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ome Bhikkhus go and sit in meditation practice on the edge of a deep chasm, which is enough to make them concerned in case they should fall. But these Bhikkhus are not afraid and have to do this as their method of training. If such a Bhikkhu should forget himself so that he loses mindfulness, he accepts the fact that he may fall into the gorge and die, but he does this because when he does his meditation practice in the normal way he cannot control his citta and make it remain still. It likes to become involved with things here and there and to be agitated by them, creating a lot of Dukkha for himself without letting up for a moment.

Both people and animals are afraid of death in the same way, so when they are put into a truly tight situation, such as going and sitting on the edge of a deep chasm, the citta has got to work and it does not need anything else to force it, for death is what the citta always instinctively fears most. At such a time, the citta fights against death with determination and it calls up mindfulness to be present the whole time, not allowing the citta to go elsewhere. He has mindfulness to help and support him at every moment and when the citta is well protected with mindfulness, it does not slip quietly away to other things which are appealing to the emotions and which have been its enemies in the past. Then before long the citta will be able to drop into concentration and calm. Those Bhikkhus who have used this method have attained results which are satisfying to the heart, in the same way as with those other methods.

Methods in which something is used as a goad, to arouse the fear of death, are very important and valuable. Therefore the work of looking after one’s life by having mindfulness present and aware of oneself, causes results in the direction of Dhamma to arise in one’s heart. In other words, one comes to

see clearly how the restless, boisterous citta calms down and tends toward

samādhi, and one does not have to wait a long time for this.

Some Bhikkhus go and sit and do their meditation practice in a cave. When they hear the roar of a tiger they notice that the citta does not feel in the least afraid, nor does it give way and go into samādhi as they want it to. Therefore they must look for a method of intimidating the citta, such as going out and sitting in front of the cave so that when the tiger comes there the citta will be afraid and quickly concentrate, calm down and look for a safe place free from fear where the tiger cannot touch it. So the citta then becomes calm and goes down into samādhi.

Generally speaking, those Kammaṭṭhāna Bhikkhus who have gained strength of heart at such a time as the citta is afraid and go on training themselves until the citta has dropped into a state of calm, feel quite sure that nothing that is dangerous can do them any harm at that time. But whatever the truth of this may be, they are not concerned, for they only think of it as being for the important task of gaining strength of heart then and in the future also. Even if they were to die at that time, they are ready to accept it and make the sacrifice, because their faith in Dhamma is greater than their fear of death.

This is why those who are truly intent on the essential meaning of Dhamma like to search for places and methods to train themselves in various ways with- out letting up. Because they have consistently seen results by direct experience from such places and methods. It is like making a small investment and getting a large profit from it which causes one much pleasure and should induce one to go on doing the same thing continually, without becoming either lazy or bored; as well as undercutting any uncertainty and doubt that may remain, about doing such things, as to whether they bring results or not. Because at every stage of the work, these practices give rise to the most obvious results which are self-evident.

One can sit in meditation practice in front of a cave, wander in the hills and sit in practice on rocky outcrops, wander in the manner of kammaṭṭhāna at night so as to meet a tiger, sit in practice in a place where tigers frequently pass by, or walk caṅkama and sit in practice competing with the roars of tigers round about, but all of these have just the purpose of helping the citta to con- centrate and go down into a state of calm much faster than it would normally do so. Or, to arouse wisdom in contemplation of the nature of wild animals as aspects of Dhamma, for the purpose of getting free from one’s “upādāna”

— attachment — to life and death and steadily getting rid of the longing — yearning for all sorts of things which are related to the citta. That’s the way! But not in any way for the destruction of oneself.

Those who aspire to get free from all aspects of dukkha based on birth and death, generally think and act in the above ways. Even the Lord Buddha, the foremost in the “Three Worlds” used the methods of abandoning his life by fasting, when he ate nothing for forty nine days, which is similar to the foregoing methods. For it is a method which needs strength and resolution in order to defeat the enemy within. But when the Lord saw that it was the wrong way he stopped. Then he turned and made an unshakeable resolve that he would sit and develop the ānāpānasati kammaṭṭhāna29 _{until he knew Dhamma}

(Enlightenment), which was his original purpose. He further resolved that if he did not come to know Dhamma in a way that would satisfy his purpose, then he would sacrifice his life in sitting and doing this meditation practice until he died, without moving from that place. This indicates that if he had not truly known Dhamma while sitting in that place developing ānāpānasati under the shade of the great Bodhi tree, it would have been the last move of the Lord’s life, for even while he was unsure of the way, there was no other way for him to go.

