La crítica orteguiana del liberalismo abstracto

Cash money. Cash from racketeering, kidnapping, drugs,³³⁹ but here we are talking about prostitution. How do you wash that that filthy lucre? Instead you could keep it under you mattress or fuck it all away in luxury items and other flash, but only an idiot would do that, at least do it exclusively.³⁴⁰ Now you could reinvest it in other illicit activities, and this is not necessarily a bad idea, but you are still going to need clean cash if you intend on putting it into a financial institution at the end of the day with an eye toward furthering it by other legitimate means. The problem is that bankers raise eyebrows when you come in with a wheelbarrow of wrinkled, discolored and sometimes bloodstained money. So Mr…Dazzle Razzle…You work at Walmart, but you can’t seem to manage proof of that. You have an account with us, but you cash your cheques with, as you say, ‘shady Chinamen that take a big skim.’ You continue to do so and then you sit on it until you feel that you have enough for you to be able to walk in here and make a deposit with some dignity. That’s why the amounts are so high and in cash. Oh, and sometimes you do a lot of overtime, but basically you make nothing and feel ashamed to come in here on payday to cash such paltry amounts. Did I get all that right? Hey Tom, come over here. You gotta listen to this guy. Ya, Charles, I heard. Sounds pretty odd. Why is he wearing a fur coat though? It’s gotta be like 90⁰ in the shade. Not only that, but why does some of this money smell funny?³⁴¹ And, besides the fur coat, what’s that other shit that he’s wearing? I don’t know, Charles. Maybe it’s a black thing.

Launder the money, sucka. Reduce the risk and save face. Banks will be sceptical if you try to bring in money from sources that cannot be verified. So, find a way to make it verifiable.

Simple. Caesar Slick was doing it through The Cow Door and The Good Auspicious Rucky Rotus Petal, I was doing it through The Hairy Crack. How? Through placement, layering, and

integration. This can all be bypassed if you smurf it, but this can be unduly complicated.³⁴² There are many, many other ways as well, but I’m going to keep to the three stage model for the manner in which I did it.

First you need to funnel the money. This the placement stage. The service industry is particularly useful for this because most transactions are cash money. Not only that, but inventory and such are not so relevant. If you are getting a ‘massage’ in The Good Auspicious Rucky Rotus Petal, the only real expense is the time of the girl and some indistinct sense of oil use plus some a roughly static overhead. This works, but you could have more streams of

339 Scams are good too, like White Folks and Blue’s enterprising efforts with property.

340 Find a balance, nigga.

341 Okay, okay. It’s often not literally dirty. Not the money pimps are dealing with. Street corner hustlers, maybe.

But they aren’t stacking Benjamins and have no need for laundering.

342 Smurfing is when you parcel out your amounts in calculated deposits with numerous financial institution, and/or an array of monetary instruments, but this involves strategy to ensure that patterns remain unrecognised by bank administrators or regulators. I don’t like it because, if you get caught, a lot can be investigatively reconstructed. It all looks bad especially when there are offshore accounts involved.

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greater potential for placement. You could be a lot more sophisticated with different types of ventures, but you will get a solid idea of the possibilities from what I did in The Hairy Crack.

The Hairy Crack is meant to be a classy joint, so I charge $25 entrance. How does anyone know how many people have come in? All I have is a bunch of torn-up ticket stubs on hand if anyone asks. Also, I have it structured so that the strippers pay $100 entrance and they keep all the money from dancing. Effectively, they appear to be freelance so I don’t have to keep accounts for them, and obviously I’m claiming a hell of a lot more girls are coming in than actually do.

The only other documentation is a rudimentary schedule of who’s on stage at what time, but there could conceivably be many, many more girls in there working the floors and supposedly paying a higher rate. In fact, for both the real girls and the fictitious ones, if they come in just to work the floors, then it $150. Again, I have created many streams of possible money that cannot be easily traced. But that’s not it.

Drinks. I have fluctuating prices for drinks. Depends on the hour and the day, but they are always high. The units are discrete, the numbers generated in terms of money are plastic. Easy.

Especially with liquor. I just register a number of units being sold. Who fucking cares? Even when a transaction is taking place in reality there is a skim.³⁴³ Now, even with that, bottle depletion is only an estimate. Besides, and most importantly, if I order x crates of y, I only need to have legitimately purchased x. How I shifted y can be fabricated. I can just say I sold so much Hennessey. Doesn’t need to physically exist in my inventory anyway. I often buy it and sell it to another bar where I take a small hit on the transaction, but I don’t take a receipt. The only receipt is that I bought x units of booze and that I’ve claimed that I have sold for z.

So that’s how I get the money in from my hoes. But the process is not complete.

The second stage is layering. Now you could just use a shell company, but it should do some legitimate business. The Hairy Crack would probably have a pretty healthy balance sheet if I didn’t fuck with it quite so much. There were a lot of legitimate streams of revenue coming in.

Entrances fees, drinks, private events. It was a popular enough place anyway. If a pig came in off the street, he could see that legitimate business was taking place. Besides, I’d get a bitch to rub on his nuts and show him a good time.³⁴⁴ Now we’ve mixed the dirty money with the clean, as I’ve effectively already addressed. Now we’re almost there.

Now we integrate it. This means we return it to normal circulation. This can be done through traditional bank accounts or more elaborate financial vehicles. I will get into this a bit more later on, and, despite what I said, you’ll see how I actually prefer being outside of the pale when

343 The girls are typically using high pressure tactics to get suckers to buy them drinks. Oh, I’d like a shot of tequila or a gin and tonic. Right, when agreed, the bartender gives her water or ice tea and she gets a cut. Besides, no matter how much cocaine a bitch does, she can’t drink all night like a sailor.

344 It’s also good to try to document this because you can extort him later. Pigs might be big cunts, but often their hunger for cunt is bigger. Often they are just pussies when you jeopardize their home lives and threaten to drag them through the mire. They tend to wallow in this kind of shit.

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it comes to other shit beyond banking.³⁴⁵ The money is now clean and accounted for. No problem.

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345 I prefer Ponzi schemes and I think pensions are for suckers. This will make sense when you get to further econopimpics. Anyway, I also I ran a charity that I laundered my money through called D.I.R.T.I.E.S (Dignity and Integrity for Retards, Idiots and Elderly Thalidomide Survivors—of course the acronym can’t be in the correct order because of the theme). The beauty about the charity is that the recipients are so fucked up they can neither say yea nor nay as to whether they received either money or have benefited in any tangible way. It’s easier than taking candy from a baby, or perhaps a mongoloid.

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