…I’ll do what I can.
(DARREN returns from the bathroom.)
DARREN
Waverly, that stall was busy, so I’ll be in the…
(DARREN runs into LISA as she heads to the bar to serve herself drinks.)
DARREN
Oh, hey. How are you doin’?
LISA
Good.
DARREN
Did you see where Waverly went?
LISA Waverly? DARREN Waverly. LISA Waverly… DARREN
Blonde girl. About yay high. Currently experiencing an existential crisis.
LISA
Darren…she left.
DARREN
Alone?
LISA
I don’t think so.
DARREN
Right.
LISA
You want a drink?
DARREN
What’s the strongest thing you got?
LISA
I’ve got something that will put some hair on your chest. Finally.
(LISA pours DARREN a whiskey.)
DARREN
How’s she doing?
LISA
She’s okay.
DARREN
So this guy, is he a, you know…should I call her?
LISA
I’d let her figure this out. If she comes back, you know it’s for real. And if she doesn’t, then it’s probably a sign.
DARREN
What if there are no signs? What if we don’t go after what we want and hold on to what we love, then we end up despondent, defeated and alone?
LISA
Then, I’m fucked.
DARREN
Okay, here’s the drinking game. Every time you regret something, you take a shot.
LISA
How’s whiskey?
(LISA pours two shots of whiskey.)
DARREN
I’ll start. Not reading Catcher In the Rye in high school.
(DARREN slams his shot of whiskey.)
LISA
Quitting piano lessons.
(LISA slams her shot and pours two more.)
DARREN
Second semester, sophomore year of college.
LISA
What about it?
DARREN
The parts I don’t remember.
(DARREN slams his shot.)
LISA
Waiting until I was twenty-four to come out of the closet.
(LISA slams her shot and pours two more.)
DARREN
Not telling Waverly I loved her more often.
(DARREN slams his shot.)
LISA
Oh, shit just got real. So life’s just a bunch of regrets, huh?
DARREN
At least having regrets means you chose something.
LISA
Gives you something to drink over.
(LISA fills up Darren’s glass.)
DARREN
Lisa, do you ever wonder what would have happened if we stayed together?
LISA
A lot.
DARREN
Me too.
LISA
It’s my recurring nightmare.
DARREN
It wouldn’t have been that bad.
LISA
I’m a lesbian!
DARREN
I’m understanding!
LISA
All right, I have one more.
DARREN
Shoot.
LISA
Playing this game with you.
DARREN
It’s gonna be a long night.
LISA
That it is, my friend. That it is.
(They cheers and shoot.) (Blackout.)
SCENE 7: Outside Waverly’s Apartment
(LUKE and WAVERLY come up the stairs laughing and enjoying each other. Both are out of breath.)
LUKE
Hold on, I need a break. If I had known you lived on the fifth floor, I would’ve gone home with someone else.
(LUKE pulls out a cigarette and puts it in his mouth.)
WAVERLY
Let’s go inside.
LUKE
It’s only eleven o’clock. Don’t you want to stay out a little longer?
WAVERLY
Have you not done this before?
LUKE
Not this quickly.
WAVERLY
When I know what I want, I go for it.
(Just as LUKE is lighting the cigarette, she pulls it out of his hands and crushes it.)
WAVERLY
So, do you want to stand out here and talk about our feelings? Or do you want to head inside?
LUKE
I want to head inside, but you’re sorta weirding me out. Usually, I’m trying to get the girl to go home with me, and she wants to find out who I am and how I tick.
WAVERLY
Now you can skip that.
#10 - Don’t Say Another Word (WAVERLY)
LUKE
Don’t you want to know anything about me?
WAVERLY
Nothing.
LUKE
Not one little thing?
WAVERLY
I’m upset I even know your name. Let’s go.
LUKE
You’re a very confusing woman. And I feel like I have a pretty good grasp on women, but this is unlike anything…
WAVERLY
YOU’VE GOT THAT QUIRKY SMILE. YOU’VE GOT THAT CHARMING STARE. YOU’VE GOT THAT WAY YOU TALK SAYS YOU COULD BE FROM ANYWHERE. NO, I DON’T KNOW
EXACTLY WHERE YOU’VE BEEN. I DON’T KNOW ANY DETAILS, SO I’M FILLING THEM ALL IN. DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. DON’T RUIN THE SURPRISE.
I DON’T WANT TO KNOW THE SECRETS THAT ARE LYING IN YOUR EYES.
I DON’T NEED TO SEE THE ANSWERS. I PREFER MY VISION BLURRED. DON’T MOVE.
DON’T SPEAK. DON’T BREATHE.
DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD.
LUKE
There’s gotta be one thing you want to know about me. I ran the 600-meter dash in high school. County Champ. Beat Brad Anderson.
WAVERLY
YOU THINK I’M INSINCERE. I HAVE A GUARDED HEART.
YOU THINK THE THINGS YOU WANT
BUT JUST DON’T RUSH THE GREATEST PART. AND, I KNOW
EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL.
BUT SOMETIMES WHAT YOU IMAGINE
CAN BE BETTER THAN WHAT’S REAL. DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD.
JUST LET ME TAKE YOU IN.
WE’LL HAVE TO FINISH SOMETIME, WE GET ONE CHANCE TO BEGIN. FIND BEAUTY IN THE SILENCE
AND ALTHOUGH IT SOUNDS ABSURD, DON’T MOVE.
DON’T SPEAK. DON’T BREATHE.
DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. RIGHT NOW.
RIGHT HERE.
THERE’S JUST THIS MOMENT BETWEEN YOU AND ME. NO PAST.
NO FEAR. THIS CAN BE
WHAT WE WANT IT TO BE. DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. DON’T WHISPER IN MY EAR.
DON’T TRY TO MAKE UP SOMETHING THAT YOU THINK I WANNA HEAR. ‘CAUSE I’VE HEARD IT ALL BEFORE AND I WAS HURT BY WHAT I HEARD. DON’T MOVE.
DON’T SPEAK. DON’T BREATHE.
DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. DON’T WHISPER IN MY EAR.
DON’T TRY TO MAKE UP SOMETHING THAT YOU THINK I WANNA HEAR. ‘CAUSE I’VE HEARD IT ALL BEFORE AND I WAS HURT BY WHAT I HEARD. DON’T MOVE.
DON’T SPEAK. DON’T BREATHE.
DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD.
DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD. DON’T SAY ANOTHER WORD.
(WAVERLY and LUKE kiss. SHE takes his hand and pulls him inside.) (Blackout)
SCENE 8: Various Locations Around New York City
#11 - We’re Gonna Go Out Reprise (DARREN)
DARREN
I’M GONNA PASS OUT. I’M GONNA TURN IN
AND CHALK THE WHOLE THING UP TO FODDER. I WOULD KILL MY OWN SWEET MOTHER
FOR A FUCKING GLASS OF WATER. CALL IT BAD. CALL IT DUMB. CALL IT WORTHY OF REGRET.
YOU CAN’T REGRET WHAT YOU FORGET. I’M GONNA PASS OUT.
#12 - Hungover (ENSEMBLE)
DARREN
I WAKE UP,
RUB THE SLEEP FROM MY EYES. LOOK AROUND,
AND THEN I REALIZE
THAT I DON’T KNOW WHERE I AM,