Of the 203 women in the research population, more than half (103) reported that they had suffered physical abuse in the form of assault, rape, robbery, hijacking, kidnapping, or forced prostitution.
Murders, too, were reported.
These are the women’s stories: (When women shared similar stories, the number is placed is brackets)
Assault
• I was/am beaten regularly by my husband/boyfriend (21)
• I suffered brain damage after I was beaten by my husband/boyfriend (2)
• I was beaten by my boyfriend who also burnt down my house (3)
• I was beaten by my child who also burnt down my house (1)
• I was forced by my husband to have sex against my will (3)
• I was beaten by my husband and chased out of the house (5)
• I found out that I was divorced only after the divorce had been Square, New York: New York University Press, 2000), pp 20-34.
242 Isherwood & Stuart, op cit, p 84.
243 Isherwood, op cit, p 21.
244 Ibid, p 23.
168 granted by the court (3)
• My child was beaten by my boyfriend (3)
• I was beaten by my mother as a grown-up (2)
• I was beaten by my stepmother as a grown-up (1)
• I was bitten by my mother as a grown-up (1)
• I was pulled with a rope around my neck through the street by my brother until I gave him my pension payout (1)
• I fear for my life after I have reported corruption at work (1)
• I am afraid that, although I came for my toes to be separated, the hospital is going to cut off my leg (1)
Rape
• My son was raped by my husband (1)
• My daughter was raped by my brother (1)
• I was beaten and raped by an unknown rapist (6)
• I was raped by a person known to me (4)
• I was raped by my employer (3)
• I was raped by somebody who pretended that he could give me a job (1)
• I was raped by a gang of unknown rapists (7)
• I was raped by two men while working as a domestic worker in the house of my employer (1)
• I contracted the HI virus after I had been raped (4)
• I was sexually abused as child by a male family member (7)
Robbery
• I was beaten and robbed by an unknown person (5)
Hi-jacking
• I was hi-jacked while travelling in a car (4)
169 Kidnapping
• I was kidnapped as a child by another woman and had to work for her like a slave (1)
Forced prostitution
• I was forced to work as a prostitute by my father (1)
Murder
• My mother, a domestic worker, had been bitten to death by her employer’s dog (1)
• I have witnessed the murder of a nearby family member (5)
• My son was killed at school (3)
Of the 67 men of the research population
• one gay man reported that he was raped by another
• two boys reported that they were raped by men
• one boy reported that he saw his father killing his mother
• one boy reported that he saw members of the mafia killing his father
• one boy reported that he had to witness his father raping the domestic worker
• one boy reported that he was assaulted by gangsters on his way back from school
• one middle aged man reported that he was assaulted and robbed by gangsters
• three men reported that they have beaten their wives/girlfriends
• one man reported that he was afraid that the doctor was going to “reposition his testicles”
Do people living in South African townships have the same opportunities to use their bodies as sites of resistance and
170 transformation as women from the First World? How can township women liberate their bodies, their most intimate space? Can they be empowered by the same Body Theology as their affluent white sisters in Europe, America and New Zealand?
We should first listen to township women’s reconstructed discourses before making a few comments on a Body Theology for township people:
• I’ll move on to a relationship where I feel safe.
• My husband and I have worked together to invite healing into our relationship.
• My husband left me with four children; I will pray to God to give me somebody who will carry this with me.
• I’ll venture into a new relationship with realistic expectations this time.
• I’ll make healthy decisions about my body in future.
• I am the caretaker of my own body.
• I am strong when I am connected with God.
Township boys and men offer the following reconstructed discourses:
• I shall keep to places where I as a boy feel safe from rape.
• I shall work with my wife to eliminate the things which make me so angry that I abuse her.
Lisa Isherwood wrote an excellent book on Body Theology.
However, it hardly mentions physical abuse against women (and men). Township people - actually, more than half of the research population who consist of black, white, coloured and Indian people - seriously have to consider the reality of abuse against their bodies.
However, they are not going to do that outside of their relationships.
In counselling, then, the research population preferred to reconstruct
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• the body as the site of healthy relationships
• the body as the site of teaching each other respect
• the body as the communal concern of the whole family
• the body as liberated through liturgical dancing and praising God
In summary. In search of safety from physical abuse, the body enters into a process of healing, which includes
• the cleansing of oneself from feelings of hatred and resentment,
• the restoring of relationships,
• and an invitation to God to oversee the process.
Journeying with stories
(2/25) Limakatso has to run in her nighty
Limakatso attended counselling on 12th September 2001. It was already three years since her husband had lost his job. Since then he has physically abused her and their three children, aged 19, 14 and 8.
One night she had to run out into the street in her nighty to escape being killed. This was a very painful experience. “That night I wanted to give up,” Limakatso says. “I only reminded myself: Jesus never gave up. That was all that kept me going.”
Limakatso understands her husband’s pain, the pain which came to stay with him since he has lost his job. Yet she asks: “Why may a man pass on his pain to his wife?”
Limakatso got a Protection Order against her husband, but that was not really the way she wanted to go. She wanted to discuss things with him, but he remained silent. She wanted to pray with him, but he did not want to go to church and ridiculed her praying. However, Limakatso’s faith remains a strong support system. As her husband passes on his pain to her, Jesus passes on his love to her.
Limakatso decided to call in the family to help solve the problem. She asked her cousin to speak to him. We also wrote a letter to her
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husband, inviting him to join the counselling process as a significant other.
Neither Limakatso nor her husband attended any further counselling sessions. Hope remains that they have found an inbetween between abusive, patriarchal ways of solving their problems and handling their pain on the one hand, and separating from one another on the other.