for three and a half years. Her experience of working at this university helped her understand the Chinese culture fully and realise how different this culture was from those in other countries. She reported:
I think if I had not come to work at this university, I would have never known how the Chinese social system was running. It was like a reflection of the society. From this miniature of the society, I learned more about China from this small university
work environment. … After I came back, it is working at this university that made me understand the way Chinese people work and the way they live.
I had difficulties in adapting to all kinds of things. The society makes it difficult for me to adapt. I think that in Thailand, the relationship between people and their attitudes towards doing things between them are very simple and convenient. People are respected. Then it is the same in European countries.
To R12, the rules, norms and the hierarchical structure at the university made her realise that Chinese people were deeply influenced by the culture and nothing could change it. She believed that respect for others was also a Western and Thai cultural value and implied that the relationship between people in those countries was more equal than in China. Like R11, when she compared Chinese cultural values with those in the countries in which she had stayed, she preferred the relationship between people in Thailand and the Western countries. She carried with her the cultures of those countries, which made it hard for her to accept some aspects of the Chinese culture when she returned.