Considering logistics is incredibly important for a guy who wants to get laid a lot. Logistics are a major reason why a lot of guys don’t get laid. You can play your game absolutely
perfectly, but if you don’t plan your logistics right, you’re not going to get laid. I’m always baffled at how many guys don’t think of this stuff and blow great opportunities for sex time and time again.
But obviously, you’re not going to be that guy. That’s because I’m about to break down the way you should plan for logistics that will not only eliminate any chance of you not getting laid, but will actually make it way easier.
A lot of guys think that if a girl is into you, then it’s automatic that she will be going home with you. The thing is, there are certain situations where you can kind of keep things going but you have to have common sense. For example, if I'm trying to get this girl to come back to my house, it's two hours away, does it make a lot of sense that she's going to come two hours at 4:00 am or 2:00 am when the clubs close and then she has to go back another two hours. No, that doesn’t make any sense.
Sure, I’ve heard stories of girls living seven hours away that drove down just for a night of sex with a guy that she was obsessing over. But, that’s now normal. If you’ve seen the movie, He's Just Not That Into You, there’s a great line in the movie that goes, "It's the exception, not the rule." Someone managed to do it once, great for them, good job, I guarantee that you're not doing it consistently - it's an exception.
The first step of logistics is isolation. So many students do not isolate. It drives me insane every time I teach a program. It’s amazing how few guys actually get into a one- on-one conversation with a girl, away from her friends. Some guys even try to make out with her in front of everyone, which frequently makes the group uncomfortable. As much as her friends love you, when you're a stranger making out with her in front of them, it's going to make them uncomfortable. Sometimes it may be OK, but it’s an exception, not the rule.
But here’s the BIG problem with that. And believe me, I know because I used to always go into venues and try to make out with chicks as soon as possible. If I make out with a girl in 10 minutes in front of her friends, when I'm trying to get that girl to come home with me later, those friends are going to be all over it. They are going to know exactly what's going on,
because we started making out really fast, so obviously they know I'm trying to fuck their friend and will not comply.
What you should do is, after you've got the girl into position where you can actually do something sexual with her create a plan in your mind. Where can we possibly have sex? Where are those locations?
So you'd have ONE location … could be your apartment, or your home, and set that in mind. Then location 2, which might be an in-venue lay, and then potential third location would be like a friend's house that's, or what have you. Once you've outlined the entire possibilities of where you can actually close and seal the deal, then when you’re talking to that girl, once
you've isolated her, you need to be thinking, which of these three is most likely to be one that I'm going to get the event to happen at.
That doesn’t mean you should disregard the other two, because again, it’s very
important that to maintain flexibility. I might be pitching to go to my house because it makes sense, it's comfortable. So if I finally find out because actually she's really, really freaky, she's willing to doing something right now, and she lives a long way from where I live, so I will have a logistical issue once I get to my house with her maybe wanting to leave early, it might make sense to just go for it and do it in-venue.
Then again, if not, and I want to have a full plan of how will I actually get to leave the nightclub, how will I get from the nightclub to my house, what is that logistical funnel that I'm going to be feeding her through to get to the result that I want?
So your first move is isolation. Isolation is super easy. You just need an excuse. "Hey, it's too hot in here … it's too cold … let's go grab a seat. I'm going to go outside and smoke a cigarette." Let's go grab a drink, let's go find my friends." “The music is too loud, I can't hear you.” This is pretty easy – just say something to isolate her. The trick is to give her a reason for isolation. Don’t just say, “Hey come talk to me in this corner.” You need to create some kind of reason, and it doesn’t even have to be that good.
In 1975, Stanley Milgram did a test on the New York subway, looking into how he could get compliance from people. What he found was that if you just ask someone a question, you're very unlikely to get the response you want. For example, he was saying, "Would you mind if I sit down?" And everyone is like, "No." But as soon as he gave that reason, it jumped from 80 percent of people saying no, to 80 percent of people saying yes, and it didn’t even matter what the reason was. It didn’t have to be believable.
At one point, he was like, "Do you mind if I take that seat because I really need to sit down." That's not a very good reason, “because I really need to sit down,” but just adding that reason, meant that they would be absolutely okay in giving up that seat. So, it's the same thing with isolation. As soon as you add that justified reason, you're essentially performing that same psychological experiment from the 70s in giving a reason of why they should be compliant.
