Get to know your environment. If you’re looking for a wealthy and sophisticated woman, then you’re probably not going to find her by looking on skid row or picking through a dumpster. You probably have some type of mental picture of what type of woman you’re looking for. Try to categorize her in the sense that would put her in similar places or situations that you might find yourself in. In other words, if you want a woman that keeps in shape, then go to the gym to find her.
The night clubs aren’t always the best places to meet women. As a matter of fact, it really isn’t one of my top suggestions at all. The direction that I have taken in recent years is to join different types of classes. You can take classes in such things as:
• Aerobics
• Self Defense, Karate, Judo • Acting or Drama
• Massage • Dance • Photography • Art or Sculpture • Ceramics
I’ve found that joining these cultural types of classes can be both educational and fun. And they’re a great way to meet women. Some of these classes are free, others may cost money. Regard- less, it’s well worth your while. Remember: Try to stick with the classes where the women outnumber the men. You can usually find these kinds of classes at your local community college or at private schools. The private schools are usually more expensive. Some of the physically-oriented classes may be offered by your own gym or health club. The aerobic classes are a prime example of a place where women outnumber the men. Aerobics classes are also a great way to keep yourself toned as an alternative to some of the weight training exercises. (Mix it up, work the weights one day and work on aerobics the next.)
Maybe taking classes isn’t your style. Then join some type of team: softball, baseball, bowling, soccer, etc. Or perhaps you’re not cut out for intense physical wear. Volunteer yourself to coach some type of team (something you have experience in) such as football, basketball, or hockey. There are always sports groupies
that hang around these kinds of sports, no matter how young or how old the players are.
Also remember that there are lots of single moms out there. Once the word gets out that you’re single, look out! An example of this “single mom thing” happened to a friend of mine. He had recently divorced his wife. They had one child from the marriage. Two days during the week, the father would drop off and pick up the child at the day care facility. The other days the mother would pick up the child. A couple months went by and some of the women at the day care center would ask him about the arrangements that he and his ex-wife had. He explained that they had recently finalized the divorce and that they were sharing custody of the child. That was all it took—getting out the word that he was single. My friend didn’t even realize what happened until he went out with two or three of the single moms. He told me that some of these women would even ask the girls at the day care if they could drop some hints to ask them out on dates. You see, in some situations, you have to put out the word that you are, in fact, very single.
Some of the other examples of possibilities to meet women are:
Coed gyms
This goes without saying. What better place to find a woman who cares about her looks? Most gyms today are coed. Just make sure that the one you join has lots of women.
The perfume counter at major department stores
Have you really looked at some of the women who work in the cosmetics department of some of these stores? A majority of the ones I’ve seen are positively beautiful. It’s part of their job—to look beautiful. Simply approach them when they don’t seem to be busy and say something like this: “It’s my sister’s birthday and I was wondering if you might have any suggestions for a gift?” Then compliment her on how nice she smells or tell her how much you like her earrings. Then, maybe come back the next day and ask her for a date.
Grocery stores
This is where I do most of my shopping for food and women. Grocery stores are an example of a “non-threatening” atmosphere. Women in grocery stores don’t usually expect to be hit on. Be tactful in your approach. Keep your conversations oriented toward cooking and ask her advice on certain recipes. This type of
conversation will definitely help break the ice.
Museums
This is also a great place to meet women. Museums are very popular with the ladies, especially women that are looking for the upper class type man, a man who appreciates the historical and educational things in life.
Tanning salons
You can always meet beautiful women at tanning salons. Some of the women who use these places are models or dancers. Great success stories can be told here.
Seminars
Attend special interest seminars that involve more women than men. Check your local newspaper for a seminar that might fit this category.
The malls
A virtual cavalcade of women, the mall is always very heavily populated with women of all shapes and sizes. Simply ask a pretty woman for directions to a particular store. You can also ask her for advice on what would be a good gift for your sister. Be creative with your approach.
Major department stores
Women frequent the department stores a lot more often than men do. This is an excellent place to meet all sorts of women. In fact, if you’ve got the time and energy and are the adventurous type, get a part-time job there. Simply approach the woman that you’d like to meet and tell her that she looks like she has the same taste in clothing as your sister. Tell her that you are looking to buy a dress for your sister’s birthday. Ask her if she could help you pick
something out. I have a friend that has tried this technique before and he’s actually gotten women to try dresses on for him.