When one thinks about those who are the best and highest examples to the world whether it be the Lord Buddha and the Sāvakas through to the teachers

(Ācariyas) or those ordinary people everywhere who practise Dhamma, they

do things, whatever these things may be which are remarkable and which are very different from the usual ways of people, and they make an undying impression.

Thus, the Kammaṭṭhāna Bhikkhus work and strive and train themselves in various ways according to what suits each one’s nature and ability. They do not do it for excitement, nor for what is bordering on the conceit that they are more skilled, brave or able than their teacher — or anybody else. Because they have the pure intention of seeking the essential meaning and Dhamma to lead them on to freedom from dukkha by using these methods. This is how they work and struggle according to their strength and ability which is not even equal to the dust off the feet of the Lord Buddha when he concentrated his effort by his readiness to sacrifice his life. When it comes to this, how could they think that their efforts were superior to the teacher’s and how could they

29. Keeping one’s attention on the breath going in and out, as a suitable object to attach the mind to, so that it will calm down.

do the practice for the purpose of being able to show off to the world when their efforts are not worth the dust from the feet of the Lord Buddha?

If we think of the way of practice of the Lord Buddha and how he did things and compare it with ourselves who are always falling and failing and making only a little effort and afraid that we may go beyond the teacher — the Lord Buddha. This is shameful and the most disgraceful attitude.

I also am very clever at being afraid in this way, whereas in other ways which are bad I am not clever and not afraid. This is the way of ordinary peo- ple who go head first into those things which the wise warn us about, things which we should not want to go into. But those things which they advise us to do and to go into head first we avoid and are afraid of diving into. When I think about it I become angry with myself for being so clever at going in for the wrong things. The readers should not think that I am a good example or many of them may become people who go in for the wrong things also.

Those Dhutanga Bhikkhus who looked for various ways of training them- selves as already described, did these things from the beginning when they first received the teaching from Venerable Ajaan Mun when he was still young, and they continued to practise what he taught right up to the present. They did not slacken and give up for they saw it as an inheritance which he had bestowed on them with “mettā” and taught them in a heart felt way. So each of them tried to hold to the teaching with reverence and the faith that:

“This is the practice which he has done himself from which he has gained results that have become his heart’s refuge. This is also the best which he has selected from his own experience which was resolute, full of punch and vitality, which he has chosen to show for those who are resolute in Dhamma to take hold of as a method for continually teaching, training and disciplin- ing themselves in the future.”

veNeraBle ajaaN MuN’sDIscIplessaythatwheNhewasyOuNg he practised

with great determination and his teaching was very vigorous and full of punch, and he also had the faculty of knowing other people’s cittas (paracittavijjā). Even when he was almost seventy two years old, which was when I went to train under him, his teaching was still full of punch. In fact, when I first went to Venerable Ajaan and heard his teaching, I was almost unable to pay attention

because I was so afraid. But at the same time I had great reverence and faith in him and had to submit to the truths that he showed me in everything that he said, each time, for it was impossible to deny them. When Venerable Ajaan gave a Dhamma talk about the methods of using discipline to train the heart it was much more frightening, both in the sound of his voice which was loud and rhetoric, and also in the way in which he pointed with his finger while saying:

“Over there, are the forests! Over there, are the hills! They are the right places for a citta which writhes and turns about and is difficult to train. Don’t get involved in things, in friends or others in this monastery or elsewhere. One who practises the way must know his own character and he must know the way to train himself. If he does not know his own character, even if he went on working at his practice until he died he still would not get the results which he should. When his heart is obstinate he must be resolute in making effort and heavy handed with discipline. Whoever is afraid of tigers should go and stay in the forests and hills with them. Whoever is afraid of ghosts should go and stay in the cremation ground with various types of dead ghosts until the heart has become one with the ghosts! Then one will be able to say that the citta has submitted to the discipline.”

