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You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 6 includes a quote from It Can't Happen Here FZ: And now folks, it's time for Don Pardo to deliver our special Illinois Enema Bandit-type announcement. Take it away, Don! Don Pardo: This is a true story about a famous criminal from right around Chicago. This is the story of Michael Kenyon, a man who's serving time at this very moment for the crime of armed robbery. It so happens, that at the time of these robberies, Michael decided to give his female victims a little enema --apparently, there was no law against that. But his name lives on --Michael Kenyon, THE ILLINOIS ENEMA BANDIT!

The Illinois Enema Bandit I heard he's on the loose I heard he's on the loose Lord, the pitiful screams

Of all them college-educated women . . . He'd just be tyin' 'em up

(They'd be all bound down!)

Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

The Illinois Enema Bandit I heard it on the news I heard it on the news

Bloomington Illinois . . . he has caused some alarm Just sneakin' around there

From farm to farm He's got a rubberized bag And a hose on his arm

Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump That he just might wanna pump Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump That he just might wanna pump Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump That he just might wanna pump

The Illinois Enema Bandit One day he'll have to pay Some day he'll have to pay

The police will say, "You're under arrest!" And the judge would have him for a special guest Then the D.A. will order a secret test

Stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest Then they'll put out a call-yooou! for the jury folks (That's you over there)

And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokes!" Then they'll drag in the bandit for all to see, Sayin' "Don't nobody, no no, have no sympathy . . . HOT SOAPY WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"

And then the Bandit might say, "Why is everybody lookin' at me?"

DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?

WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS KINDA MISERY? WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY? Well, one girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"

BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY? BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?

TELL ME NOW, WHAT'S YOUR PLEA? Another girl shout: "Let the fiend go free!"

ARE YOU GUILTY? BANDIT, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS? COME ON, NOW

He said, "It must be just what they all need . . . " "It must be just what they all need . . . " (That's right!)

"It must be just what they all need . . . " (Over there)

"It must be just what they all need . . . " (Help me out now!)

"It must be just what they all need . . . " (That's right)

"It must be just what they all need . . . "

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "Don't you know it must be just what they all need . . . " (That's it!)

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "It must be just what they all need . . . "

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "It must be just what they all need . . . "

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "It must be just what they all need . . . "

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "Don't you know it must be just what they all need . . . " The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "It must be just what they all need . . . "

The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "It must be just what they all need . . . "

The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla "It must be just what they all need . . . "

The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

He just be . . . hey!

Talkin' bout the Illinois . . . Illinois . . .

Ain't talkin' 'bout Fontana . . . ha . . . Ain't talkin' 'bout Po-head-otated . . . ha . . . (I'll try again . . . )

Potato Headed Bobby

Talkin' 'bout the Illinois Enema Bandit Yeah yeah yeah

FZ: Wait a minute, this is for Roy Estrada, wherever he's Wanna-wanna-wannanenema An enema Wanna-wanna-wannanenema An enema I wanna-wanna-wannanenema Eh . . . Take it away!

The Illinois Enema Bandit (The Enema Bandit) The Enema Bandit (The Enema Bandit) The Enema Bandit

Talkin' bout the Illinois Enema Bandit . . . ( . . . It can't happen here!)

Juice!

FZ: Awright-awright! Ray White, the assistant Illinois Enema Bandit, live on stage here in New York . . . ! That's it . . . sit right down and make yourselves comfortable . . .

disc 2

1. I'm The Slime

Over-Nite Sensation

You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 1 One . . . Two . . . Three . . . Four

Alright

I am gross and perverted I'm obsessed and deranged I have existed for years But very little has changed.

I'm the tool of the government And industry too,

For I am destined to rule And regulate you.

I might be vile and pernicious But you can't look away. I make you think I'm delicious With the stuff that I say.

I'm the best you can get. Have you guessed me yet?

I am the slime oozin' out from your . . .

Take it away Don Pardo

YOU WILL OBEY ME WHILE I LEAD YOU AND EAT THE GARBAGE THAT I FEED YOU UNTIL THE DAY THAT WE DON'T NEED YOU

DON'T GO FOR HELP NO-ONE WILL HEED YOU YOUR MIND IS TOTALLY CONTROLLED IT IS STUFFED INTO MY MOLD

AND YOU WILL DO AS YOU ARE TOLD UNTIL THE RIGHTS TO YOU ARE SOLD!

TAKE IT AWAY, FRANK!

Thanks, Don!

That's right folks . . . Don't touch that dial.

I am the slime from your video Oozin' along on your livin' room floor I am the slime from your video (NO, FRANK! I'M THE SLIME!)

You can't stop the slime, people, look at me go. (I'M THE SLIME, I AM THE SLIME) I am the slime from your video Oozin' along on your livin' room floor I am the slime from your video

You can't stop the slime, people, look at me go.

HA HA HA HA HA! BWAH HA HAH! BWAH HA HAH! (Who was that?)

2. Pound For A Brown