When a human being is feeling insecure or lacks confidence, a number of subtle signals reveal the feeling or mood. One of these indicators is lack of eye contact. Confident people will look you in the eye, whereas those who lack confidence and security may look elsewhere. You should pay attention to loss of eye contact (excluding Asian cultures, where lack of eye contact is more a sign of respect than avoidance). Poker players wearing dark glasses while playing don’t have to worry about where they’re looking, blink frequency, and other eye tells. This has the added advantage of preventing players from observing you while you observe them.
When a player tries to remain cool under pressure, his anxiety or apprehension often leaks out. Be on the lookout for unnecessary adjustments of clothing or jewelry. This takes the form of winding watches and rotating rings, necklaces, chains, earrings, etc. Does he engage in this behavior only when concerned or is it a constant mannerism?
Also watch for unnecessary activities that indicate insecurity, such as checking the contents of a wallet (several times), clasping hands together, rubbing the back of the hand, playing with buttons, zippers, chips, or holding something in front of himself that acts as a security blanket. Once again, it’s the pattern that reveals the tell. Does the player use security gestures all the time, or only when under increased stress?
Another strong indicator to look for is frustration. Watch for rubbing the back of the neck, throat, or shoulders, or gently slapping the forehead (which can often be construed as a bad play or frustration with the cards dealt).
In this picture, the player indicates frustration as he exhales, rubs the back of his neck, and moves away from the cards.
Hand and Thumb Gestures
Scientists have noted that there are more connections between the hands and the brain than between any other parts of the body. Because our hands, like our faces, are easily visible, signals are easily detected if we pay attention to them.
Rubbing the palms together is a way in which people subconsciously communicate positive expectation. Pay particular attention to the speed in which a person rubs his palms together. The quicker the speed, the greater the excitement. Not long ago, I observed a celebrity poker match in which one player, holding AKs pre-flop, rubbed his palms together while engaging in an authentic smile. His body language told me he was holding strong cards and this impression was reinforced by a lift in his mood, sitting closer to his cards and looking at his chips, pondering his bet. The shuffle in the seat by moving forward indicated high-level confidence. This behavior was totally different from the last hand dealt to him. His behavior told me what was going on, not the cards.
Rubbing palms together is an example of positive expectation. Usually, when people talk about winning the lottery or coming into money, they rub their palms together. This could illustrate a strong hand and high confidence.
A variation of positive expectation is rubbing the open palms together. This is a high-confidence gesture indicating positive thoughts. This is usually accompanied by a smile, also exhibiting positive expectation. The player In the above image is very confident and self-assured.
Hand Clenching
This is an interesting behavior to identify; it’s often confused with a steeple gesture, which indicates confidence. The typical hand-clenching gesture is where the hands are cupped into each other in front of the person. A variation on hand-clenching is where the fingers are interlaced. I saw a player do this while watching a televised tournament recently. The problem was that it looked like his hands were fused or glued together. More visible was that his hands were turning white from the pressure (lack of blood circulation). This was a masking behavior. Generally, hand- clenching indicates a restrained, anxious, or negative attitude. It’s also accompanied with a false smile, which belies a person’s real feelings.
Generally, the hands are clenched in front of the face, resting on the poker table, or resting in the lap. It’s been discovered that there is a correlation between the height at which the hands are held and the degree of the person’s frustration. A person is often more difficult to deal with when his hands are held high in front of him. A good way to open him up is to hand him something or offer him a drink.
The Steeple
This is where the fingers of one hand lightly press against those of the other hand to form a church steeple. The steeple gesture is frequently used to display confidence and a self-assured attitude, and is often associated with smugness or arrogance. The higher the steeple, the more confident the person. This is particularly useful when playing poker. I remember watching a woman player smile during the flop, move forward, then engage in a high-steeple gesture (indicating confidence) during a tournament. All this should have been obvious to the other players, but no one noticed. Not surprisingly, the woman won the pot.
Steepling is an indication of confidence. The higher the steeple, the more confident the person. This could indicate a strong hand.
It’s important here not to confuse the steeple gesture with a praying gesture. Steepling indicates confidence, while the praying gesture often indicates hope or wishing for something. Pay attention to when a person places his clasped hands in front of his mouth or when his fingers or hands are placed across his mouth, especially if he’s talking to you. This indicates either deception, or he doesn’t believe what he’s saying. Most children, when they lie, place their hands over their mouth, or cover their mouth altogether. In adulthood, we often engage in a hand-to-face gesture when we lie and at the last moment perform a diversion, such as a cursory rubbing of the nose or touching the face or ear. So be on the lookout for nose tugging, ear pulling, or eye rubbing. These often indicate anxiety and deception.
Be aware of blocking gestures, especially when someone places either his hands or fingers across the lips or mouth. When someone is engaging in blocking gestures while talking, you should pay particular attention. Blocking gestures are associated with doubt, uncertainty, or exaggeration. This was the position that Bill Clinton adopted when responding to questions about Monica Lewinski.
This position is also indicative of withholding information.
In one poker tournament, I noticed one of the better players place his head in his cupped palms and look down at the table. His palms were also covering his mouth and by looking at the table, other players couldn’t see his eyes. He engaged in this position every time like clockwork, but when he was confident, his blink rate increased threefold! Even though he tried to conceal and disguise his excitement, his body language gave him away every time. One astute player, noticing the pattern, realized that this was very valuable information indeed.