Comportamiento simulado del acuífero en escenarios tipo

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Transcript

Grant Adams (Grant): Welcome everybody to the fourth installment of Erotic

Mastery. This is a special call for a couple reasons.

One, our guests once again are incredibly well informed and articulate about our subject. Also I’m calling from my bed. Unfortunately I’m alone. Unfortunately I have the stomach flu.

Fortunately I’m getting a nurse who may be by later to help out. So if I’m a little low on energy tonight, please forgive me. I’m sure Erwan and Alicia will make up for any lack of energy.

This is exciting for me. Erwan and to a little lesser extent Alicia have been doing this kind of work for I think 20 years. When I say this kind of work, I mean a lot of us have interesting jobs, but very few of us teach naked workshops where

couples learn how to give each other deep orgasms.

So I congratulate you guys for an excellent career choice, and we’re going to talk about that. We’re also going to once again connect an idea that’s come up on every single call, which is that who you are outside of sex carries over into a continuum into how good your sex will be, how good it will be for you and how good it will be for your partner.

So first of all I just want to welcome you guys. Erwan and Alicia, welcome!

Erwan Davon (Erwan): Hi Grant.

Alicia Bayer (Alicia): Hi Grant. It’s great to be here.

Grant: It’s great to have you here! The three of us have been talking about this for many many months, and there’s kind of a secret. Again in San Francisco, and there’s a lot going on there clearly, they’ve been working on very small-scale intimate workshops.

I don’t know, guys, if you’ve ever done any kind of national teleconference like this, have you?

Erwan: We’ve never done a national teleconference.

Grant: Yeah, so we’re kind of the first here and I’m kind of glad about that. Your

stuff is too good, honestly, to keep up there in San Francisco.

Now you guys had a chance to listen to Neo’s call, and you really liked it as much as the rest of us did. Do you want to say anything about what really struck you about Neo’s call that you thought was so deeply true?

Erwan: I’ll start and then Alicia, if there’s anything you want to add…what I really liked about Neo’s call was he put a lot of attention away from sort of a very materialist approach to sex and he really focused on what you just addressed, Grant, which was how you’re being, who you’re being, where your attention is is really what’s going to make all the difference.

He said some great things like the three keys which tie all great lovers together of paying attention, taking your time, putting her pleasure first…these are really priceless principles.

Grant: You had something else that you add, I know, which is research. Erwan: That’s right, that’s right, and we’ll probably elaborate on that a bunch on this call. Once you get that sort of basic mindset down, which I think Neo really brilliantly illuminated for us, it opens up the world.

One of the worlds that it opens up is you can actually study and research sensuality. It occurs to people that you can study and research tennis, maybe hire a tennis coach, maybe you hire somebody to help you with your taxes or to go sailing, but you can actually do the same thing in the areas of life that are fun, even the areas of life that are the most fun.

Grant: And this should be one of them.

Alicia: That’s right. This is the one! [laughing]

Erwan: You and us and all the men on the call would probably agree with that.

Grant: Exactly. I like to get everyone agreeing.

Alicia: There was something else about Neo’s interview that I really

enjoyed, which was that he was extremely grounded and truthful in the call and it was obvious that everything that he was sharing was from his own experience and what he had really learned.

So he didn’t necessarily say this, but what I noticed goes along with what we’re going to talk about today. He put lots of time and energy and heart into learning what he’s learned and sharing it with the world, and that’s really important, versus simply reading about it or hearing about it.

Grant: Thank you, yeah I’ve really tried. I’ve talked to a lot of people across the

country and I’ve really picked out the people who I honestly think have the most to say, and he’s one of them and you guys are two of them.

So a couple things. We’re going to get into five or six major areas, and this is for the guys to give you a sense of what’s to come.

"We’re going to

talk about how to

create a sensually

alive date, and this

is really cool."

We’re going to talk about the difference between eroticism and sensuality. It’s really important to know how they’re different so you can use each one. We’re going to talk about being masculine and

sensual at the same time, something I talk a lot about in the Net2Bed book, being able to convey that you have a sensually alive life.

We’re going to talk about how to meet…and I don’t necessarily want to use the word ‘seduce’…a woman, but create a pleasure zone for her to enter in with you.

Then we’re going to talk about how to create a

sensually alive date, and this is really cool. I love this stuff.