Art galleries
I have met several women in art galleries. Simply glance over at the painting that she’s admiring and make a few comments on it. For instance, tell her you like the color combinations that the painter uses or that you like the artist’s style.
Enrolling in a bartenders school
Another great idea on where to meet lots of women was passed on by a good friend of mine, who’s not the most attractive looking man in the world. He enrolled himself in a Bartenders School for training as a bartender. He did this even though he didn’t need a job. He thought it would be a great way to meet women. Not only did he meet women at the Bartenders School, he ended up getting a part time job at one of the local bars and now he introduces me to women.
Golf lessons
If you like golf, go to the local golf courses and ask the instructors there what the ratio is of men to women. The majority of the time you will find there are far more women taking lessons than men, especially during the weekdays.
Companion columns
Newspapers and local magazines have “900” numbers set up for people to place or respond to ads. If you place the ad, it’s usually free. However, to retrieve your responses, you may have to call a “900” number. To respond to a listing is even easier. All you do is dial the phone number and the listing’s extension, leave a message and pay your phone bill. When she returns you call, you should talk briefly and set up a rendezvous in a public place. Why a public place? Because you can get a visual on her physical appearance before you commit yourself to a “face-to-face.” (Some people can be deceiving when describing themselves over the phone or with touched up photos.) This way you can escape, if necessary, without wasting too much time if you see that she’s not suitable for you.
Last but not least, dating services
Dating services aren’t for everyone. But, if you need something to get you going, to get you out of a rut and back into the swing of things, then this could be an option for you. Unfortunately, these services aren’t free…and they’re not cheap, especially for men. If you do decide to go this route, make sure to check the lists of dateable women. Sometimes these services have a large selection of women; however, they may all be quite a bit older than you’re looking for.
The main thing to keep in mind is that you just need to get out there. Then you will find beautiful women everywhere. So figure out your strategy. Then, you make the first move.
8.
TECHNIQUES
First of all, you need a plan or a strategy before you can determine which direction you’d like to be headed. Get out your list of things that you are looking for in a woman. Then summarize the type of woman you want. Again, I will use this example: If it’s a woman who likes to keep herself in shape, then you’ll probably have the best chances and selection at a health club. Once you’ve made your determination of what type of woman you’re looking for, put yourself in the appropriate atmosphere: health club, grocery store, department store, etc.
Next, you must initiate the conversation. If you wait for her to say something first, it may never happen. So, I suggest that you make the first move. What you say will sometimes depend on where you are. If you are in the grocery store (we’ve talked a little about that), the conversation might start out with which type of potatoes should you use with this T-bone steak, or what kind of seasonings will work best for this chicken?
Openers at the health club may go something like this: Ask her: “How did you get your thigh muscles toned so well…in aerobics? I’ve been thinking about taking an aerobics class. Which one do you think I should start with?” This will definitely get her talking.
Remember this when you can’t think of anything to say: Just start asking simple questions. These could be about anything, such as the weather, the time of day, where she bought something, what she does for jock itch (just kidding), etc.
Most questions require some type of answer. Obviously this is one of the best ways to get her talking.
Another way to initiate a conversation is to simply say, “Hi, how’s your day going?” Give her a compliment on how nice her clothes are, or that you like her shoes, etc.
Using the cliché
My theory on clichés is that most women still respond to them (if tactfully delivered, of course). Remember the old cliché: Haven’t I seen you somewhere before? Instead, you might say: “Didn’t I marry you somewhere before?” Women like it when men are creative and humorous. I have a friend that uses clichés and is constantly having success meeting women. The only thing he does differently is that he substitutes some of the words from the
beautiful music together,” he would say, “We could make beautiful pasta together.” Believe it or not, he picked up a very beautiful woman with that very line. (I was there.) When using a cliché, spice it up with your own imagination.
Don’t be boring
I’ve sat and watched some of the most “glamorous” people in Hollywood carry on the most dull, boring and pathetic lives that I’ve ever witnessed. Some of them are so caught up in talking about themselves that they don’t know the first thing about having fun. These are people who drive Ferraris, have millions of dollars, and act as if they are the talk of the town. Unfortunately, having all the money in the world won’t do you any good if you’re a dull, boring putz. They never seem to live life happily (or to its fullest). To most of the women I know, boring people, no matter how rich they are, are a turn off. Personally, these people bore the hell out of me. Eventually, everyone gets tired of boring people (except other boring people, of course).
