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Identity and traditions were both linked to domestic tourism behaviour and social connectedness. The first was about a national identity and the latter was about a family identity, while together they were about social identities and perpetuating family rituals in the form of a holiday tradition. Family holidays signified a continuation of a tradition passed down from generation to generation as exemplified in these responses:

“I like the idea of having a family holiday every year. That seems to be a good Kiwi thing to do. I grew up with it so it is nice to pass that on to the kids.” (Kea mother, final individual interview)

“For me it is a continuation of letting the children enjoy a summer beach holiday which is something of a privilege I had a as a child.” (Kereru mother, final family interview)

Within the tradition of family holidays there were also distinct rituals, such as family song and a log book, which reinforced the symbolic nature of holidays:

“And get in the car and we have this family song that we normally sing. It is such an annoying song and we scream it out when we go in the car. You can ask <husband> to sing it, it is Afrikaans and we made it up ourselves before we had <daughter>. It is like, we are on holiday, we are on holiday, yip, yip, hooray!” (Goldfinch mother, pre-individual interview)

“<Wife> keeps a journal of the things that happened on the way and all the adventures and what time we were at such and such a place. Yes, we do have them going back to years and it is quite funny to take them all with you and read them on the way.” (Kereru father, pre-individual interview)

For the parents the symbolism of maintaining a family tradition was linked to creating positive memories, which was part of a concern for establishing and guiding the next generation or generativity (Erikson, 1950; Shaw et al., 2008).

The themes in this section were mainly probed in the final interview phase as identified by the GTM (Table 3.11).

5.5.1 CREATING MEMORIES

Parents used holidays as an opportunity to create memories which were part of generating a social identity in its family members. The memories centred on special moments that were considered different from everyday life (see section 5.3.1):

“And it is so special and it is memories that you will get that no one can take away from you. And it draws everyone in the family closer, those special moments that you share.” (Goldfinch mother, final individual interview)

Memory creation through family tales and lore were exemplified by an incident of dolphins that were mistaken as sharks from the final Kereru family interview:

Mother: “The dolphins.”

Father: “The non-sharks.”

Boy3, 10: “The ones you [family] thought were sharks.”

Mother: “A family legend.”

Holiday memories had an intangible character that could be easily forgotten:

“It is all enjoyable at the time but a lot of it is not tangible but obviously we still enjoy it. But everyone can forget quite easily.” (Kakariki father, final family interview)

A generation later and over time, holidays became a general enjoyable memory interspersed by highlights:

“If I look back to my childhood and all the years we went to our holiday place that was all a blur as well. It is just a general memory of a nice pleasant holiday. And I guess there are some things that stand out and actually they were all incidences.” (Fantail mother, final individual interview)

Photos in general helped in stimulating and creating the holiday memory. They became the tangible element of otherwise intangible and unreliable memories and, thus, perpetuated the tradition and symbolism of family holidays. For parents this was deliberate whereas for the children it was more incidental:

“And because the kids are young and we might forget we do take lots of photos as well to jolt the memory quickly.” (Kakariki father, final family interview)

“With things you don’t remember you can look at the photos.” (Weka girl1, 8, final family interview)

For children the memories were mainly about activities that were novel or unexpected (different from normal) or related to other people such as friends and relatives. Their memories generally faded over time and in the process became

more positive (see section 6.7.3). These were responses to the question of why and what they remembered:

“Because they [activities] were fun and I don’t get to do them much. So that was kind of a first opportunity thing.” (Kea girl1, 10, final individual interview)

“I think I will remember the show that we [cousins] performed in front of the adults and how we made it and collecting all the money of the adults.”

(Weka girl2, 7, final individual interview)

Holiday memories had perpetuity to them, possibly ranging several generations from parents’ childhood memories to children in the future passing on memories to their children. In this way parents seek to recreate their memories of childhood holidays experiences for their children (see Kyle & Chick, 2004; Small, 2008) and maintain a family tradition over time. The holiday memories got reconstructed through photos which constituted a more positive retelling and a (re)production of an idealised family time. For parents this production of memory stories was part of a deliberate desire to provide meaning, permanence, and social belonging that was captured by the family gaze (see Haldrup & Larsen, 2003). For children the memories centred on unusual experiences and social relations while their purposive meanings were not recognised at the time.

5.5.2 GENERATIVITY

For some parents holidays provided a conscious opportunity for guiding their children (or generativity) by instilling values, traditions, and skills, whereas for other parents it was a continuation of what they usually did:

“I don’t think holidays as any different from the general during the year when we try and instil values and skills and so on.” (Hoiho father, final individual interview)

“I think it [holiday] is a very important time to teach your children and that is something I remember from my childhood…We did those things and they were fun and maybe you hope that they are doing it for their children. There are lots of skills that I am hopefully passing on to the girls.” (Kea father, final individual interview)

Domestic holidays were also about fostering an appreciation of New Zealand or national identity in the children by showing them around the country:

“I guess almost the educational aspect of [holidays] as well. That is our opportunity to teach the kids holidays around New Zealand, to teach them about New Zealand and for us to learn as well.” (Kakariki mother, final individual interview)

“New Zealand is stunning and we need to expose our boys to a number of places in New Zealand so they have an appreciation of it…We want them to know and love home. We want them to have that and then go overseas but we want them to go overseas knowing that they have a beautiful place to come back to and to let other people know that it is great. We would actively encourage them to go overseas but they also need to know what New Zealand is first.” (Pukeko mother, post individual interview)

Holidays were also about teaching family-specific skills and encouraging personal interests that reflected gendered pastimes (see section 6.3.1) such as sailing, riding motorbikes, archery, and lighting fires outside the normal urban environment, as the Pukeko family at the pre-family interview demonstrated:

Mother: “We are all pyromaniacs, my dad is very happy that they all jointly build great bonfires, well supervised.”

Boy 1, 13: “It is a lot of fun.”

Father: “And it is not something you can do around here.”

Mother: “Not ever, but it is a really neat way to learn on how to do all of that what is sensible and what can be done and how to keep it under control. And they are lucky enough that they can ride motorbikes on the farm.”

Holidays also provided an opportunity for character development in the children by overcoming challenges and learning social and practical skills, which reflected the importance placed by the parents on acquiring general life skills:

“There are life skills everywhere, particularly on holiday because you are in a different environment and that is when their upbringing comes into play with the choices they can make.” (Pukeko father, final individual interview)

“It was good seeing the boys going into a new situation like doing the zorb, having to do it on their own and go off with strangers and a vague idea of what is going to happen.” (Kereru mother, final family interview)

“They [children] learn the value of looking after and empathy for each other and everyone has needs.” (Kakariki father, final individual interview)