We’re then going to talk about DO-ing, which again Neo mentioned, and it’s orgasmic practice…deliberate orgasm. I want everyone to underline this word ‘deliberate.’ I know everyone’s probably underlining orgasm, but this word ‘deliberate’ is really key to what you guys are about.

So I want everyone to pay attention to every time we talk about being deliberate in your approach to women, how you speak to women, and how you carry yourself with women, and how you approach things like orgasm.

Finally we’ll talk about being a pleasured man in a pain-oriented culture.

But before we get to all that, I want to get to the juice a little bit. Like I said in the beginning, you guys teach pretty….and I haven’t done a workshop yet…but we’ve discussed at length and I know people who have. It’s called…what do you call the workshop?

Erwan: It’s called The Pleasure Course.

Grant: The Pleasure Course. I’d like you to just walk everyone through I think it

was three steps of what it is that you actually do, because it’s very unusual.

Alicia: The three steps of what we actually do?

Grant: Of what you do in The Pleasure Course, the workshop. It’s a weekend

workshop, right?

Alicia: Yes, it’s a weekend workshop. It’s three full days. The way that it’s laid out is the first day we go really deeply into being. So we really get into who you are really behind all of the ways you consider yourself to be in your

personality and your ego and all of that, and really being returned to who you are naturally and inherently.

Grant: Beneath the personality.

Alicia: Exactly. Second, we go into…

Grant: I’m sorry, I’m just going to take a stop here because I don’t know if

everyone’s familiar with that concept. If everyone will just hang onto that idea. If people have questions on what that means to be beneath your personality, maybe after the end, or maybe you guys want to say just another word about what that means.

When you separate yourself from your personality, people might think “Well, then what’s there?” So what is there?

Erwan: It’s a great question, Grant, and there’s a lot of different words we could use. We could say your consciousness. Alicia just used the word ‘being.’ If you get religious or spiritual you could use words like ‘awakening’ or ‘your

Buddha nature’ if you like, your ‘soul,’ the ‘self.’

Let’s just use the word consciousness, because I think that’s a word we can all relate to. If we stripped all of our personalities, all of the traits that separate you from myself from Alicia from the men on the call, something would be left and that would be just our consciousness.

So that’s really what Alicia means when she says ‘being.’ When you’re grounded in that versus grounded in your personality, there’s an enormous amount more freedom to play in life, whether it’s with your career or whether it’s with your sex life or whether it’s with your orgasm, or really whatever it is.

Then your personality isn’t so fixed and rigid. Your personality has enormously more dexterity in those really fun areas of life.

Grant: I’d love to hear you say something about that, because as you’re talking

I’m reflecting on what’s called the seduction community and almost all the seduction community is all about playing on the surface of personality.

It’s about improving your personality, showing confidence, having something to say, striking a certain kind of attitude, and confidence. That works for a lot of guys. It really helps them approach women.

So what does being in touch with your personality-less being get you? How does that work?

Erwan: That’s another great question, it really is. Really what being in touch with that does is it gives you depth. It’s the difference between eating at [inaudible] or The French Laundry or Jardienniere. These are San Francisco restaurants. I’m not sure if you have them in L.A., but they’re great. They’re quality restaurants, versus eating at Kentucky Fried Chicken.

You have depth, you have quality, and it makes it so that your lovemaking is really deep. It still has the juice, it still has the turn-on, the wildness, as Neo alluded to the beast in men and women, it still has all that.

But it also has the consciousness. It also has the love. It also has the

connection. It’s a really well-rounded full meal. It’s not just something that kind of tastes good and then you feel sick afterwards.

But it’s really got depth and it’s really full and you tend to create connections with people that last, whether it’s a sexual research connection or a friendship or maybe a committed relationship for the rest of your life.

Grant: When I’m listening to you I’m hearing two things. One is it kind of pulls the

clinginess and neediness out of sexual and intimate relations. I assume that’s correct.

Alicia: Yes, that’s exactly right. It pulls the clinginess and the neediness out of all sexual relations and relating intimately with anyone, because you’re suddenly really not needing anything because you’re already full, you’re already whole, you’re already being exactly who you are and then enjoying.

Grant: And giving.

Alicia: Really, and enjoying who you’re with.

Grant: Right, and you can really focus more on giving than “What am I getting at

the moment?”

There’s another word that comes to mind, which is one of my favorite words. It’s a personality thing and it just serves so well in every area of my life. It sounds expansive.