I’ve found that taking a woman to lunch is a somewhat innocent, non-threatening way of gradually working your way up to spending more time with her.
Conversation pieces
Wearing conversation pieces (jewelry, etc.), can be a magnet for women to notice you. Occasionally, I’ll wear a pin on the lapel of
my sport coat, one of several different kinds, such as a diamond studded star, a gold and onyx bolt of lightning, a silver and diamond machine gun. Of course, you don’t have to go out and spend a fortune on the real thing. The point is, give her a reason to come to you. If she sees this diamond glaring in her eye across the room, then this could be just the added edge that you need to meet her.
Conversation pieces can also come in the form of a tie, a pair of lizard boots, or a hat. Or, it could be a different category such as a car or a boat.
Subtle persistence
This is one of my favorite techniques. By subtle persistence, I mean that, if you are in a singles bar and women are walking by you, act like you’re not paying attention to them. Obviously your basic instinct is to look at a beautiful woman. Well, this is perfectly natural. But, that’s just what most women expect you to do. You shouldn’t conform to what everyone else is doing. Pretending not to pay attention to her is one technique that has worked for my friends and me. Women seem to like this subtle approach.
So don’t come off like a vulture. Set yourself apart from the other dribbling slobs. Just kick back and let her eyeball you. If she’s interested in you, then I’m sure that sometime during the evening
she will try to cross paths with you. When she does, smile at her and ask to buy her a drink.
When most women go out to the clubs, their idea of having fun is dancing and partying with their girlfriends. They, like anybody else, want to escape from the realities of life and get away from the daily pressures. So be subtle and relaxed when approaching these beauties. Personally, I highly recommend this approach if you think that this may be your dream girl.
Throwing out signals is very important
Probably the most simple signal to use is your smile (Or in Bruce Willis’ case—the smirk). The smile can be very effective when used at the right time. When she returns the smile, you’ve made the initial move. The second move would then be to go over and say hello and give her a compliment of some sort.
Other types of signal can come in the form of using body language. An obvious gesture is to wink at her, but the only time that I might use the wink is when I’ve seen the woman before and I know that I’ll probably see her again (possibly at the grocery store). So when either of us is leaving, I might make some casual eye contact, and give her a brief wink and smile. The next time I see her, she might be a little more responsive toward me and she’ll probably get the hint that I’m interested in her.
Some other obvious body language signals may come in the form of licking your lips, blowing her a kiss, or rolling up you shirt sleeves. (Rolling up your shirt sleeves is supposed to imply that you’re ready for some action, like a rooster that ruffles his feathers.)
Playing the odds
Try this: Each day, approach a woman and ask her for a date, or at least try to let her know that you exist. Don’t be discouraged if you get turned down a few times. Play the odds. No matter who you are, this technique always seems to work.
Compliment her
I don’t care who she is or where she comes from, all women love compliments. This is especially true if the compliment that you give her sounds sincere. “That’s a nice dress, babe.” “Your hair looks great tonight.” “You smell good enough to eat.” Use your imagination, but try to be as honest as possible.
When you’re out driving…
This happens to me almost every day: I’m out driving in my car, I glance over to the car next to me, and there she is, another
beautiful woman. How does one approach such a situation. Well, one way is to motion for her to roll down her window. Then, ask her for a direction to a bar that you know is close by. Next, thank her and ask her if she’d like to join you there for a drink. My
Here is another technique that has worked well for a friend of mine. He bought one of those devices that is similar to a flip chart with a couple of suction cups that go on the car window, and a remote switch. This thing spells out certain phrases and allows you to display them from the car window. When you are stuck in traffic, either on the freeway or at a traffic light, just use a phrase that she can answer with either ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ For example, “I’m headed to happy hour, why don’t you join me?” This technique may not be for everybody, but if you want to take advantage of every opportunity, give it a try. Just a word of caution on picking up women that are driving in cars. On a couple of different
occasions, the women that looked excellent while seated in the car, certainly looked different when they stepped out. That pretty little innocent face was supported by a cross between a gorilla and a giant bowling pin. Just look as closely as you can, or take a chance.
When you finally do find your woman, take an interest in some of the things she finds interesting.
No, I’m not talking about wearing a dress or going to a baby shower. For instance, if she’s interested in art, keep an eye open for art exhibits. Check your local newspaper or call the art galleries in your area for information. She may be interested in horses. If so, then find out where and when the next equestrian event is. Women