SEGUNDA INSTANCIA

Data on the teachers’ overall opinions of NVC came from the final QLC session, as well as the final interviews, where the teachers expressed how certain aspects of NVC and the group work had enriched their lives. All the teachers reported that their experiences of

learning NVC were positive. The comments teachers gave centred on the benefit of using NVC to create stronger interpersonal relationships with their students, increase their own self-analysis, and emotional awareness, as well as to avoid judgements inside of the classroom. Reflecting on his overall impressions of NVC, Jake stated:

The main way I've incorporated it is sort of as a reflective tool, I haven't necessarily adapted my practice over the course of the study that much. I’ve used it and there have been some slight adaptations … but overall it has helped me to reflect on my emotional

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response to students … I’ve used it most when students aren’t necessarily engaging in learning in the way I would like them to.

Extending on his comment regarding NVCs effect on his emotional response to students, Jake stated:

I think its effect on my emotional awareness has probably been quite significant. It has helped me to clarify what is going on inside of myself and understand what might be going on inside of my students … I almost need to be able to be empathetic towards myself before I can empathise with others.

Jake then went on to say that his students reacted well during the times he applied NVC in the classroom:

They’ve reacted quite well … better than I thought … they didn’t challenge my use of NVC, they responded in a positive way to the NVC language … [With NVC] you can form non-hierarchical relationships with students and I think that is a much stronger and more powerful way to work with them.

Jake’s description of how NVC had helped him to become more reflective was also echoed by Michael. In expressing his opinion on NVC, he said:

I’ve really enjoyed this group. I don’t think I’ve progressed much in the way I talk ... I knew a bit of NVC before, but just the basics without applying, and now I’m much faster at analysing … I’m able to analyse the situations and myself better … I'm more aware of the emotions and where they’re coming from and what they're driving me to.

Michael went onto say that he has found NVC to be particularly useful in conflict situations, stating:

It’s useful for all sorts of misunderstandings, conflicts or tensions. Where there is a problem, is when I’ve found NVC to be useful, even if in some cases I haven’t used it during that moment. Afterwards I’ve reflected on the situation and thought, of course it would have worked, I'm convinced it would have been efficient [in that moment] … I think I would recommend it for something that I’m not doing yet, which is to use it so much in our day to day practice that we are modelling it, and through this modelling, our students are learning it too.

When asked how his students had reacted to his use of NVC, Michael reported that he thought it had been minimal, because he had not trialled the approach enough:

In my classes not much because I didn't make it very clear … I haven't used it enough for them to get into it … but at least I got the message across that there are better ways to interact, especially with more of the senior students I teach. I've shared it with several of them and there is one girl whose father knows about NVC and she's totally convinced that it’s fantastic and really helps and I’ve realised that she’s using NVC all the time without us even noticing.

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In contrast to Jake and Michael who had primarily used NVC as a reflective tool, Peter had trialled the approach many times within the classroom on an individual and group basis. In outlining his experience of NVC, Peter stated:

My experience of NVC is that it is a really good way to make deep relationships with what could be difficult kids, as opposed to entering combative relationships.

I think NVC is another process to use to connect with people and myself empathically.

It helps to by-pass anger and I am way more mindful of what is going on in my students

… Rather than thinking this student is being bad and annoying and is trying to wreck my class, I now think that they probably need some empathy because something is not going right for them … NVC [also] provides a rationale that teachers can buy into, which is creating positive relationships.

In describing the types of situations for which NVC had been useful for, Peter stated:

I use it to manage situations that aren’t meeting my needs … in every class there are one or two students who are battling the system and when I talk to them using NVC I feel a sense of engagement with them … Rather than telling off students who are struggling to stay focused, I now have the assumption that they are not getting what they are needing during class … I think it [NVC] is a good approach when there are call-outs at really inappropriate times and when there are disruptive and really unmotivated students.

Peter also described some of his students’ reactions to his use of NVC. He said:

I think the students expect to be yelled at when they are misbehaving and they react really positively when I give empathy to them. [For example], there is this one student whose head was down and didn’t seem to be listening when I talked to him. He’s just hearing, blah blah blah right now. He emotionally checked out of the conversation completely and whatever I say is not getting through ... He’s hearing it all as demand, demand, demand ... Well, that student now, I’m able to have conversations with him.

He’s starting to be honest with me about his conduct in the classroom.

In another example I heard second hand that a student that I teach, who has regular meetings with the assistant principal, said that he quite likes how I interact with him because I try to help him think things through and work them out.

These examples highlight how Peter had used NVC as a tool to form better interpersonal connections with his students on an individual level. Additionally, Peter had also conducted a short survey between the sixth and final QLC. This survey was conducted on his own accord and for ethical reasons the full results cannot be described here. However, Peter did give a generalised account in his own words during his final interview. In this, he outlined how he had surveyed 40 students from three different classes. The purpose of the survey was to gauge whether the students had noticed his use of NVC during class (he described this in the survey) and if they thought it was a good strategy. Peter told me that out of the 40 students, 38 (95%) noticed his usage of NVC, while 2 (5%) did not. In terms of whether the students

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thought this new way of interacting with them was good, 10 students (25%) said ‘definitely’, 23 (57.5%) said ‘yes’, four (10%) said ‘maybe’, one (2.5%) said ‘no’, and two students (5%) had ‘no answer’. Overall, Peter expressed a positive opinion about the results he had received and said he would continue using NVC within his classes.

In terms of Sarah’ experiences, she described her overall thoughts on NVC by saying:

I believe in having empathy with the students and having a connection with each one of them and this [NVC] is a good strategy for that … it provides another method to engage with students in a conversational manner … and helps me analyse these types of

situations and provide the language to facilitate this style of communication.

Sarah’s desire to avoid judgements and communicate with her students in an empathetic way was one of the defining points in her usage of NVC. In telling me about how she incorporated NVC into her practice, she said:

I’m more likely to think about and ask students what they need … while I usually empathise with my students, I’m now directly asking them what they need … and I’m also self-monitoring more whether I’m talking in a judgemental way, as well as

articulating requests in a ‘clean way’ – not as a demand but very specific, as opposed to vague and fuzzy.

When I asked how her students had reacted to her use of NVC, Sarah responded, “positively, though the way I use NVC is similar to how I act, so it is not so out of the ordinary for my students to experience”.

The overall opinions of the teachers on the content of NVC were positive, showing that they valued how it could help them to avoid judgements, create empathy, increase their emotional awareness, as well as foster deeper and more positive relationships. I now turn to the second part of the interview where the teachers outlined their experiences of learning through a QLC model.