“If someone, who goes to stay in the forest is not yet unafraid in the face of the tigers, he must not give way and leave the forest; and if those who are afraid of ghosts have not lost their fear of them, they should not leave the cremation ground. They must consider the forests and hills as being places of death for those who are afraid of tigers, and the graveyard as being the place of death for those who are afraid of ghosts. But until they have got rid of fear in whatever it is they are afraid of, they must not leave so that the fear could laugh and make a mockery of them, for this would make them ashamed of themselves for the rest of their lives without having any way to right themselves.”

“If one has respect for oneself and for the religion (Sāsana) in a true- hearted way, one must not let all sorts of fears arise and lie there where they can excrete their filth down over the heart. One must quickly grab them and pull them down and trample on them and destroy them by work and effort which is replete with patient endurance.”

“One who is afraid of death will be accompanied by death through various future lives without seeing an end of it; and one who is afraid of tigers will always have images of tigers coming to deceive him and frighten him. It is similar with one who is afraid of ghosts, for he will have images of ghosts of various kinds coming to deceive him wherever he goes, until he cannot live, eat, lie down or sleep in peace. Even if he happens to see a leaf fall from a tree, his thoughts would deceive him into thinking that it was a ghost coming to haunt him, and this does happen. One is a false person and one’s timidity and fear spoil oneself. Wherever one goes or stays one is bound to be timid and mistrustful due to the fear which the citta thinks up and imagines to deceive itself. Then one cannot find anything that is genuine and true at all.”

“However frightened the heart may be, a person must learn to face up to fear by the methods of testing and disciplining himself until he gets to know the truth about fear. If he is afraid of tigers he must learn and get to know this fear of tigers by experience, by means of mindfulness and wisdom supported by patient endurance; until a bold fearlessness arises and he can jump up and go looking for the tiger, while the tiger is not bold enough to do anything about it!”

“If he is afraid of ghosts he must learn and get to know about his own fear and about ghosts and what in fact ghosts really are. In truth the ghost is nothing but his own heart which haunts him with his own thoughts which make him afraid. Ghosts live with ghosts, people live with people and they do not interfere with each other. If he examines this thoroughly he should just live in peace. But he must not restlessly agitate his heart — for what do you think — would it be happiness? Why then do those who practise the way not know that the citta deceives them, and if they don’t know this, how can they get to know the true meaning of Dhamma?”

“I have been practising the way for a long time, for forty or fifty years or more. Fear, I have been afraid; Boldness, I have been bold; Love, I have loved; Hate, I have hated; Detestation, I have detested; Anger, I have been angry — all this because I have a heart, I am not a dead man, or monk. But I have tried with my utmost ability to train myself without ever slipping back or giving way. Those things which used to be in charge and overpowering crumbled away under the power of the work and diligence of the one who is not afraid to die. Nothing can get into my heart and hide there secretly

and unnoticed, and wherever I stay I live easy without any worry. Nothing comes now in the way it used to, to stir up and cause the fallacies of fear, boldness, love, hate, detestation and anger to arise, which are all involved in the mass of fire of the kilesas which burn the heart.”

“What else could bring this result about but the training and discipline of the heart to make it live in submission to reason, which is the ‘meaning’ of ‘Dhamma’. All of you who have come here for teaching with the desire of eliminating all kilesas of every kind, by what means will you do this if not by training and disciplining yourselves with work and effort as already mentioned. To bring about the ending of all kilesas, such as fear for exam- ple, there is only this one way in which you must train and discipline your hearts that are at present wantonly playing and arrogantly running after emotionally exciting things (ārammaṇa) which they arouse to think about and imagine, to deceive yourselves. The Lord Buddha and all the Sāvakas were able to gain freedom from all ‘Dukkha’, only by this one way of train- ing and disciplining the heart and there is no other way that is adequate to enable us to escape.”

“As for waiting for fear, laziness and feebleness to clear the way for getting free from Dukkha, this you should never expect. For in a while you would die, empty and putrescent, a stain on the religion and a bad smell also; and do not entertain doubt for a long time, it wastes a lot of time use- lessly. The Dhamma of the Lord Buddha is not a Dhamma that pets you and treats you gently and softly and deceitfully. But if anyone has faith in the reasoning which the Lord has given us and is dedicated to the practice of it in such a way that he is ready to give his life for it without the slightest