So once you’re in isolation, you should really start nailing down logistics. Where is the best place to go next that will result in sex? One thing that guys do - that I’m not the biggest fan of - is pulling a girl out of the venue to go grab food. I hate pulling girls for food, because I just feel like it kills the sexy vibe, it's bright in the food place, she's eating, now she feels a little self-conscious about eating, maybe she's eating garlic, or she's now full, it kills another hour of time which means it's later, which means the time that she has to get up is getting closer, you still have to get back to the house. So I never opt for food.
I want an activity that socially sounds acceptable, but really sub-textually means we're going to have sex. So things like, we're having an after-party back at mine, or “you've got to check out the view from my balcony,” or “we are going to go in the Jacuzzi back at my
apartment,“ of “let's go have a glass of champagne.” Things that really sub-textually suggest what's going to happen if they come with me, but socially don’t scream "Hey, let's go fuck."
That's really important because you need to have that social idea of cognitive dissonance.
How about some other logistical situations that you may think are obvious but you would be surprised as to how many guys overlook them? For one, make sure you have
condoms (and really, you’re an idiot if you’re having promiscuous sex and don’t use condoms – you’re playing Russian roulette with your life). Next, make sure you have transportation –
you’ve got to know how you're going to get where you're going next. If you're in a city like New York, where there is a lot of public transportation, you have to know when those trains are running and you have to know where you can get a cab. You don’t want to be spending time trying to keep the girls entertained as you're trying to flag down a cab on a busy street. I've had so many situations like that.
Keeping that in mind, don’t risk losing attraction to try and keep logistics. For example, if you know that the trains leave every hour on the hour—not every hour but every half hour additionally, if you know that the way you're moving you're going to miss the train, don’t try and rush her. Don’t be like, "Come we've got to go, we're going to miss the train." Instead relax, do the opposite, allow it to pass and get on the next train.
Figure out who drove, because who drove is going to give you a major indication of the logistics. One of the key logistics gathering questions I always ask is, "How did you guys get here? Did you guys meet here, or did you come together?" I want to know who drove in that group. I want it to be that my girl came with her friends, she didn’t drive, and she lives
separately from them, etc. This way, at the end of the night I can get her and know exactly how her logistics work out without having to scramble and find a solution.
So if she drove by herself to meet her friends at a bar, that's the ideal logistics, because then at the end of the night she can get in her car and drive home, or follow me over to my place, and there are no problems. The worst logistics are if she drove and she's the driver for like three other girls that she has to take home. That's going to be a mess.
But if you know that situation is coming early, you can either move on if you’re not looking at seeing this girl beyond the night, or you can have some time to develop a logistical solution. I’ve frequently just whipped out $20 bill and given it to the girls to cover cab fare home. Another thing that I used to do is to get the girls phone number and arrange to go over there later, after she takes her friends home.
You also want to find out what the girl has to do the next day. If they have to be up at 5:00 in the morning for work or something, then you've got a logistical issue that needs to be handled. My friend Adam in England told me a story with a girl that reeked of poor logistics, but that he made something happen with.
He met this girl in a club, a super-hot blond from New York living in London. He got talking to her, and she was like really busy and just one of those girls who works a lot. They made out that night, but she had to take her friend home, and what have you, so he didn’t
chase the logistics that night. He attempted a couple of times to take her out, but she was always busy with work stuff.
He could have thought, maybe there isn't enough attraction here, but instead, he chose to look at what it was. She was a girl, from New York, with a placement in London. It was a temporary placement and she was doing it to further her career. Knowing the intensity of the financial marketing and that a lot of people do work 12-hour days, it's not unlikely that she really is busy. So rather than seeing it as her blowing him off, he decided to investigate further, and asked her if she had time in London to see cool things, or what she'd done, and the answer was that she hadn't. So by backing it up with that she hadn't really gotten around to seeing anything, gave him the knowledge that this girl definitely wasn’t going out and was actually working.
So instead, he decided to meet her at lunch time, and started traveling to her
workplace, meeting her where she worked at lunch and having lunch with her. What happened is that over a period of three weeks he became the only male that was willing to put in the time to meet up with this girl. After about three weeks of hanging out with her at lunch time, she felt, obviously, that she wanted to meet with him outside, so she took an afternoon off, and they then spent an entire afternoon at her house which started off watching the movies and ended up with about eight hours in bed.