I wonder if you have anything to say about being beneath your personality, all your tricks, all your jokes…and I do it. I know I’m guilty of it. All the stuff that people like and all the stuff that we do to get people to like us.

Underneath that there’s something very very expansive. I wonder if you have something to say about that one.

Alicia: It is very expansive in that it is limitless. It’s absolutely limitless. When you’re coming from your personality and your strategies, it’s fixed and it’s limited and there’s only a certain place it can go.

When you’re actually being who you are and being consciousness, there’s no limit to how much you can feel. It’s very expansive, as you’re saying.

"In our course you

actually experience

relating with another

person from total

expansiveness, rather

than from the confines

of your personality."

Erwan: Alicia, would you tie that in to man-woman dynamics. I’d like for us to ground it in a specific example. Let’s talk about how that relates, that

expansiveness that you alluded to, Grant, how that relates to the middle part. We talked about the first part and the pleasure part, Alicia. The middle part is about man-woman dynamics. How does expansiveness relate there?

Alicia: The expansiveness relates in the area of man-woman dynamics and communication in that in our course you actually

experience relating with another person from total expansiveness, rather than from the confines of your personality. So that’s a particular area where you can really see and feel the difference in relating with a woman, for example, and communicating.

You have infinite choices as far as how to communicate and what you do. You can be very creative. You’re not bound by anything.

Erwan: You know how it is if you’re at a bar and you see a woman you’re attracted to and you’re going to approach her. You realize you’re going to do that, and then normally we have a very sort of limited set of options.

But if you’re really grounded in that consciousness and then you see that woman across the bar or across the party, you have an infinite number of ways to

approach her and you’re not going to come from a fixed personality, a fixed set of options.

Maybe the way to approach her is going to be really bold and you’re going to make a bee-line over there. Maybe the way to approach her is going to be to have the waitress bring her a glass of wine. Maybe the way to approach her is you’re there with a friend who happens to be a woman and you send your woman friend over to say hello first. It’s just infinite.

But when we’re stuck in our personality it’s like multiple choice: A, B, or C, and you’ve got a maybe 1 in 5 chance that that’s actually going to work.

Grant: That’s a really key point. I always correct everyone in my life…I’m

probably very annoying…when they say things like, “Sorry I’m late. I’m just a late person.”

I say, “No, you’re a person who happens to have arranged your life so that you’re habitually late. You’re not intrinsically late.”

So people really do limit themselves a lot with this kind of categorizing and pigeon-holing of who they are.

So somehow you strip that out. I wonder if you’d just give one example, just really quickly, of how. What kind of exercise might they do? And again really quickly because I want to move to the other stuff.

Erwan: Yeah, the bottom line on that, just to get to the heart of it, is a person has to see what their trip…that’s what we call it, your trip, your head trip, other people might call it your ego, even your personality as you

mentioned…you have to see what your trip is.

So you see what your trip is. You see what your personality is. You see what your ego looks like, that thing you’ve been considering yourself to be, that fixed limited set of options. You see what that is.

Then what we do is we put people in exercises where they literally practice relating not from any of that, and you see what’s left. And what’s left is the same thing for all of us, it’s the consciousness.

So the bottom line answer to your question, Grant, is you see what your personality trip is and then you see what’s left, and that’s your being or your consciousness or your very nature.

Grant: I imagine that that stripping away process is pretty painful for a lot of

people, because our personality is where we live. It makes us feel good.

Erwan: You know, you’re exactly right. It can be very painful, but it doesn’t have to be. That’s one reason we call it The Pleasure Course.

If you’re willing, if you’re really willing to grow, willing to develop…see, one of the things that I got listening to the Erotic Mastery teleconference call last time from yourself and Neo was I was just impressed and it just dawned on me like, “Wow, this is this whole group of people spread throughout L.A. and really the whole nation committed to growing and to developing in this area.”

That’s the secret. When you’re willing and committed and open to growing, it doesn’t have to be painful. If somebody points out your ego trip and if you let it go, it’s actually not. It’s really liberating.

But if you hold onto it and you make whoever, your therapist, or in this case us, the course leaders, who are ripping it away from you…oh my god, you might as well be getting your whole body whacked. It’s just horrible.

Grant: Yeah, and let me tell everybody, these are two very intensive people. As

jovial as they sound, I get the feeling that no bullshit gets through in your workshop. You’re probably very compassionate, but you probably really do dig

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