It was just because he twisted the logistics around and made it so that, logistically, he was the only person in her life.
So staying in a girl’s life, either on the phone or Facebook or whatever can be good if the logistics are not there when you first meet her. Several times, I’ve met girls who kind of has an on again, off again boyfriend, and you call or text her for may be a few weeks and nothing’s really happening because of logistics and then all of a sudden it happens, and you get laid really quickly, and you're like, “what the hell is that sudden shift from you never want to meet up to you're having sex with me in an hour and a half?” I literally asked this to a girl recently.
She responded, "Well I was dating someone." This happened to me maybe 15 times over the years.
You do have to be patient when it comes to logistics. Not everything is going to happen right away. A good general rule is that if you haven’t gotten a girl out on a date within a week or so, and there isn't extenuating circumstances, then you might have a problem, because that's where the cold approaches tend to blur. If it's a social circle, it's completely different because that’s likely someone you're going to see again. With a cold approach, a week is really like the hot-potato time I find, anything more than that, unless you have really good phone game or text game, you're probably going to blur somewhere along the line.
You should also be aware of what type of girl she is before taking her on a date. This will eliminate things like flaking. I knew a pick up artist in L.A. that had this girl who was this earthy kind of hippie chick, who was really hot, and he kept taking her to the Grammy's and the
Oscars, and after a while, she just befriended him because, really she was a girl who just
wanted to go walk around the forest and smoke pot. He kept taking her to all these things that
he thought were impressing her, and really she didn't give a hoot about it. He ended up losing the girl because of that.
You want to make your logistics as enticing for the girl as possible and if I hit a
commonality with a girl, where we have something in common, then that's what I want to make a plan for. If I have something that she's really interested in going to do or see, then that's
where I want to make my plan, because the more enticed she is to do the actual thing, the less she has to like you to actually show up, and then once she shows up, you can get more into it.
Similarly, it’s important to customize logistics so you’re picking up the type of girls you really want. For example, if you’re really into hippie chicks, then you’re probably wasting your time trying to pick up chicks at a club because those aren’t the type of chicks who are going to share a lot of commonalities with you.
I personally like girls who are a little more “out there”, so I like to go to places that are a little more “out there”. I like suicide girl shows and rock shows and that's where I find a lot of the girls that I really get along with. If you're not customizing your logistics of where you're picking up girls to fit the girls you want, then you're really paralyzing your game.
There was a month recently where I slept with three girls who were Playboy and Hawaiian tropics models. Each of them happened in about two hours, because I just kept running into girls that I had a lot in common with who all had a really sarcastic sense of humor, who were kind of mean, and who just happened to be hot. Every now and then, there are girls who you are very physically attracted to, who have the characteristics and qualities that you want, and it's going to be easier to pick those girls up, than it is to pick up a different type of girl.
Another logistical point I want to address is the idea of not making assumptions. Don’t make assumptions about what's going to happen, just try it and then figure it out afterwards.
Too many guys get in trouble because they don’t want to do something wrong, so they don’t do anything at all.
I cannot overstate how bad this is as a sticking point. If you get something unexpected in an interaction with a girl where you don’t know what to do and you leave, or you stand there in silence, both of those are losing moves. We know definitively, that leaving and standing there in silence do not get you laid.
You have to be responsible for not taking the easy way out. I understand, it's scary, there are mass of things going on in your brain, but that's where you need to take a deep breath and try something, ANYTHING. Ask a rapport question or ask the most average Joe question you can because it's better than standing there in silence or leaving.
Finally, I think the biggest thing that's going to help you the most is to be really prepared for when you get them back to your place. I prepare things before I leave. I turn the lights by my front door on full blast, but set my bedroom lights really low. I'd have candles by the side of my bed that wouldn’t be lit, with a lighter next to them. So when I bring a girl back to my
Finally, I think the biggest thing that's going to help you the most is to be really prepared for when you get them back to your place. I prepare things before I leave. I turn the lights by my front door on full blast, but set my bedroom lights really low. I'd have candles by the side of my bed that wouldn’t be lit, with a lighter next to them. So when I bring a girl back to my